BB&W Book Discussion: Kola Boof and “The Sexy Part of the Bible”

This is weird. It WASNT this bad when Motown was king.....what made these rappers become colorstruck? was it Prince and his crew in the 80s? since they were the first biracial performers? Was it the video culture? We did go thru a Black is Beautiful period with the fro, Cicely Tyson, Grace Jones etc. I think it may be videos...BTW I went to cowboy bars and got dances, more than the white girls there, probably because its not a 'black thing'..shes right. White guys who are married to black women see it too since the guys are in both worlds

BYW you have a really nice voice!

Good job on this interview. Interesting stuff. I didn't know about the NAACP change. Not surprising though.

@Ironbutterfly....I think you are getting my point exactly. We as women can encourage the appreciation of beauty in all colors, but we have to surround the boys with men who feel the same way. Men seek validation from other men regarding their choices....they don't mind validation from women, but the men around them count more. It just seems like that is how they work...why have arm candy...b/c you know other men will envy you. It's an uphill battle.

I have two boys Melanie and have thought about this since they were born. I have photos of BW in my room and when they come in they see them. They tell me my hair is pretty and that I am pretty, but I wonder about black males around them as well as larger society. One time my boys made a comment about a girl that just becaue she is a girl she is a princess and every time they said that they were referring to a little white girl. I wondered if they would say the same thing if the little girl were black. Luckily they did refer to a little black girl as a princess and I started to worry less, but I have my work cut out for me. I am now seeking male mentors who love and appreciate BW. I know I can only go so far with them and then a man will have to take over on some aspects. But he will have to be a man that is healthy.

Where did my comment go? :(

I think that Ms. Boof hit on an aspect of the hatred of black beauty that is little discussed. I had a similar conversation with my mother. Ms. Boof stated that bw need to raise our boys to appreciate and love black beauty so that they will not have the mindset that those who look like their mothers are not worthy and beautiful. While I agree that bw don't help the cause by saying things like 'good hair' and she's too dark etc, a boy/man/male looks to what other men find attractive...not what other women find attractive. If the men around the boy do not find a certain type of woman attractive it would extremely hard for a mommy to tell a boy the type of woman he should find attractive. I'll give an example: I have daughters so it's not exactly the same, but my kids are told all the time that they are cute by strangers etc. I think they are beautiful too (maybe I am a little biased), and I think that it is ok that they believe that thye are beautiful. But I would only have a problem if they thought that the ONLY beautiful people were the ones that look like them. Now my hubby is always telling my girls how 'hot' he thinks I am...that they have a pretty mommy etc (I am only stating this for the example, ok) anyway, I look much different than they look...darker, button nose different hair etc.) So I believe that since their dad who is a guy can see beauty in different types why wouldn't they be able to do the same thing. Now I know a hispanic lady who is married to a bm. She told me (why...) that her hubby said that he would NEVER marry a bw. Whatever....anyway he has a daughter....do you think that she will grow up to think that she is better and cuter than the average bg out there....her father has declared that bw are not good enough for him to marry....I don't want to make this too long, but I just think that it is an uphill battle for women to try to raise boys to see something that the other men that surround them do not see or appreciate. Men teach boys to become men...women cannot do this. And black boys will not appreciate black beauty on the whole as long as they are exposed to other crazy thinking bm. Ms. Boof gave the example of BO. He was raised by white grandparents and not his father....maybe his father had positive things to say re: bw (he has other wives) what if his father had remained in his life...I don't know him, but we do not know if BO would have had such positive feelings about dark bw if his father didnt believe in black beauty....I don't know how BO father feels about bw...just a thought....

I just started my staycation today and just finished listening to the interview. I will definitely be checking for more of what Kola Boof has to offer! She's very insightful. We as black women need to have a mind of our own. It is IMPERATIVE! This book is DEFINITELY my next read!

Where can I get this book?

Im buying this book on Thursday. On Friday, I will be under my umbrella with my drink reading this book.

I cannot wait!

This is great! Thanks!

Black men seem to not want us, but don't want anyone else to want us either. You have the audacity to be upset that the sister chooses the white guy when you guys are choosing everything but the sister? I constantly hear how in demand you all are. How us sisters need to step up our game and start competing with these other women for YOU. When you're on you're road to success, snatching up a beautiful like minded sister, in order to produce a powerful progressive black family is a non fucking factor to you. So save it. I'll stick with the guy who doesn't feel a problem with making me feel like a lady, who thinks that
I'm deserving of being courted, who values and reaffirms my beauty against the odds. My entire life you've been telling me and showing me that I'm just "alright", that I'm not enough, but once the next dude comes along and wants to flaunt me all about you pretend to care then? Sure I may look fiercer now. I had to build myself up brick by brick with no help at all from you. And sure that attention and praise that I'm receiving from Brad helps to brighten my aura that much more. Can't deny that it took me a little while to look this fierce. I kept listening to your dumb ass and was blinded from the truth and therefor so were you. But don't come for me now. I don't want you anymore. Black prince you have been pushed off your pedestal and now YOU are a non fucking factor. I'll definitely be getting your book Kola.

this should be on madamenoire.com

Awesome interview!.
Someone wrote in another thread that I'm "missing the nuances" of (black?)American culture. Perhaps it's more that I see this world like Kola Boof said at the end, we should: reconnect to our femaleness and not be fighting ONLY racism to our detriment!.

Will be purchasing this at bookdepository!

Danke vielmals, Christelyn!

I'm going to read this book and suggest it to a book club I'm in. I wonder what the bw in my book club will think. There is so much denial with bw.

Thank-you for this very powerful interview. I just downloaded everything available on Amazon from Ms.Boof to my Kindle.

There is saying that "The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world." Black women forget this at their peril.

aw...I'm in moderation? what I do?

lol i thought this was going to discuss King Solomon's relationship with his wife(a black woman about whom he wrote Songs of Solomon; an erotic book that wasn't allowed to be read in hebrew culture until you were 30. haha Biblical Erotica)....or i thought it was going to discuss King Solomon being bi-racial and a product of King David(Jewish) and Bathsheba(African Woman).

haha I was way off huh.

Perfect interview, Yes, Kola tells it like it is.

I have so many thoughts on what was said, I really do not know where to start. Kola and Christelyn did an excellent job and covered some very important topics. I have visited Kola's website, copied some of her recipes, thanks.

I suppose men like sean combs and jayz(if he has one) will buy their dark (jayz, it is possible) daughters some skin lighting pills.

Thanks to the bw bloggers who bought it to my attention that the majority of the NAACP really do not much pay attention to bw until, a wm does something to a bw and how often does that happen? Therefore, the majority of bw are not benefitting from the NAACP. Actually, I do not follow the NAACP but, if the leadership guy whatever his name is, believes the NAACP should be for all people of color he is a dam fool. I have been reading other minority cultures' websites and not one other minority culture has said anything in reference to assisting AA people to do anything. These people are quitely taking care of themselves, something the now defunct NAACP should be practicing.
The NAACP's leader probably is trying to make it easier for bm who are married to non-bw. Who the heck does he thinks he is fooling?
Supporting other minorities without reciprocity is foolish, there goes more resources.

Kola is right, we must keep our dating options open to all races of men.

Amazing... Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!

HAHAHA and I haven't heard the interview...penis size, hahaha.

Thank you sooo much Christelyn for this interview. if this don't wake up black women...nothing will. Go Kola!!! :)

Excellent interview Christelyn!

I'll be purchasing the book and I'm looking forward to participating in the book discussion.

OMG! I co-sign EVERYTHING Kola discussed in this interview! She is spot-on in her outlook on colorism, racism, interracial relationships, BET, etc. I plan to buy her book.

I stopped drinking the Black Community "kool-aid" years ago and I have absolutely NO loyalty to Black men because I woke up YEARS ago and saw the writing on the wall. As a beautiful dark-skinned woman, I was put down by Black Man for my color. I try to "enlighten" other Black Women in my circle but they just don't get it.