Beyond Black & White http://www.beyondblackwhite.com Chronicles, Musings and Debates about Interracial & Intercultural Relationships Fri, 20 Apr 2018 04:40:07 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.5 Black Women: Victims of the Biggest Hustle in Human History. http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/black-women-victims-biggest-hustle-human-history/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/black-women-victims-biggest-hustle-human-history/#comments Tue, 16 Jan 2018 11:07:27 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=43780 Recently I met a phenomenal woman named Portia. She wrote a Facebook post that moved me, and I simply had to know more about her. I would soon find out that she is the typical high achieving, intelligent and beautiful black woman who has acquired multiple degrees and financial success while being dogged out by […]

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Recently I met a phenomenal woman named Portia. She wrote a Facebook post that moved me, and I simply had to know more about her.

I would soon find out that she is the typical high achieving, intelligent and beautiful black woman who has acquired multiple degrees and financial success while being dogged out by the black men in her life. If not for the internet, where we can collate our own stories and cross-check the similarities with other women, we would have thought we were crazy. There were just too many stories with the same themes to continue to dismiss as bad luck and poor choices.

The game has been rigged ladies, and we have been the victims of the biggest hustle in human history.

Can you think of any other race or culture in which the women are forced to be the protectors and providers, to work and to give until we bleed, sacrifice and endure the worst behaviors from our male counterparts? What other culture blames the women for not “choosing better” while knowing all along that the choices were paltry?

The Role of Black Women in the Hustle

Black women are so brainwashed by the hustle that OTHER black women enforce penalties for black women who stray.  Even after my new friend, Dr. Portia, was abandoned by her attorney husband when their child was 11 months old, and put her out of the house so he could marry another, lighter-skinned and “prettier” woman, her OWN MOTHER advised her to go back on her hands and knees and BEG him to take her back. How many millions of stories are out there just like this? How many black women have actively worked to destroy and discredit this platform over the years in the service of black men who don’t like us “getting ideas?” This is the level of pathology we endure from our own mothers, sisters, aunts, cousins, and friends who coerce us into remaining in such dysfunction all under the illusion of normality.

The biggest hustle of black women has been convincing them that they have more to fear from white men fetishizing them and black men exploiting their wombs, resources, time, and sanity. 

Meanwhile, black women of every level of class and education are under the spell of the hustle to control and masculinize. Desiring the basics that other races of women commonly enjoy is gold-digging behavior on ours. From Dr. Portia with a doctorate to LaQueesha from the hood, we are all victimes of the hustle. While we fret over being “fetished,” black women have the highest rates of domestic violence, death by homocide while pregnant, sexual and physical abuse of little girls and women, fatal encounters of street harassment, high out of wedlock rates and paternal abandonment, low marriage rates and high divorce rates, colorism, all within our OWN community.

All of these things happening, and we have been brainwashed to ignore them in favor of fearing more from the outside than what’s going on right in front of us.

Take a listen to our interview:

https://youtu.be/8VlVbm6pKrM

Follow Christelyn on Instagram and Twitter, and subscribe to our YouTube channel. And if you want to be a little more about this online dating thing, InterracialDatingCentral is the official dating site for this blog

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How I Unwittingly Discovered a Nigerian Hacking Cartel, and How I Know You’re Not Safe. http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/unwittingly-discovered-nigerian-hacking-cartel-know-youre-not-safe/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/unwittingly-discovered-nigerian-hacking-cartel-know-youre-not-safe/#comments Tue, 12 Dec 2017 22:05:20 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=43656 It all started when I began actively seeking men for our secret group, Beyond Black & White Singles. I went to financial and investment pages and joined them, in hopes get great guys for my amazing girls. I thought it would be harmless. Bat my eyes at a few of the single guys and recruit […]

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It all started when I began actively seeking men for our secret group, Beyond Black & White Singles. I went to financial and investment pages and joined them, in hopes get great guys for my amazing girls. I thought it would be harmless. Bat my eyes at a few of the single guys and recruit them for our group, and learn some stock tips. Win win.

Little did I know there was an entire cartel of gang members working to scam the members of such groups and bilk them for hundreds, even thousands of dollars. As I started meeting men–some real, and as I would later discover, some fake–I noticed a pattern. All the incredible looking guys I saw had their relationship status as “widowed.”

Now granted, it is a possibility that young men who married can lose their wives. But I saw a SUPER high concentration of men in certain financial circles claiming this status. It’s a statistical impossibility for the amount of men I encountered to all be widowed. For example, out of 10 men I would review, two or three would say they are widowed. Unless there’s a mass rampage of hot guys murdering their loving wives, I’m just not buying it.

And then one of my close girlfriends got enmeshed with a “widowed” man named Pedro who claimed to be rich, powerful, kind, widowed, and looking for a mother for his young children. He also preyed upon her firm religious commitment to Catholicism, and appeared to be everything she was looking for. Sociopaths study their prey.

I thought he was amazing too. But just to be cautious, I advised her to get a background check on this man, which checked out. Not only was he loaded, but he was a government official. I was so incredibly happy for her. It was a whirlwind–he swept her off her feet, and told her she was everything he’d ever wanted. She felt the same. They were talking about making a life together. Until one of my contacts discovered that the man who my friend was engaging with was either cat fishing or cheating on her wife, and gave me the link to the REAL man’s Instagram.

What I found shocked me to my core. Turn’s out the man’s wife was VERY much alive. He was being impersonated by a Nigerian 20-something who is part of a gang of men who actively work to bilk unsuspecting people out of their money.

In this particular case, the hacker knows “Real Pedro” and took on his identity when he was rejected for a job. Once the jig was up, he spilled all the beans.

 

Yes; he noticed that I informed the “REAL Pedro” he was being impersonated, because this man has completely hacked his account. We have warned “Real Pedro” but so far, we haven’t heard confirmation that he’s taking any action. Although he’d better.

Here’s what FAKE Pedro had in store for my friend. He initially planned to extort her.

 

Come to find out this imposter is a graduate of the University of Nigeria. I found out because I inadvertently recruited one of his partners, who spilled this entire tea. I’m keeping (his fake name) anonymous, but will be reporting his profile. He informed me that they BOTH attended the university (University of Nigeria) and are on the same team of hackers/scammers, and the rabbit hole goes deeper than you could ever imagine.

The men I found through the financial pages claim “widowed” relationship status because it keeps away meddling questions and elicits sympathy. My contact told me that he infiltrates financial pages to get people to invest small amounts of money (around $500) in order to rob unsuspecting investors of their capital. They poach photos off of Instagram, and often use white people to con Americans.

I did a cross check of the men and then looked at their friends (that didn’t show) but who LIKED their posts. OMG..look…does this name look familiar?

When I asked him how big the network ways, he simply said, “More than you can imagine. No one in social media is safe.”

At the time of this post, Facebook allowed for the imposter to use his name, career, everything, and as of this report, they have done NOTHING to remove this imposter from their platform, despite many of us reporting it.

This is the fault of Facebook. They do nothing about the voluminous amounts of fake profiles on their site, preying on innocent men and women.

So…why do you think the Powers That Be in the country are downplaying the real risk of all of this? Why are there more safeguards? Where are all the articles and warnings?

Because if we really knew how unsafe we all were, none of us would use social media at all–at least those of us with half a brain. And once the information dried up, so would their money. They’re counting on you to believe that this is just a random, spotty occurrence, when in fact, these people are among us freely and no one is safe.

My account was hacked just last week. A company used my account to pay for ads to the tune of $300. Luckily I was able to get it reversed, but I’m not naive enough to think it’s an isolated incidence. Wake up people. Stop being so naive. If you think you’re safe, you’re probably being hacked right now. They’re counting on your ego and hubris.

So how can you tell if an account is fake? The imposters become more sophisticated as time goes on, but your best bet is to cross check their friends, and be suspicious if they don’t show you how many “friends” they have. I discovered the cartel of scammers by looking at the people LIKING their posts and replying, and cross checking their profiles. In order to try to make their profiles look more authentic, they will enlist their gang of thugs to reply, further lending credibility to the profile. 

 

It’s all connected, folks.

This conspiracy is bigger than any in our government want to admit. Because if the veil is removed, we realize there is no safety, and if people en masse withdraw from all the social media and electronic everything, the economy would collapse. If we really knew how truly vulnerable we were, companies like Facebook, Twitter, and Amazon would go out of business. That’s billions of dollars in revenue that count on both your ignorance and your trust.

If I were to offer an opinion, I think that the narrative up until this point trying to caution the public about predators online and leaving the onus or all responsibility to the common people has absolved the organizations who are making BILLIONS OF DOLLARS exploiting us. There is no really culpability for them. And as we are robbed blind, of our emotions or money, they do the Kanye shrug and tell us we should have known better.

Are you okay with this? I know I’m not.

 

Follow Christelyn on Instagram and Twitter, and subscribe to our You Tube channel. And if you want to be a little more about this online dating thing, InterracialDatingCentral is the official dating site for this blog

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Whoa…@The Reviews for Online Dating: Decoded 😳 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/whoa-reviews-online-dating-decoded-%f0%9f%98%b3/ Tue, 29 Aug 2017 00:16:40 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=43160 We had our first telephone seminar on Sunday and to say it was amazing would be an understatement. Nearly three hours packed with information, expert advice, and even a few laughs. Here’s what some participants had to say: Christelyn I just wanted to thank you for hosting the seminar last night…it was absolutely awesome!  I […]

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We had our first telephone seminar on Sunday and to say it was amazing would be an understatement. Nearly three hours packed with information, expert advice, and even a few laughs. Here’s what some participants had to say:

Christelyn I just wanted to thank you for hosting the seminar last night…it was absolutely awesome!  I learned so much and am excited to put into practice all of the tips shared by you and the other presenters. I had just about given up on online dating but now I’m charged to try again and am filled with a new hope that it could work for me. Also, it was encouraging to know other women over 40 are on a similar journey as myself. –Kelly

Ladies! I was just in Christelyn’s “Online Dating: Decoded” webinar & it was 3h 45m worth of invaluable information. She really wants us black women to WIN. If there’s another in the future, I highly recommend you participate. –Adrienne

It was awesome, insightful with a plethora of information. I was really clueless about online dating. After this I am excited and more comfortable and confident about restarting my online dating journey.. thank you Christelyn.. p.s. all of the guests were fantastic!!–Virgina

The seminar was such a success I’ve put the entire event on online with a bonus! Online Dating: Glamorously is finished, and I’m giving it away FREE in this series!

If that weren’t enough to entice you, Online Dating: Decoded features experts who provided tons of valuable information.

For one day, get expert advice on how to jumpstart your online dating profile and start attracting the high-quality men you deserve. No lame, obscure theory. Real tips to get you started immediately!

Damona Hoffman, certified dating coach, Host/Producer, Dates & Mates on iHeart Radio & UBN Radio, and co-host of A Question of Love on FYI TV and former co-host of #BlackLove. Damona and Christelyn will discuss the unique challenges black women face online, and how to “beat” the online dating algorithm to get more visibility.

Kevin Murray, CEO and co-founder of Icebrkr, an online dating service that uses artificial intelligence to give daters real-time advice while they are creating their profile and conversing with others on the site. As a former professional online profile ghostwriter for eFlirt, Kevin will give insight into the words and phrases that will get you the attention you want, along with tips on instant messaging

Twin brothers David and Jonathan Bennett are internationally recognized dating, relationship, and life coaches based out of the Columbus, Ohio metro area, where they consult, speak, and offer classes. Together they will discuss:

-How you can choose photos that express your core personality, not just your looks

-Ways to “make the first move” and message a guy without coming across too strongly

-Major red flag phrases that cause guys to instantly reject a profile (and how to avoid them)

-Tips to express your values and preferences in a way that draws in quality people

-Advice to positively stand out and not be just another boring profile

THIS ISN’T THE SAME OLD, SAME OLD. REAL ADVICE. FOR REAL.

 

 

Trust me…I’ve done the research. A coaching of this type STARTS at $150, and goes up into the thousands. And for the price of a good pair of shoes, you’ll have more information, insightful and SPECIFIC TO BLACK WOMEN that you can use and start with IMMEDIATELY.

So what are you waiting for? Click here to sign up and get your copy of my first book since 2012!

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Check Out Our Interview with the Parents of the Adorable McClure Twins! http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/check-interview-parents-adorable-mcclure-twins/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/check-interview-parents-adorable-mcclure-twins/#comments Sun, 04 Dec 2016 05:59:44 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=41693 I had an amazing conversation with Justin and Ami McClure, the parents of the completely adorable and precocious McClure twins, that seem to be taking the world by storm. They were most recently on Good Morning America. Some are predicting they’ll be the next “Tia and Tamera.” But what of the people who created these […]

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I had an amazing conversation with Justin and Ami McClure, the parents of the completely adorable and precocious McClure twins, that seem to be taking the world by storm. They were most recently on Good Morning America. Some are predicting they’ll be the next “Tia and Tamera.”

But what of the people who created these two? They’ve got an interesting story as well. They met in New York when Ami was reportedly doing a terrible job parallel parking. She was getting cat called by a guy and Justin swooped in to snatch her away. He said, “Just pretend you’re with me.” They walked off together and the rest was history.

Check out our interview. Justin is quite the straight shooter!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJwMf6tvplM

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Exclusive: “Bride and Prejudice Interracial Couple Clash with Family http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/exclusive-bride-and-prejudice-interracial-couple-clash-with-family/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/exclusive-bride-and-prejudice-interracial-couple-clash-with-family/#comments Tue, 29 Mar 2016 05:29:42 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=39884 Adam ,35,and Briana ,24,met on Plenty of Fish two years ago and are now engaged to be married in August. She’s African American and Spanish and he’s German, Irish and Cherokee. But not everyone is happy with their union, which is why they are a featured couple on FYI’s Bride and Prejudice, a show that […]

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Adam ,35,and Briana ,24,met on Plenty of Fish two years ago and are now engaged to be married in August. She’s African American and Spanish and he’s German, Irish and Cherokee. But not everyone is happy with their union, which is why they are a featured couple on FYI’s Bride and Prejudice, a show that follows three unorthodox couples as they navigate telling their loved ones of their choice in mate.

Adam’s opposition comes from his father, who always felt uncomfortable with Adam’s preference for black women. “I remember being a kid and watching Whitney Houston on television and thought…I really want that,” he said. He’s had to keep his dating life “under raps,” but with the impending nuptials, all must come to light.

Britney, Adam, and his 13 year-old daughter from a previous relationship.

Britney, Adam, and his 13 year-old daughter from a previous relationship.

Briana is also facing opposition to her choice in marriage partner by her cousin, Ashlen. For her, the problem is cut and dry: he’s not black, so he’s not where it’s at. While single herself, Ashlen is trying to convince Briana that she should be with a tall, handsome black man…you know…like the guy she herself doesn’t have. “I was really scared to tell my family we met online, and that he was white,” says Briana.

I find Briana’s cousin’s stance a little puzzling, because looking at both women, it’s clear they have some non-black ancestry. Ashlyn is a strict “one drop rule” follower, it seems.

 

As what seems typical, the men in Briana’s family date interracially with no social consequences, while she wrings her hands about how to get enough courage to take him to the annual family barbecue.

Despite these challenges, the couple remains hopeful and present a unified front to family members who oppose them. “As long as you have love, all can be overcome,” says Adam.

Bride and Prejudice comes on tonight, March 29 on FYI at 10/9 Central.

 

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BB&W Exclusive: “Empire” Makeup Artist Unveils Ultimate Foundation; Tips for Us! http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/bb-tips-for-us/ http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/bb-tips-for-us/#comments Thu, 02 Apr 2015 04:12:19 +0000 http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/?p=36703 Boy, do I have a treat for you. Last weekend at The Makeup Show Los Angeles, I stumbled upon a dynamic and charismatic makeup artist giving a tutorial on contouring. This artist was the renowned Ashunta Sherrif, and she’s done the faces of some of our favorite African American celebrities, including Meagan Good, Taraji P. Henson, […]

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Boy, do I have a treat for you. Last weekend at The Makeup Show Los Angeles, I stumbled upon a dynamic and charismatic makeup artist giving a tutorial on contouring. This artist was the renowned Ashunta Sherrif, and she’s done the faces of some of our favorite African American celebrities, including Meagan Good, Taraji P. Henson, Tracee Ellis Ross, Elle Varner, Alicia Keys, Jordin Sparks, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, Sanaa Lathan, Tika Sumpter, La LA Anthony, Sharon Stone, Marisa Tomei, Rihanna, Ciara, Hillary Duff, Ashley Simpson, Keri Hilson, Jazmine Sullivan, India Arie and many many more. These days, she’s in charge of the entire editorial and marketing/promo on the runaway hit, Empire. Yes. She does all of Taraji P. Henson’s looks. So when she showcased her line of foundation/concealer/contour a la Perfect Face Dual Foundation, I was intrigued.

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First thing I’d noticed was that her demo class at the show was packed to the hilt–make up artists from all around sat in rapt attention as she shared her quick-yet-precise routine to get stars ready for the screen and models ready for glossies.

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When I told Ashunta about the crowd over here at Beyond Black & White, she wanted to be sure all of us knew how amazing Perfect Face was, so she was gracious enough to give me the product to review myself. And…wow. Okay; I’m going to work backwards and show you the finished product just to make you drool…

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Yes, girl. Foundation looks like butta-baby. Goes on that way too. Perfect Face is a dual shade foundation that acts as such, but does the job of a concealer and contour product so you get it all in one easy stick without all the extra. Coming from a chick like me who just spend a fortune on contouring products to give me this effect, my search is absolutely over. She personally selected DARK for me. The line come in six shades. One side is a few shade lighter, the other is a shade or two darker.

The after application your skin looks dewy and fresh. The downside? You definitely need a mattifying powder if you’re super oily, because the effect might be a bit much. I ended up putting extra powder to set the foundation in my T-zone.

Dark

 

With a little practice and a good foundation brush (included in your purchase) you can easily master this look and have it done and set in five minutes. Heck; I did it on the first try, and did a video tutorial of the process…

I also got a chance to speak with Ashunta about her favorite go-to products, and you can listen to it here:

List of Ashunta’s favorite go-to products…

Dior CC face primer

Dermablend Translucent Setting Powder

Prefers INGLOT blushes or Pur Mineral blushes

Lime Crime lips for matte, retro look or for glossy, Dior Addict Lip Glow

Eyebrows Damone Roberts

Dior Addict Mascara

Skindavia Setting Spray

 

You can also find tons of tutorials and more product information at ashuntasheriffbeauty.com. See the product in action on Instagram on both @ashuntasheriff and @ashuntasheriffbeauty.

$40 for the Perfect Blend stick; $15 for the Perfect Blend brush  or get both for $50 at ashuntasheriffbeauty.com.

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