Family

New Study Points to Parent’s “Over Praise” as Narcissism Trigger

Who could forget this scene from the Nutty Professor?

 

Turns out that sort of blind praise (telling your kids their better than everyone else and deserve superior treatment) is fostering narcism later in life, according to a new study by researchers at Ohio State University. As a child of the 70’s and the abysmal failure of the you’re-awesome-for-no-reason self esteem movement, I can’t say I’m surprised that there’s a marked rise of narcissism in the West. Too many people think they’re fabulous for absolutely no reason other than THEY ARE. That’s why I cringe a little when some of us in the black community call ourselves “queens and kings.” Not everybody is a queen, and not everyone is a king. Made up labels to inflate the ego of someone who lacks all semblance of any accomplishments other than a god-awful annoying adoration of self is damaging, and if you’re doing it with your kids, you should probably stop. When you tell your kids that they’re better than everyone else by birthright, just remember those little boogers grow up, and more often than not, they become depressed, disillusioned, and often destructive when the rest of the world doesn’t agree with you.

“Narcissistic children feel superior to others, believe they are entitled to privileges, and crave for constant admiration from others,” study author Eddie Brummelman tells Forbes.com. “When they fail to obtain the admiration they want, they may lash out aggressively. Narcissistic individuals are also at increased risk to develop addiction. Subgroups of narcissists, especially those with low self-esteem, are at increased risk to develop anxiety and depression.”

Surprisingly, the researchers remark that self-esteem doesn’t come from blind praise, but from love and affection. People with high self-esteem don’t think they’re better than other folks, while narcissists do.

Narcissistic individuals feel superior to others, fantasize about personal successes, and believe they deserve special treatment. When they feel humiliated, they often lash out aggressively or even violently. Unfortunately, little is known about the origins of narcissism. Such knowledge is important for designing interventions to curtail narcissistic development. We demonstrate that narcissism in children is cultivated by parental overvaluation: parents believing their child to be more special and more entitled than others. In contrast, high self-esteem in children is cultivated by parental warmth: parents expressing affection and appreciation toward their child. These findings show that narcissism is partly rooted in early socialization experiences, and suggest that parent-training interventions can help curtail narcissistic development and reduce its costs for society. [SOURCE]

Parents, do us all a favor and stop telling your kids they should be worshipped just because they breath. Eventually they make for horrible wives and husbands.

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