Beyond Black & White » Audio Posts http://www.beyondblackwhite.com Chronicles, Musings and Debates about Interracial & Intercultural Relationships Thu, 30 Oct 2014 23:48:00 +0000 en-US hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=4.0 Yolette and Dustin, Wedded Bliss http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/yolette-dustin-wedded-bliss/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/yolette-dustin-wedded-bliss/#comments Mon, 17 Feb 2014 06:06:39 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=28617 I met Yvette Joseph Burger via Swirling and Marriage.  Yolette submitted some of her gorgeous wedding photos and now I am sharing with you.  I got a few engagement photos too. Yolette is so pretty and her beautiful skin is to die for —  flawless.  Dustin’s eyes are piercing and mesmerizing!   Enjoy photographs of Yolette and her new hubby […]

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I met Yvette Joseph Burger via Swirling and Marriage.  Yolette submitted some of her gorgeous wedding photos and now I am sharing with you.  I got a few engagement photos too. Yolette is so pretty and her beautiful skin is to die for —  flawless.  Dustin’s eyes are piercing and mesmerizing!   Enjoy photographs of Yolette and her new hubby Dustin in their wedded bliss.   Photo credits: Silvafilm  Photography.

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Do You Recognize a Psycho When You See One? Jordan Harbinger, “Swirlr” Co-Host Interviews an Admitted Sociopath http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/must-listen-jordan-harbinger-swirlr-co-host-interviews-admitted-sociopath/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/must-listen-jordan-harbinger-swirlr-co-host-interviews-admitted-sociopath/#comments Thu, 13 Feb 2014 06:37:13 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=28579 My friend and “Swirlr” co-host, Jordan Harbinger just interviewed a very dangerous man: an admitted narcissistic psychopath. You must listen when you can. It WILL help you protect yourself. There are more of these people walking amongst us that we realize. “As a psychopath I abuse as thoughtlessly and automatically as you breathe … I […]

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My friend and “Swirlr” co-host, Jordan Harbinger just interviewed a very dangerous man: an admitted narcissistic psychopath. You must listen when you can. It WILL help you protect yourself. There are more of these people walking amongst us that we realize.

“As a psychopath I abuse as thoughtlessly and automatically as you breathe … I find it pleasurable to inflict pain on people.”  – Sam Vaknin

Unknown

Meet the man whose affliction is also his field of expertise.

In one of the most chilling episodes we’ve ever done, we speak to Sam Vaknin, a real-life Psychopathic Narcissist.

Sam Vaknin is the author of Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited and other books about personality disorders.

In this episode, Sam tells us how he found out he was a psychopathic narcissist, what causes these conditions, why people like him are so dangerous and, more importantly, how we can spot early warning signs in others before it’s too late (and what to do if we do see them -HINT: Run).

 

Take a listen here.

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Check Me Out on “Art of Charm’s” Pick Up Podcast! http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/check-art-charms-pick-podcast/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/check-art-charms-pick-podcast/#respond Mon, 26 Aug 2013 14:13:29 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=24743 Jordan and I got together for this podcast on interracial relationships, and guys, you'll want to take a listen to this one.

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Me and Jordan

Wow…two posts in one day with two of my FAVORITE-EST male relationship coaches!

Jordan and I got together for this podcast on interracial relationships, and guys, you’ll want to take a listen to this one.

Here’s what we talk about:

In this episode:

–Overcoming preconceived notions about the dating preferences of women outside your racial and/or ethnic group

–How to reference racial differences without sounding like a douchebag

–Dealing with external pressure about interracial relationships

–Understanding cultural difference when flirting and making overtures

–Top ten turn-offs that men new to interracial dating do

–Why you need to understand and recognize body language cues, in order to date interracially with success.

–Why being a “people pleaser” can kill your chances with women of color.

–How to become more culturally aware and why this could save your relationship.

Check out the full interview here!

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Abiola Abrams and Mollena Williams Address Now-Infamous Letter That Called Interracial Relationships Into Question http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/abiola-abrams-mollena-williams-address-now-infamous-letter-called-interracial-relationships-question/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/abiola-abrams-mollena-williams-address-now-infamous-letter-called-interracial-relationships-question/#comments Thu, 11 Apr 2013 14:39:20 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=20637 A boatload of you asked me to address the letter published in Essence.com from a black woman who alleged that her white husband called her racial slurs during sex. Many of you thought the letter was a complete fake, manufactured with every known cliche thrown at black women in order to preclude them from dating out.

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A boatload of you asked me to address the letter published in Essence.com from a black woman who alleged that her white husband called her racial slurs during sex. Many of you thought the letter was a complete fake, manufactured with every known cliche thrown at black women in order to preclude them from dating out. Let’s review it, shall we?

Dear Abiola,

My man keeps calling me a “nigger bitch” during sex and I hate it.

I have been married for a year and I am at my wit’s end. My investment banker husband is from a White old money family. I am a first generation Black-American woman whose family is from the island of Jamaica. We met at a reunion for the ivy league school we both attended, and he proposed in six months.

We have the picture perfect fantasy life. He wines and dines me and we travel and shop the globe. Unlike all of the Black men I dated in the past, my husband is generous, loyal, committed and considerate. He courted me and I never have to pay for anything. He said I could quit my job and I did. He makes me feel like a woman.

I am a little embarrassed to share our problem. The first time he let the n-word drop was during sex on our honeymoon. When I reacted negatively, he explained that a Black woman he dated in the past enjoyed being called racial slurs. Another time he joked that he had purchased my freedom. He also speculated about whether his family could have owned mine because I have “good hair.” Then he made jokes about my pubic hair. He called it my “negro bush” and referred to himself as a “nigger lover.” He says I am being overly sensitive because he loves me to death and should get a “Black pass” for marrying me.

I told him that I don’t appreciate these comments and he says that my friends and family probably use the n-word all the time. He also asked why Black people can use the word and he cannot. I don’t use the word or believe in the nigga/nigger differentiation. Neither does my family. I am too embarrassed to tell anyone about this because I know they might say: “That’s what she gets for marrying a White man.”

Every time we try having sex again, the slurs fly. Our sex life is pretty much over right now because I pretend to be asleep every time my sexy, handsome man wants to be with me. I feel completely turned off. I love my husband deeply so please don’t tell me to leave him because that’s not what I want to do.

My husband was my first interracial relationship. Please tell me racial slurs aren’t normal between interracial couples? I would like to figure this out before we have kids but I can’t afford to leave him and still maintain my lifestyle.

How can I regain my sexual attraction for my husband?

Signed,

Black and Proud

Many of us thought this note was an affront to people in interracial relationships and thought that this was a thinly-veiled attempt to thwart people transcending race to find love–especially black women. It could be. But, it could also be 100% real. That’s the risk you take when you lend advice via email letters–you can never truly know who’s on the other end. I know this from personal experience, as I get advice letters myself almost daily. That’s why I wanted to address it here with the responder of the letter, Abiola Abrams along with Mollena Williams, who was quoted as a source.

I want to again reiterate that Abiola Abrams has been nothing but supportive of black women finding interracial love. She’s also been a supporter of this blog and the book. I appreciate her taking the time (and risk) of further explaining this here.

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Author Says Organized Religion Has It All Wrong http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/author-says-organized-religion-has-it-all-wrong/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/author-says-organized-religion-has-it-all-wrong/#comments Tue, 14 Feb 2012 06:11:48 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=4419 Have you ever (like me) sat through a church service and listened to some doctrine that seemed to be way out wacky, or search as you might, you couldn't find a single verse in the bible that told you that you couldn't dance, drink, have sex and like it, or that it was absolutely mandatory that church ladies over the age of 60 must wear hats like the Chiquita Banana lady?

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Have you ever (like me) sat through a church service and listened to some doctrine that seemed to be way out wacky, or search as you might, you couldn’t find a single verse in the bible that told you that you couldn’t dance, drink, have sex and like it, or that it was absolutely mandatory that church ladies over the age of 60 must wear hats like the Chiquita Banana woman?

That’s why some many people are so pissed off with organized religion and are just about ready to chuck it altogether. I sat down with Shay Dawkins, author of “The Good News: How Revealing Delusions In Christianity Will Bring Peace To All,” and he confirmed a lot of things I’ve been thinking and feeling for a long time.

Take a listen, and then decide for yourself.

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