And unlike the (now infamous) poll about black women having a better physical self image than their white counterparts despite the fact that 80% of us are technically overweight, this poll is based not on delusion, but reality. What people fail to mention is that many black women glean that esteem not in a vacuum, but because men like Sir Mix-a-Lot glorifies the extra pounds. While there’s nothing wrong with a round rump, just know most men like to see a waistline to occompany it.

“Black women look 16 until they’re 80,” says David Flint, who prefers dating women of color, but also perfers a woman to be fit and a healthy weight.

I recently had a conversation with a white, male friend of mine, David Flint, who prefers the looks of darker-skinned women, jokingly tell me that “Black women look 16 until they’re like, 80.”

I wouldn’t go that far, but I’d say he’s on to something–black women (and darker skinned women in general) have thicker skin, stronger collagen connections, and less sun damage than their fiar-skinned counterparts. Not to brag, but I’ll be 40 this year and I still get carded for alcohol. Regularly.

Allure, do us a favor…let us have this. This is not delusion, this is a truism.

What it is

Barlean’s Omega Swirl is an emulsified fish oil or flax seed formula that delivers the necessary Omega 3 and Omega 6 essential fatty acids that nutritionally support:

• Heart Health
• Cholesterol Levels Already Within a Healthy Range
• Joint Mobility and Bone Density
• Energy and Endurance
• Skin, Hair and Nail Health
• Mental Health, Wellness and Acuity
• Blood Glucose Levels Already Within a Healthy Range
• Sexual and Hormonal Health

Here’s the thing: Barlean’s formula does all that stuff without the awful fish burps you get from traditional fish oil caplets. Plus, they’re the only manufacturer I’ve seen that can deliver the nutrients into something truly tasty. The Babster loves the coconut pineapple and eats it like candy. As for me, I just bought the chocolate/raspberry Essential Women’s formula, with evening primrose, flax seed oil, and soy isoflavones. Flax seed oil and fish oil are pretty much interchangeable, because they both provide the chain of Omega 3 fatty acids. Except with flax, your body will have to take the extra step to convert it.

I’m upping my Omega intake because research shows it’s beneficial for the hair, nails and skin, plus assists with mood regulation. They also assist in anxiety and mood disorders, which I have, and manage.

I got the idea after reading The Belly Fat Cure, when the author, Jorge Cruise, recommended Omega Swirl and Clemmy’s ice cream, both of which are sugar free. A scoop of vanilla Clemmy’s and a squirt of Essential Woman, and I’m getting my Omegas and female-friendly oils all at once. And note: even though this is an “oil,” it’s highly emulsified and has the consistency of a sauce. If you can rid your mind of the thought of putting fish oil on your ice cream, you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

While the “sauce” looks more chocolate than raspberry, the berry taste is prominent and the chocolate is more of an end note. If you want a more chocolatey taste, mix a little sugar-free chocolate sauce and then…yum.

However, having tried all of the flavors, my TOP pick is the strawberry banana. If you’re interested, now’s probably the time to buy some because more stores are having their New Year’s resolutions sales. You can find them in the refrigerated section where they keep the probiotics.

Geesh. She could be the star of one of those “Scared Straight” shows, if they did one on the dangers of boiling you skin with baby oil for that St. Tropez tan.

Now, let’s put this photo into perspective. Goldie is 66. Sixty Six. The rest of her body is in EXCELLENT shape, not just for her age, but by anyone’s standards, considering the majority of Americans are overweight.

Let’s also keep in mind that Goldie Hawn was/is a product of her time. Back in the 1960′s women tanned themselves, literally to death.

Goldie had to put in some serious time in the sun to live up to her name. But what you see in that first picture is not all natural aging. That’ photoaging–wrinkles, dark spots and loss of collagen because of prolonged sun exposure. Ninety percent of wrinkles are caused by the sun’s UV (ultraviolet light).

I bet some of you ladies are feeling a bit smug right now, thinking you’re safe from sun damage because you don’t lay out and because you have the extra protection of more melanin in your skin. Newsflash: You’re not immune to sun damage. While you may not wrinkle like a deflated balloon, sun damage weakens the collagen binding underneath the skin and cause it to sag. That’s why you sometimes see older black women with faces that appear to look like a candle melting.

Granted, loss of collagen is part of the natural aging process, but prolonged sun exposure hastens this, and will also lead to blotchiness and dark spots due to hyperpigmentation.

From the American Academy of Dermatology:

Long-term solar irradiation produces both morphologic and functional changes in affected skin. Because collagen is the major structural component of skin, any alteration in its production or degradation could have profound effects on cutaneous functional integrity.

Start Early to Protect Your Skin

If you mom didn’t slather the “scum scream” (as The Babster likes to call it) on you, know that it’s never too early to prepare yourself for looking good as a geriatric. Make sure your day time moisturizer has an SPF in it–no exceptions. You should even put it on if your in the house or it’s cloudy outside. Sun rays are relentless. Dermatologists all agree that sunscreen is by far the most effective beauty item you can use. Make sure your foundation also contains an SPF.

Wear sunglasses when you’re outside, like, all the time. Even and especially when you’re driving. The skin around your eyes is especially vulnerable to sun damage, from dark circles to all out crow’s feet. Since putting sunscreen on your eye area will result in “WTF did I do that for?!” syndrome, get some good glasses.

Get a hat collection. I have about 15 hats that I alternate with according to season. Not only do they provide me with an extra layer of sun protection, the hats sub as a protective style for my natural locks. Done, and done.

Beyond Black and White

The holidays are quickly upon us, and chances are, you’ll be invited to at least one gala this season. What will you do when you’re expected to dump those sweats and slap on some makeup? Better take inventory, fast.

Set Your Palette

Before you put one brush of makeup to your face, make sure you’ve got your skin primed and ready. Start the night before with a good exfoliator to slough off spent skin to achieve a holiday glow. There’s a variety of choices available to rid yourself of dead skin, but I tend to go for the less-gritty and less-messy fruit acid-based exfoliators. I’m using a Revitalizing Facial Peel. It’s got glycolic acid and retinyl which does wonders for skin of a… certain age. Use it twice a week before bedtime and you’ll wake up with softer, smoother, plumper skin, with that “glow.”

The Eyes Have It

Here’s an often-overlooked step women miss when it comes to dressing up their eyes–get the red out. A couple of drops of redness relieving eye drops will contract ugly blood vessels in the eyes and make them appear whiter and brighter. Whiter, brighter eyes make you look more youthful and amplify your makeup.

Beef Up Your Lashes

The quickest and most efficient way to get your eyes to “pop” is with falsies. Unfortunately for me, I just can’t make these things work for me. The glue sticks to my fingers and both sides of the fake eye lashes, then by the end of the night the sides start to lift, which is super embarrassing. I’ve tried the eye conditioners that claim to grow your own lashes, and some of them work, but most are just “meh” for me. That leaves good old mascara. COVERGIRLÆ Clump Crusher Mascara is an affordable option. Don’t let the skinny brush on the wand fool you–your eyelashes will pop after a few flicks of your wrist. The tiny, tight spacing of the wand is the selling point because the shape keeps clumps at bay. As a result, COVERGIRL Clump Crusher Mascara gives you 200% more volume than previous COVERGIRL LashBlast Mascaras and leaves zero clumps, even after 30 strokes.

Don’t Forget Your Hands!

Besides your eyes, another top feature not to forget is your hands. Put on a statement ring on any finger except your thumb or ring finger (why cause confusion if you’re single and looking?) Don’t forget to throw a little paint on those nails after you file them. If you have short stubby nails like me, opt for a lighter color. Got nails long and strong? Go bold. I’m a sucker for purple, but the popular darker shades just accentuate how dang short my nails are. That’s why I got really excited about CoverGirlÆ Outlast Stay Brilliant Nail Gloss, because 1) you can skip a bunch of steps– no need for base coat or top coat because the formula provides all you need in a polish and gives you glossy nail color for up to a week without the need for a top coat!, and 2) they have a lovely light lavender color that makes my nubbin fingernails look decent enough to show in public.

Visit COVERGIRL on YouTube for more great ideas on how to get red carpet ready!

What makes YOU feel ‘red carpet ready’ and what are YOUR go-to tricks?

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Dark Circles

Black women of all shades can experience dark circles under their eyes. This is caused by a loss of volume that accentuates the more melanin and pigment in the eye area. Because we lose subcutaneous fat as we age, dark circles (otherwise known as raccoon eyes) are more pronounced. No amount of sleep or cold compresses will make these discolorations go away, but there’s still something you can do. There’s the drastic option–injecting a fat-like substance under the eye muscle for $500-$700 a pop, or the way cheaper option, like a good concealer. My favorite is Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics.

On the site, the company claims the following about the purifying cream:

Active Ingredients:

• Alpine stem cells: DNA protection, preventative protection against light-induced skin aging
• OsmoTec: Catalyst, optimizes the processing of active ingredients in the cells.
• Phytosphingosine, farnesol: Prevents the growth of bacteria
• Hamamelis extract: Astringent effect
• Horsetail extract: Astringent effect, promotes the healing of wounds
• Active ingredient complex comprising yeast, vitamin B and niacinamide: Regulates the sebum balance
• Vitamin E: Protects against free radicals
• Macadamia nut oil, jojoba oil: For soft and supple skin
• Panthenol, allantoin: Moisturizing, calming effect

When I asked about what specifically makes this product work, I got this answer: “Osmotec is presented in all the SKINOVAGE PX products — it mimics our own osmosis and boosts and multiples the exchange within the inside and outside of the cell. It also assure that the active ingredient reaches the heart of the skin cell.”

Uh…what the heck does that mean in English?

Alpine skin cells are the hot new thing in skin care these days, says Wendy Lewis, publisher of Beauty in a Bag. Referring to alpine rose stem cells, Personal Care Magazine reports:

The ingredient helps the skin’s barrier which has been compromised due to age and environmental  factors such as UV and humidity changes. Reduced barrier function leads to very dry and sensitive skin. Tested on human epidermal stem cells, PhytoCellTec Alp Rose was found to increase the vitality of skin stem cells. This improves epidermal regeneration and thus the quality of the skin barrier.

I wasn’t able to get anything on “Osmo Tec,” so I’ll just have to take their word for it.

The other item I’m like is the Intensifier Illuminating Serum. THIS my dears, is what’s giving me THE GLOW. Here’s what’s in it:

Active Ingredients:

• Micronaspheres: Light-reflecting pigments; illuminating effect
• Waltheria indica: Brightens the complexion
• Organic silica: Improves the tissue structure
• Perfection peptides: Light exfoliation of the skin, evens the complexion
• Aloe vera: Moisturizing and calming effect
• Allantoin: Calming effect
• Polysaccharides: Provides moisture
• Panthenol: Provides moisture

Like I mentioned in the video, my only peeve is the strong perfume smell, which is totally unnecessary and takes away from the product. I had a few small whiteheads when I first used it, but that’s since resolved as my skin has adjusted to it. I now only use the BABOR products in the morning prior to applying my sunscreen, and keep to my Innovative Skincare at night.

So…I got this product for free. But at $78 dollars a bottle, would I buy it again?

Yep.

Most (normal) parent want better for their kids, and I swore to myself upon her 13th year that I would protect her from the pizza-faced demon, even if it meant I would have to take the quixotic journey through the Macy’s or Nordstrom’s labyrinthine cosmetics counter.

Turns out I didn’t have to. The folks at BeyondClear hit me up a few weeks ago about a their new line of acne-fighting products just in time for Maxi Me’s latest post-menstrual full facial acne attack.

Here’s the line-up:

I let Maxi Me take charge of managing this review, since I’ve finally exorcised the pizza-faced demon. She used these items for approximately three weeks. She likes it overall, and here’s the results.

I coaxed Maxi Me to strike a pose, and she did so in typical adolescent fashion.

Pros: This stuff works–and quickly. During the worst of her breakout, she used this:

Cons: While the products were effective, Maxi Me felt like the Spot Clearing Accelerator was a bit irritating. She told me it burned, but that’s probably because of the salicylic acid, which is an effective acne fighter. It didn’t leave any redness or signs of burning on her skin, so the sensation was temporary. Her favorite product is the cleanser “It’s tacky and thick and feels like it works,” she says. Her least favorite is the Clarifying Treatment, which claims to foam, but apparently not to her satisfaction. (I just pumped it; it foams. I think Maxi Me is just being a teenager).

As the outside observer of The Teenager’s skin care regimen, I can totally see the difference in her skin, and at $29.95, this stuff get’s Mom’s stamp of approval.

All Eyes on You

But what I have focused on enough is the Restorative Eye Complex, because honestly, when the company first sent it to me I really didn’t think I’d need it. I didn’t have any wrinkles or dark circles. Yet I used it anyway, and something interesting happened. There was more of a smoothness and brightness that was definitely noticeable. The photo below is completely untouched, and I don’t have a lick of make up on.

Also, keep in mind that I’ll be 40 next year. This IS NOT natural, in the sense that I was not arbitrarily blessed with good skin. I work SUPER hard at it, which only gives the illusion that it’s carefree maintenance.

Benefits of the eye cream:
–Smoothes, hydrates and reduces under-eye wrinkles
–Reduces puffiness and dark circles
–Improves skin firmness and elasticity
offers immediate and long term results
–Helps prevent DNA damage

The key ingredients are peptides, hyaluronic acid and Vitamin E, gotu kola, cooper tripeptides, and some other fancy-schmancy stuff.

The bottle is small, but since you only need a dab of it, a little goes a long way. Oh, and it ain’t cheap. It’s $78 of very well-spent dinero.

Exfoliation

The second item added to my Innovative Skin Care arsenal is the Exfoliating Enzyme Treatment. I know I keep nagging about this, but exfoliation is key to healthy, glowing skin. It also reduces the likelihood of blackheads, white heads, and lemon heads. (Just added the last one to make sure you were paying attention.)

Again, at $78 a pop, it’s pricy. But if it works, it’s worth every dang-on penny. You can’t be all cheap with your skin ladies. It’s the only one you’ll have until you die. If it’s any reassurance to you, the directions say you need only use the product once every two weeks–it’s just that effective. Key ingredients are papya enzymes and micro-beads and copper to firms, hydrate and stimulate collagen production.

Yesterday my mother-in-law treated all us girls to a spa day at a snazzy place in Westport called, Coco Spa, and I had my pick of a manicure, pedicure, facial or massage. Yoga and pilates usually keeps me as loose as a noodle, so I opted for the facial. Lee, the purveyor of my procedure, looked at me quizzically. At first I thought she might have been eyeballing me because I was the only chic with the spectacular afro in the group, but she later told me it was because she give my face an initial once-over a few feet away over the counter and thought I didn’t need a facial, and thought I’d be wasting her time and my mother-in-law’s money.

That is, until she examined my pores under the gigantic microscope. She took one look and gasped. “Oh my God…” Lee said in almost a whisper in her choppy Korean accent. I’m all like, “What?” She didn’t answer, just got to work squeezing and pressing. She paused between smooshing my nose, and told me to take this photo for prosperity. She was convinced no one would believe this much goop came out of my face.

No; those aren’t maggots you see. Those are my pores…vomiting. Don’t cringe–this is what you might look like when you wait five years between professional extractions.  On the bright side, Lee told me that THIS is the reason that at 39, I have no wrinkles. My face is full of cholesterol and sebum, which acts as a natural moisturizer.  Once that oil reaches the surface, oxygen turns the tips black. Stop reading for a second, and go look at your nose. See any tiny black spots? Chances are you nose, forehead and chin look like mine, and you need a date with Lee.

Why You Need Professional Help

I don’t care how fancy your facial cleansers are, nothing gets those little maggots out except putting the squeeze to them. Leave them in too long, and your pores become enlarged and deformed, sometimes never closing quite the same, even after you’ve ridded yourself of those oil laden interlopers. Here’s the kicker though–it’s best you don’t try this at home, kiddies. I know, because I’ve tried, and most times my handwork has led to scarring, and a few weeks of hyperpigmentation.

Lee used a combination of suction (sort of like a miniature vacuum cleaner) and a small needle to gently and carefully open the smaller pores on my chin and forehead.

The blackhead-er-ator

The special needle and the vacuum suction thing-y

I have to give this lady credit, because with all that, I didn’t really feel much pain. She’s a pro. Sidenote: Don’t get a facial with heavy extractions anywhere NEAR your period, lest you be in a world of hurt. Not sure why, but the hormones affect pain receptors, and not in a good way.

Here’s how I looked after it was all over:

Lee informed me that I’ll have to come back a few more times to get it all, so I’ll probably start adding bimonthly facials to my preventative skin care regimen. A few tips she left me with that I want to pass on to the ladies with oily skin

–Don’t use heavy night cream. You don’t need it. Opt for a light moisturizer instead.

–When you do moisturize, leave your nose out of it.

–Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen, chicas. It’s the fountain of youth. If your skin is oily, opt for lighter formulations.

BlogHer thought I might be interested in doing a review for Dove, who has a new line of cream body washes. I’m on an never-ending search to find THE shower gel/cream/soap that will leave my skin feeling like I don’t need to roll around in butter afterward.

I’m afraid my search continues.

As far as shower soaps go, it’s pretty good. The scent is nice, light, and not too perfume-y, and it gives a great lather. No wonder–Sodium Laureth Sulfate (SLS) is the fifth ingredient. But this formula left me wanted for moisture, despite the company claiming that it was it’s “highest concentration of NutriumMoisture and added Vitamin E. However, since Vitamin E is the very last ingredient, we can assume there’s not much of it in there. The cap, which is located at the bottom of the bottle, is somewhat unruly with slippery fingers. I know they were going for a nice, sleek design, but constantly have to turn the bottle upside down and right side up is just one extra step.

Dove also claims that the cleanser will help your skin look better over time, and my skin all over is looking better. But who knows why? Could be the kale, fish oil, or all the water I’ve been drinking lately.

Final word: I don’t hate it. I don’t love it. But I’ve used much worse, and if this was all I had to wash myself for the rest of my life, I wouldn’t cry over it.

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