People think I have it against Halle Berry because I say she’s CRAY CRAY (ooops, I wasn’t supposed to call her that anymore–sowwee!). But I don’t have anything against her personally–she’s a beautiful and accomplished woman. My beef with her is how she’s handling the custody issue with ex and baby-daddy, Gabriel Aubrey. And now that I find out that this woman is really getting married to The Frenchman and wants to move to France, I’m gonna use my platform to advocate for poor Nahla, who’s in the middle of this tug of war and Halle’s attempt to completely erase the fact that she picked Gabriel, dated him for five years, and PLANNED A PREGNANCY WITH HIM. I brought this issue to the BB&W fan page, and predictably, women raced to Halle’s side, saying that she had every right to move to France, and if Gabriel didn’t like it, he could just move there too. Here’s what I said:
A child is entitled to involvement by BOTH parents. You know how many times I’ve wanted to move out of the state I’m in? Guess why I don’t? Yep–because Maxi-Me’s dad lives here and regardless of how crappy he might have treated ME, he ADORES his daughter and has every right to see her. I don’t want my daughter hating me because I kept her away from her dad. That is my obligation to my daughter as her mother. Get it?
And of course folks replied with blah, blah, blah, “We don’t know that whole story; shame on you Christelyn for being so judgmental!”
Understand this people. Halle has a well-documented health condition–Type 1 diabetes. Combine that with being over 40, trust and believe she had some medical input BEFORE she conceived, so this wasn’t an “Oops! Surprise! We’re pregnant!”
Ask me if I care if Gabriel was arsehole-y to her. Ask me if I care if he cheated. What’s that got to do with the price of tea in China? He loves his daughter, wants to be involved in her life, and has EVERY LEGAL RIGHT TO BE. It kills me how some women think that they just have the right to take their kids away from their fathers because they get mad at them. Life don’t work like that, boo boo. People need to stop confusing what THEY WANT with what their children NEED.
My pal Elizabeth Henderson summed it up beautifully:
Reading these comments reinforces to me why marriage in the US is in the dismal state itâ€™s in and why divorce and child custody proceedings are so ugly. People want things to be their way or the highway when relationships are about compromise. â€œI have money/fame/fortune/ donâ€™t get along with the other parent so I should be able to do whatever I want! He has his own money and a passport so why canâ€™t he follow me and move wherever I go?â€ What about the child? Itâ€™s so selfish! If you didnâ€™t want to have to answer to another person and live your life however you want than you should’ve taken the sperm bank route or, not have had children.
I’m not good in math, but the common denominator in all Halle’s failed relationships is…well…HER!!
I wish folks would think more about how this affects kids. If I’m on anyone’s side, it’s Nahla’s.