Halle Berry’s Ex Goes HAM on Turkey Day; Olivier Martinez Kicks His Ass, Makes Citizen’s Arrest

This whole thing would be hilarious if there wasn’t a helpless and innocent child involved. Apparently Gabriel Aubrey went Hot Ass Mess on Halle’s fiance, Olivier Martinez (aka The Squinter) when he dared mention that the three of them move on from the recent court acrimony, in which a Los Angeles court ruled that Halle and Olivier would not be allowed to uproot Nahla and move to France. Martinez (46), who’s got a decade on the handsome weenier, Aubrey (36), did enough damage to EACH OTHER to warrant both them needing to go to the hospital.

According to reports

Aubry was taken to a hospital for a broken rib, contusions to his face, and possibly a head injury. A short time later, Martinez was taken to the same hospital with a neck injury and possibly a broken hand.

As a result, a judge has issued an emergency protective order mandating that Aubry stay at least 100 yards away from Berry, Martinez, and Nahla, reports TMZ.

Looks like not all the French are scaredy-cats when it’s time to fight. Martinez can lay down the hamma!!

What a clusterphuck for Nahla, who I’m sure saw the whole thing and watched in horror. At four years old, children have memories. No way she’s forgetting two very important men in her life fighting like high school boys on Thanksgiving day. So…thanks a lot douches.

Personally, Gabriel Aubrey seems like a prick, which is par for the course in terms of Halle’s choice of beaus over the years. BUT! He sure was the bee knee’s when she deliberately, and WITH INTENT got pregnant by him. Halle is a woman of means. If she didn’t want a man involved with her daughter, she could have bought some sperm and never had to deal with the courts, and then she and her daughter could move to the farthest corners of the earth without the interference from anyone. (Think for a sec, if you will, the kind of sperm Halle can buy. I mean, 180+ IQ, great teeth, no pesky congenial diseases–basically a designer baby.) But she didn’t do that. As with most of us–we loved the guy at the time, and hoped, wished and prayed for the best. The best didn’t happen, and now you have to deal with the fallout. With every choice comes a consequence.

For the sake of all things Nahla, I hope these three work it out.

The Man Myth