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Humor

Friday Funny: Dumb Sh%# Black People Say to Excuse Abysmal Behavior

These games are always so fun, aren’t they? This week’s Friday Funny will challenge your creativity, because you’re going to have to scrape your skull for all the dumb-assed, blame-the-victim bull crap black people use to justify the worst behaving people amongst us. Most of the behaviors that some of us excuse are beyond any legitimate defense, but hey! that doesn’t stop us from trying.

Granted, this is exactly funny, but the thinking behind the excuses is indeed laughable. Which is why I’m poking fun of it. Plus, sometimes you just have to laugh to keep from crying.

But if your eyes get all puffy and stuff, I have a prize for the best excuse you can come up with. Winner will be judged on whether I laugh so hard that even I cry. Here’s the prize. Apropos, don’t you think?

Okay; I’ll start:

On the rape of an 11-year-old child:

“That girl was fast! She dressed like a 20-year-old! So what if she didn’t have any pubic hair–she probably shaves it!!!”

“Why send these promising boys into the prison system. Don’t we have enough brothas in The Clink? You’re just providing new slave labor for The Man!!”

“Where was that child’s mother?? She’s really the one to blame! What kind of mother let’s their child run free all times-a-night? What’s that you say? My underage son was out too? Don’t you cloud the issue with your f%#$ing logic!!”

“I’m not saying those brothers are wrong, but I bet men of other races had a taste too! Why come they not being arrested and shite?”

On out-of-wedlock births:

“The pregnancy just happened. Haven’t you heard of Mary and Joseph?”

“Jesus was a product of an out-of-wedlock birth, you biiiiiiitttchh!

And that’s just off the top of my head. I KNOW there’s more, because we’ve had a good 40 years to come up with some really pathetic excuses that the world seems to swallow whole.

Ready, set, GO!

 

 

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