Fresh Press: Red States Top List for Online Daters Looking for Interracial Love

Fresh Press: Red States Top List for Online Daters Looking for Interracial Love

According to InterracialDating.com, 10 of the top 20 states in most demand for online interracial dating services are historically red states.

Author : Christelyn Karazin

Author's Website | Articles from

As per usual, the 2012 election heats up to a frenzy as the country is divided between red and blue states, conservative and liberal. But the personal may not always be the political, based on recent data released by InterracialDating.com, an online dating service that specializes in connecting people who choose “character above color.” It turns out that some of the reddest of red states have the highest number seeking interracial relationships. Ten out of the site’s top 20 states with the most populous members have historically voted Republican over the past five presidential elections.

States like Texas, Georgia, Tennessee, Alabama, South Carolina, Louisiana and Indiana historically vote Republican and tend to be socially conservative–not exactly fertile ground for people openly and un-apologetically stating their non-conformist dating preferences. Most of these states vehemently opposed interracial marriage during the riotous Civil Rights era, with Alabama, the last holdout, formally legalizing it as late as the year 2000. “The high interest in interracial dating might be a surprise because of a perceived disapproval of interracial relationships in the Deep South where racial tensions seem deeply ingrained in the psyche and culture of the people who live there,” says Christelyn D. Karazin, co-author of “Swirling: How to Date, Mate, and Relate, Mixing Race, Culture and Creed,” and publisher for the popular interracial dating blog, Beyond Black & White.

Karazin recently appeared on CNN’s “HLN Weekend Express with Natasha Curry” discussing historically “swirl-friendly” areas most accepting of interracial couples. Predictably, these places were along typically liberal coastal cities like Los Angeles, New York, and Seattle with pockets of swirl-friendly places in the Midwest and the western portion of Texas.

So are people in red states too socially conservative to widely accept interracial relationships?

Laura Noble, 46, a black woman who lives in Virginia (Number 8 on the list) says, “As a black conservative, I posit that the media has a vested interest in portraying all conservatives as racists and all liberals as open-minded when in my experience, that is not the truth. I think that many conservatives are stereo-typically misrepresented in their interest of other races, and their geographic location may be more racially homogeneous, therefore if they want to date outside their race, they need to do it online.”

This new data may indicate that there’s a higher interest in interracial dating in red states than is perceived on the surface because of it’s anonymity and ubiquitousness. “The demand is there because it might be harder for people to gauge who might be open to dating interracially,” says Rob Thompson, founder of InterracialDating.com. “Online dating gives people the ability to seek out like-minded people more easily than it would be face to face.”

Shaun Brown, 26, of Richmond, Virginia, plans to vote for Mitt Romney on November 6. He’s white, his girlfriend is black. Brown thinks that the legacy of slavery, fear and mistrust keeps people in Southern (and historically red) states from openly expressing their interest in interracial dating. “The media narrative for the past 40-50 years is that all conservatives care about themselves and their white friends and don’t like black people. We’re drilled from grade school and beyond that as a white person, your people oppressed black people. It makes you a bit reluctant to approach a woman for fear that you might be rejected. With online dating, you don’t have that fear or anxiety of wondering if you ask a girl out on a date she would say, ‘Oh no I could never date you because you’re white.”

*State rankings based on member registrations since 2008.

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zabeth 817 pts

One person will say how they had a great experience in one city and then the next person will chime in about how completely different their experience was. Maybe there is no one best place to swirl, maybe you just have to make the most of it wherever you are? 

somethingdifferent22 354 pts

Hmm you know what I think? I'd like to see a map with just BW/WM specifically or BW any other race. I can definitely say living in NYC this has got to be the biggest swirl capital I've ever seen in the US for BW/WM but when I was in California for online dating over the summer there was a lot less interest (At least where I'm from in Northern California) but then again I've been only dating outside of my race my entire life and while it's hard sometimes and you find the ones who only date exclusively in their race (especially with asian guys) most of the time there are plenty of WM willing to look past that. But I swear most of the interracial couples are WM/AW and WM/MW or BM/WW or BM/MW it's rarely black woman swirling from what I have seen.  WE GOTTA CHANGE THAT :D

SirLoinDeBeef 2528 pts

Having lived out in the Southwest (Albuquerque, Santa Fe & Espanola) for some years, I have some interesting information concerning racial and ethnic distinctions.

There are only three ethnic groups out there:  Indio ... hispanic ... and anglo.

I am an anglo - the Senegalese-dark AA BW is an anglo - the Hmong people are anglos - the milk-white Scots/Irish are anglos - my Brenda would be an anglo.

I suppose that it kinda simplifies things.

VictoriaAntoine 436 pts

What not even Massachusetts! I Need to Move!

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 VictoriaAntoine

 LOL! I know whatcha mean. Not only for that, but for other reasons too.

VictoriaAntoine 436 pts

 AminahMatthews  The only reason I could think of is Massachusetts are very clicky ( people date within their own race) and most non black man perfer european standand of beauty. Massachusetts is a best place to go to school but not to date or career depends on what career you are going for. I am moving out of state and Move in to NYC because NY is the best place to be when it comes to interracial dating and also very open minded people.

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 VictoriaAntoine I read somewhere that Massachusetts have some of the most racist A-holes up there. And for some reason I thought New England was the total opposite. I guess Vermont, Conn, New Ham, and Maine are no exception either.

 

Maxine 1005 pts

 AminahMatthews  VictoriaAntoine I've only heard that about Boston.  I've heard it's the most openly racist (against blacks) city in the nation.  I think Vermont, New Hampshire, and Maine are completely different.  They're some of the whitest states in the country, but the people have a liberal/independent streak.  There is not the historical clash with minorities or scrapping for working class jobs (like when the Irish left Europe for Boston  and had to compete with blacks who'd left the South).  

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 Maxine What about Connecticut?

 
Maxine 1005 pts

 AminahMatthews Connecticut has a reputation of being very WASPy but more monied, not as liberal/hippie as Vermont.  Last time I checked, CT had the highest income of any state in America.  VT and NH are mostly rural, with even their cities having a small population. CT cities don't have huge populations either, but I do think of them as  more urban.  Well at least New Haven, where Yale is.  The city is 1/3 black with a good proportion of Asians and Latinos too.

SirLoinDeBeef 2528 pts

There is a distressing tendency among humans to look at one aspect of a person (such as personal politics) and assign ALL other views to that one observation.

So, I am politically independent ... financially conservative ... socially liberal.

But, suppose I lived in a RED state ... it is likely that I would be pre-judged to be a deep, fundamentalist conservative.

Sigh!

Law Wanxi 5812 pts

 SirLoinDeBeef 

How did the two parties get their colour assignments? You've been around a while and know a lot of stuff; can you explain it for me, please?

 

DWB 7687 pts

 Law Wanxi  SirLoinDeBeef Yea, they are backwards (and you know exactly why the Democrats should be the red states) ... as to why the switch, the media doesn't believe truth in advertising???

zipporah 1730 pts

@DWB @Law Wanxi @SirLoinDeBeef Not only are they 'backwards' in color, the STARS on the elephant are 'upside down' as well---LOL

SirLoinDeBeef 2528 pts

 Law Wanxi I don't even know why it's pink for girls and blue for boys - back 100 years ago, it was just the other way around.

Possibly something to do with money.

Maxine 1005 pts

 SirLoinDeBeef  Law Wanxi It wasn't anything the parties themselves created.  The cable news networks simply needed a way to color code their maps during election season.  It was arbitrary.

zabeth 817 pts

Republican does not automatically equal racist. People really need to get over that.  

zipporah 1730 pts

@zabeth Many,republican, or conservative WM arent even racist AT ALL., and sometimes the liberal democrats could be more anti black, etc...

Tammy_Ghalden 870 pts

Is this just a straight up count or is this per capita? The states listed just happen to be the most populous.

eugeniaberg 7245 pts moderator

Oh this for interracial online dating, it's interesting though. But I've been saying this for years, folks everywhere are interested in dating across racial lines. The spot where you live may or may not matter but what matters more than anything is YOU. Washington isn't even repped on here but I go by my eyes not just stats which can skewed all kinds of ways. I think someone is right who said this below it may be b/c in many of these places there is a large blk population. I'm here to tell you there is not one here in Washington. But I'm not really sure what type of interracial relationship these participants are looking for. So the gist should be wherever you go there you are, get yourself out there, wherever you live and be the best damn YOU you can be. Then it won't matter where you are, you'll find someone. Every different source you go to this information changes, if you want to move, move b/c you want to not to get a date.

heyimPearlilikefries 2091 pts

"Most of these states vehemently opposed interracial marriage during the riotous Civil Rights era, with Alabama, the last holdout, formally legalizing it as late as the year 2000."

 

What! KMA!

 

There's so many contradictions in the liberal (especially you guys) and conservative parities. Those labels along with 'loyal Democrat' and Republican means little to nothing. Labels are overrated. 

Statuesque 1749 pts

My boyfriend is from a red state in the rural west.  Lots of fresh faced leggy blond people walking around. When I visited his (SMALL) hometown, though, I saw two other WM/BF couples, a handful of WM/AW couples and about 3-4 BM/WW couples. Admittedly, most of these couples seemed to be affiliated with the local university rather than townies. We got some admiring looks and a couple of stares, but no hostility.

 

There is a misconception that White men from rural areas or red states aren't open to IRR.  I think it is more a consequence of very little exposure to ethnic diversity...Black women just aren't on their radar because they aren't any around.  Add in conservative politics and most are judged not to have much in common with the average Black woman.

 

What I have found with my boyfriend is that he is conservative politically but we share a live and let live philosophy.  All it took was exposure to Black women for him to add them to the pool of consideration.  A lot of people are surprised we are together when they find out where he is from, because the stereotype is that White men from urban areas or who are politically liberal are more open to IRR.  The only White guy I've ever dated who fits that bill is a European.

zipporah 1730 pts

@Statuesque Many WM are Not OPEN to IRR just because they are urban liberals, unless its for a 'fetish'. Thats where IMO the fetishism comes from--and yes, some rural conservative WM are more open to marrying and starting families with BW

Statuesque 1749 pts

 zipporah  Statuesque I don't know...this "fetish" has a shelf life much older than modern liberalism in American culture, and it certainly was more prevalent in the agricultural South where Blacks and Whites had more direct social contact.  My point was simply that the traditional stereotypes belie the reality, which is where a person is from does not indicate how racist a person may be, or whether this person would consider a IRR.  Lots of liberal city boys are too concerned about what people think.  They may support IRR in principle but fall down on the job when it is time to stand by their woman.  That's a stereotype that doesn't get a lot of air time.  It's always about the finger pointing at the guys who like country music, hunt and drive trucks who couldn't POSSIBLY be attracted to BW! Lest we forget: wasn't Mr. Loving just such a guy?  

 

ironcowboy 324 pts

Now this is interesting article… 

 

I lived in CA and was in an interracial relationship there, and a HUGE % of the situation there was white/Hispanic, or white/Asian.  In most cases it was white male and Asian or Hispanic female.  Cali really is a cultural melting pot, at least SoCal anyway!  You also saw a lot of BM/WF… on a rare occasion one observed WM/BF… but I confess it did not live in the Watts area of LA. 

 

On a funny side note… I did get lost once and wound up in the Watts area once, driving a nice Lexus, with an Asian woman in tow… I still laugh about that misadventure… that was really out of place and intrinsically funny… My Asian girlfriend did not laugh about it, nor did she permit me to ask for directions back to the interstate… nor did she allow me to even stop at red stop lights.  I still smile about that day…

 

I’ve lived in Texas too, and outside of the city centers you see white man / Hispanic girl as the norm.  I never lived in any cities there… I’m pretty much a field mouse.

 

Now I live in Indiana and I love my fiancé (BW) with a deep passion!  She is amazing!

 

Just because a state is not mentioned on the map does not mean there are no prospects… nor does it necessarily mean it’s a ‘racist’ or ‘not-a-racist’ place.  Technically there is more racism as ‘defined’ in NY and CA then in Mississippi… this is simply a raw numbers game… NY and CA have about 20% of the entire US population between them, so you will have more racial incidents per capita in those two states.   My girl reports experiencing more racism in JY, than here in Indiana… in other words you can find racists just about anywhere you look.

 

I must say that I even discovered a WM/BW in North Dakota… on both the east and west sides, and in Montana too… I lived everywhere man, I’ve lived everywhere… JK

 

PS I met my girl on Match.com, and it was great!    Did I mention she is AWESOME! 

Tammy_Ghalden 870 pts

@CortlandCarrington Mississippi and Montana have the most hate groups per capita.

zipporah 1730 pts

@Tammy_Ghalden I thought it was IDAHO more than Montana---Mississippi? who cares about that state anyway---LOL

VintageNarcissa 3151 pts

 CortlandCarrington My boyfriend is a Marine vet who was stationed in Jacksonville, NC. He always tells me stories about how he and his fellow Marines developed a theory (at least as per opinions on their base) that the black Marines were most interested in white girls, the white Marines were most interested in Hispanic girls and the Hispanic Marines were most interested in black girls. 

 

mdiva2002 250 pts

 VintageNarcissa  CortlandCarrington I wonder what it is for Asian Marine? I had one interested in me unfortunately I was dating someone at the time. 

Toni_M 18982 pts moderator

I see we have some naysayers. Ladies, you are making the mistake of looking at the OFFLINE aspect of your personal experiences. This is about ONLINE experiences. These are very different.

 

For one thing, the digital world allows people to pick and choose exactly who they want to interact with, as Christelyn  said,  "from the comfort of their own home". 

 

It could very well be that you've found yourself in an area that's not swirl friendly. Which may explain just why these places are on the list: What black woman is going to expect a white guy in a "racist" location to approach her? What white guy in a place where black women are highly suspicious of them, and prone to reject them is going to approach them outright?

 

If you do things online (via a site EXCLUSIVELY for interracial dating), you'll have an easier time navigating those same places digitally than you would in actuality.

 

 

It's not about what you're seeing in your day to day life. A lot is changing, and not all of that change is in the non-digital world.

 

ironcowboy 324 pts

Toni_MChristelyn

Match.com worked for us…  But, It’s surprising how many people mistake online dating as a vehicle to better or faster relationships.  On line dating (meeting on line) is great, but the dating part still remains to be done… and one must still sort through hundreds of non-compatibles, just like in real live… you know how Murphy in accounting just annoys you, and you would never date him in a million years!

 

In some ways finding people on line is actually much more difficult… as one meets more people, and this requires more time to sort through the more people who don’t resonate well with you.  But one must go on dates to learn these things about people.  It can be challenging to meet people on line… for example, I know there are people here on this site who think I’m a horses a$$… that’s OK… but they don’t know that I’d be the guy who gets soaked to the bone on the side of the road on that dark and rainy night changing their flat tire. 

 

But… on-line is a solid GOLD for locating people who are open to you for who you are, and not barring you for the color of your skin.  As Toni_M indicates, a lot is changing… and the internet is the spear tip of that change…

Tammy_Ghalden 870 pts

There is a very simple explanation for this. These states have the highest black populations. It's all about exposure. The number of white men looking to date black women is relatively high in areas like Dallas and Houston because they have grown up around black people and work with them. On the other hand, white men in South Texas (where I live unfortunately) will date a polka dotted woman before they date a black woman. They act like black women are aliens. Why isn't Mississippi on the list? As always, Mississippi is a special case. It is one of the most racist and backward states in the Union.

Tammy_Ghalden 870 pts

I forgot to add that just because these areas are friendly to interracial dating does not mean they are great places for black women to find non-black men. White/Hispanic and white/Asian probably make up a bulk of the interest. WF/BM interest probably makes up most of the rest. I've also seen a lot of BM/HF relationships in Texas.

vthewriter 266 pts

 Tammy_Ghalden I think that has a lot to do with it. I met my wife in a southern city that is 40-50% black. It made no sense to me to exclude 40-50% of the eligible dating population. Also, when you have such large black populations that are involved in every aspect of everyday life, it makes it harder to pigeonhole an entire race into a monolithic stereotype. Of course you see color, but you see the person, too.

 

I'm also going to throw the issue of Southern Culture out there. There's a difference between northern and southern culture. My wife had her experiences up North, and she would rather hang around white people from down south than black people from up north. All her black friends up north were either from Africa or the Caribbean. I don't think I can repeat her observations without offending many people.

 

Had another friend from Brooklyn. Black male. Lawyer. Relocated to Atlanta. He said that he prefers the south as well, going so far as to claim it's less racist than the north. From his perspective, you never knew who was racist up north. Everyone smiled at you and shook your hand; you just had to always be aware of who might stab you in the back. Down south, if someone is racist then they'll let you know. If they give no indication of being racist, chances are they aren't. 

 

Of course, it's not perfect everywhere down here, just as not all northerners are DBR. It's just that the south is not the backwards, racist, redneck wonderland that the rest of the U.S. thinks it is. To put a little spin of irony on it: the U.S. is surprised that the stereotypical close-minded southerner doesn't fit into their close-minded stereotype.

iHeartLove 804 pts

 vthewriter  Tammy_Ghalden "He said that he prefers the south as well, going so far as to claim it's less racist than the north. From his perspective, you never knew who was racist up north. Everyone smiled at you and shook your hand; you just had to always be aware of who might stab you in the back. "

 

Funny. That's my impression of Southern hospitality from strangers (not from friends). But I'm a Northeastern city girl, tried and true...

AminahMatthews 545 pts

And here in NC, it seems as tho white males prefer their own. I don't know and I can't tell if they're interested in IRR's or not. Some are very kind and sweet. And then there are those who are down right racist.  I am  attracted to white men. Have been all my life. But to scared and nervous to go for it without being suspious of white men HERE  in NC. I'm scared of undercover racist too.  I have caught WM eyeballing me, my sister and my friend. Then look away as if they werent looking. lol. Some are usaually in a relationship anyway when they do this...

Christelyn 8896 pts moderator

 AminahMatthews But from what the data appears to show is that many of these people might be looking to connect with someone of the same race within the comfort, privacy and anonymity of their own homes.

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 Christelyn

 Hi Chris! I hope you don't mind me calling you Chris. I love the book. Keep up the good work and tell Mattew Hussey love the advice he gives and he's gorgeous. :D

 

Oh, BTW, I got it now with the data. Thanks.

Christelyn 8896 pts moderator

 AminahMatthews Of course I don't mind you calling me Chris! We're family here!

 

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 Brenda55

 Brenda, thanks for thedaileybeast website. It looks like another good site to be on.

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 Brenda55

 ...and Kristina doesnt know what she's doing. I don't believe in this relationship for some reason. This whole family didn't waste no time getting in the spotlight after Whitney died. Its all about money. First this engagement, now a REALITY SHOW? You hear about that?

The Working Home Keeper 6639 pts

 AminahMatthews I think it's a matter of where you are in NC and individual experiences.  I've lived in NC my entire life as well.  I've always been interested in white men and when single dated white men exclusively.  I've been married to my husband (who is white) for 12 years (we met in college).  Even though I'm very happily married, I still get approached by white men.  And in our area, most of the IRR I see are BW/WM.  So, don't get discouraged!

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 The Working Home Keeper

 WoW, good for you. 12 years? That is beautiful.

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 Yea, I was thinking that too. DEM's blue and REP's red. **shrug**

Anyway, I can't believe NORTH CAROLINA is on this list. I live in North Carolina, and we don't (or atleast I don't) see BW/WM/NON-BM relationships much. Every blue moon I'll see a WM/BW couple.  All I see MOSTLY are BM/WW relationships. 

The Working Home Keeper 6639 pts

 AminahMatthews I live in NC as well - most of the IRR I see are BW/WM.  Go figure!

AminahMatthews 545 pts

 The Working Home Keeper

 REALLY? What part because I sure don't see it here in this god forsaken town call winston=salem. Maybe I need to get out...way out more.