You may or may not have heard of the singer Ciara, if you didn’t, don’t be alarmed. She’s known in Hip Hop to be the muse of Missy Elliot who rose to fame after the untimely death of the singer Aaliyah in 2001. Ciara was quietly tied as the romantic partner of rapper 50 Cent, and Bow Wow, and has been dating the rapper Future who proposed to her in October of 2013 with a 15 karat diamond ring. She just confirmed rumors of her pregnancy this week on the television show The View.
This is all fine and good and I wish Ciara the best of luck in her personal endeavors, but I just can’t get too excited over an engagement to a man that already has a couple of children born to him by random woman. He was pulled into family court to address the allegations against him for having fathered a child years ago.
Future — aka Nayvadius Cash — was sued last year by Jessica Smith — who claimed the rapper knocked her up in 2001 … but should be ordered to pay her child support.
As TMZ first reported, Future (real name Nayvadius Cash) and baby mama Jessica Smith hammered out a child support agreement after a DNA test proved Future was the daddy of Smith’s 10-year-old boy. But Smith came back a short while later demanding more money because she felt Future lied about how much money he makes. [Source: TMZ]
In addition to this recently revealed child, Future also has an addition child, and mother seeking child support who filed her paperwork in court during summer of 2013.
TMZ broke the story … a woman named Brittni Mealy slapped Future with a paternity lawsuit back in Feb, claiming he was the father of her son. But a month later she dismissed the suit, without explanation.
Then on June 8th, Future filed docs, admitting he knocked Brittni up and asked the court to make it official … by legally recognizing him as the father. He also wants joint custody and for the court to determine how much child support he should pay.
Brittni then fired back with docs of her own, claiming it’s not enough. She says Future left his kid without support for months. She’s asking for that cash — specifically from June and July — plus future support. [Source: TMZ]
So Ciara, who is a beautiful woman, will join the ranks of
two three other women as a mother to the offspring of a man who needs to be informed of the children that he’s created. And I’ll apply culpability to both sides, because you can’t tell me how one person did wrong without me wondering how things didn’t progress in unison, so the mother’s of these children are just as guilty. If you sleep with a rapper, or any man, that gives his unbridled love away to whomever sits still long enough then I paint you with a distasteful brush, also, homegirl.
My sister, she took a picture with my kid’s mother. My sister was in the picture and [they said], ‘It’s one of his five baby mamas.’ Everybody thinks I got five baby mamas. [I have] three.
I have three kids. My son, he’s eleven. My little girl, she’s four. I have a one-year-old. My boy Prince. [Source]
My question is, why is it okay for a woman to become the ‘chosen one’ to a man that appears to have issues with the manner in which he interacts and supports the children he already has?
What would cause a woman, who is beautiful, and exposed to celebrity (shout out to Eve) decide to saddle up with a man that’s already got two marks against his bank account? I’m sure there were PLENTY of men who she could have dated. I know 50 Cent is very protective of his personal life, and he’s also a shrewd business man that keeps a keen eye on his finances, so he isn’t pressed to get married, but I’m sure 50 is one of many men in a certain economic/social circle whom she has access to. She could have and should have chosen wiser.
I don’t know, I have friends who happily bear children with men who have multiple baby momma’s even though is seems counterproductive to me to have to share the income of my partner with responsibilities outside the home. I’m not great at math but I did realize that too many people with their hand out on payday meant less money for he and I, and my own child that needed taking care of.
Some say the men show themselves to be great dads, and that may be true, but the argument only really works when the man has a substantial income. You know, enough to cover the cost of doing business if he wants a gang of offspring, and a gang of kids is often how a man shows his sexual prowess, whether or not he can actively (read: full time) father those kids is a different story. Powerful, rich and successful men are a great catch, but power, wealth and success are also full time demanding endeavors, be he a high priced attorney or a b rated rapper.
But regardless of how much money he makes, a man with multiple children also shares his personal life with those kids, Daddy divided times x equals less.
You do the math…
If you are the wife, and decide to have a child with a man with outside children, then you do realize that he will split his time and money between the other family. Or best case scenario, you get to be the full time mother to his other demon seeds, who may or may not be on par with the quality of parenting you are trying to maintain with your own child.
Either way, makes no sense to me, but hey, she got the ring, and a baby bump, so congrats on all of that.
Let’s give it up for progress in parenting for the urban folks, shall we? What do you think? Will they make it the alter, and if so, can this harem of baby mothers work it all out?