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Open Thread: Parenting the biracial child.

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I read this exchange on the
Recent Incident in Maine a Sober Reminder That Interracial Couples are Still a Target
article and thought it important enough for it to have it’s own thread. For those of you parenting biracial children please share your stories and questions.  For those of you who are old hands at it do offer any advice for new parents.
Ladies and Gentlemen the floor is yours.
ErinJBilliot

I have two biracial kids. They live everyday with the knowledge of how people feel about them. Just recently my son was told by this girl that she was not allowed to see him because he is mixed! Heartbroken and angry my heart hurt for him. The world is never going to change, unfortunately.Edit

Dan DickDan Dick

@ErinJBilliot That is indeed sad and shallow of the kid’s parents.  However, I believe I see every indication that things have already changed for the better tremendously–they’re just not perfect yet.  This world will always have a few screwballs here and there who will never learn to see or feel reasonably about things.

My daughter and son are mixed white and Chinese, and here in California, they are both loved dearly.  Mixed kids are often absolutely gorgeous, but so are non-mixed kids.  Sometimes rejection will send you to a better place with better people.  Or if your son and the girl decide to endure the storm, her parents may come around eventually.  I had a black friend who passed away a few months ago and he was married to a Chinese Indonesian.  Her mom never seemed to accept my friend fully, but she was OK with me being married to my wife who is Chinese, and she is sort of like a mom to me–scolds me when I’m late, etc.  Their daughters are beautiful young women in their 20s.  One is about as tall as me–6’1″.

I find it hard to believe there are still prejudiced people today.  A few years ago my wife, daughter and I were in Chattanooga and drove back down to Atlanta to catch a flight home to California, and when I went to the gas station, the people there looked at me with a look that almost seemed to say, “Oooo, what are you doing here???”  They were all black and I am white.  I almost joined a predominantly black church in Fresno and have attended Indonesian churches for much of my life so I tend to settle into any cultural environment and love it.

I don’t say that to glorify myself for being so non-prejudiced.  I feel luck people are not prejudiced against me, or at least i don’t feel it most of the time and I feel blessed to love and be loved by people and to see the beauty in people of different races.  I have believed for years that the difference in people’s appearances is an expression of God’s love and creativity and ability to create beauty in this world.  I don’t just avoid being prejudice–that’s not enough.  God did not call us to be tolerant.  He called us to love.

So if we want to love and obey God, we have to love and honor our brothers and sisters of every color.

ErinJBilliotErinJBilliot

Your words are very touching and thank you. Its hard as a parent to your child rejected like that, but I know there are people out there who don’t care. We are all gods children and in the end that’s what matters. God bless you and your family!Edit

DarqDivaDarqDiva

I just had to talk to my 3 year old about race. 3! A beautiful child. Another child told her she wasn’t pretty because she’s not brown. Can you believe it? 3! Yes, the child who told her that was black. But my bigger concern is who is teaching their baby this garbage?! 3 year olds don’t come up with this mess on their own. But it broke my heart to have my baby ask me if she has to be brown to be pretty.Edit

P BANKSP BANKS

Its so sad being African American my race is told that we are not good enough, pretty because we are not white or light. I pray that You told your precious child to love Color. I teach my kids to love their black. So whatever color You are know that You are so beautiful

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