Being Soft is Pretty Sweet :)

Being Soft is Pretty Sweet :)

WARNING!!! This post is not meant for happily masculine women, happily androgynous women, or feminists, so for all of our sake please skip this post. This post is ONLY meant for women who are interested in becoming more old fashioned/classically/traditionally feminine . Please focus your comments on the topics presented in this post and keep it [...]

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WARNING!!! This post is not meant for happily masculine women, happily androgynous women, or feminists, so for all of our sake please skip this post. This post is ONLY meant for women who are interested in becoming more old fashioned/classically/traditionally feminine :) . Please focus your comments on the topics presented in this post and keep it classy and respectable ladies.

 

Kerry Washington

Kerry Washington

I don’t mind being soft, I actually like it. You have to be gentle with something soft. If you are soft then you don’t have to put up with things other people have to. You can protect yourself and you don’t need anyone’s permission to do so. People don’t expect you to tolerate harshness, you are excused. Your comfort and protection is of the utmost importance.

What I don’t understand is how some women complain about being treated like unfeeling pack mules and yet continue to act like unfeeling pack mules. Why don’t you just stop it? If everyone thinks you are strong, you can take everything, and you actually like drama and arguing…why do you play into those assumptions? Why do you complain over and over about mammys and mules and then proudly conform to those very stereotypes? Putting up with disrespect doesn’t mean you are strong, it just means you have no problem with being treated badly and that’s sad. Get your mind out of Blackistan! Why don’t you tell people you need help, you can’t handle everything, and you don’t want to be on the defensive all the time? Why don’t you just start acting softer? If you want something to change then you have to change something!

Well some women will say that acting softer will make them weak and vulnerable and people will take advantage of them. Understand I Softnesssaid soft–not stupid. Being soft means you actually raise your standards and require better treatment from others. You don’t even give anyone the chance to harm you. You can be soft and pleasant and still say no, in fact, you don’t have to argue or fight at all because you don’t need to expose your precious mind to negativity. You do not have to tolerate being treated like a mule for one second because you are no mule! You are a lady and must always be treated as such.

Let others accept poor treatment because they somehow convinced themselves this proves they are “mature” and “real women”. If they feel proud about how much abuse they can take, let them. In the meantime, enjoy the freedom, peacefulness, joy, and serenity of being soft and cherished :)

esperanza

Esperanza Spalding

 

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DU2 2191 pts

I am so sorry for coming late to the "party". This is a great post  and I agree, the ones who want to stay "hard" let them. My only annoyance is that some of these "ride or die" disciples is that they try to spew their venom on those who find great joy in being soft and feminine with ridicule and mockery. Silk  is soft and it is one of the strongest natural fibers and one of the most beautiful natural fibers, silk, is  strong, resilient and unlike any other natural fiber, it is unique.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

For the movie enthusiasts here, if your interested in access to an actress (or actors) body of work check out IMDB.com If you type in a name it will bring up every movie or tv show that person was ever in! It's invaluable for any one who needs quick access to who played in what role!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

I've never been a big fan of redheads but Rita Hayworth just oozes sexiness!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

Okay ladies, I love all of you femininity embracing, sweet things! My question? Who is your feminine fashion Icon? Audrey Hepburn? Halle Berry? Marilyn Monroe? Lena Horne? Vanessa Williams? Grace Kelly? Beyonce' Knowles? Does anybody identify with June Cleaver?

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  my favorites- Doris Day, Ava Gardner, Jane Russell, Bette Davis, Scarlet O'Hara, Diahann Carroll, Julie Andrews.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 MissFLondon You picked some great ones! You have classy taste! I was particularly fond of Grace Kelly in my youth. Watch her in Rear Window, if you've never seen it! When she bent down to kiss Jimmy Stewart with those red lips, I think my breathing stopped! I didn't have that reaction in movies again untill I saw a close up of Catherine Zeta Jones in Zorro!

 
MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH I am going to have to be contrary, yet again! I like the idea of Grace Kelly, but something about her leaves me cold, rather like a latter day Gwyneth Paltrow.

 

Funnily enough, Rear Window is the only film where I think she really came out of herself. Her chemistry with Jimmy Stewart her wit and frankly her willingness to play his side kick really brought out something in her that is absent in her other films. I'm going to have to watch that again, and then google to see if these 2 worked together in any other films!! Ok and maybe to catch a thief - but it might just be Cary Grant!!

 

Zeta is a goddess, I thought that that kind of unashamed glamour was finished after Elizabeth Taylor, but she really radiates it. In this category, I also rate Dita Von Teese.

Karla 18238 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH I'm feeling you on Grace Kelly.  I loved her in "Rear Window" and "To Catch a Thief" but otherwise, I'm indifferent.  I'll tell you this much, though.  Both she and Eve Marie Saint ("North By Northwest", another Cary Grant pairing) had the best looking blonde hair I've ever seen.  What is up with women and dyed blond hair these days?  I saw Heidi Klum in a Pantene commercial and she had dark roots!  It was very tacky, IMO.  Grace Kelly and Eve Marie Saint were never seen with dark roots and their hair was silky smooth, shiny and sleek.  As far as I'm concerned, that is part of grooming.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 Karla  CAPT SMOOTH Karla, if only you knew how the topic of roots on platinum hair is one of irritation for me! I am a hairdresser, specialising in extensions for European women.

 

Hair can sometimes be subconscious statement (slightly unfair I know) -my slightly messy bedhead leaves no one guessing- I am disorganised and don't take things too seriously.

 

If you have made the decision to be a blonde you must commit, showing your roots always reminds me of that disappointing scene in the wizard of oz when we get to see past the veneer.

 

This is no judgement of the choice itself, simply puzzlement at the willingness to allow standards to slip. I have dyed brown hair and a weave so I too am working that make believe. Dyed hair means that you have become involved in a charade of your own choosing, kindly play the part until the bitter end!!

 

We are not just discussing roots here, it's also the 5 shades too dark eyebrows that leave me cold. This also goes for women who can't walk in their heels- Get low or more comfortable heels or simply practice.

Karla 18238 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH Exactly.  If one wants to dye their hair, commit to it.  Unfortunately, the dark root thing seems to be a hairdo in itself because I see it all the time.  Do these women just have no pride or are they lazy?  And, yes, the brows too.

 

I'm with you on the heels too.  I have seen so many young women wearing very thin, stilettos and tottering dangerously.  That is not a good look!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 Karla  CAPT SMOOTH I must admit that I appreciate slightly darker roots with long medium to dark blonde hair in a beach babe style.

But high polish is high polish, the roots fall flat. I adore Heidi Klum's persona and her sense of fun, though sometimes I am left questioning her taste. That's just me personally

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon  Catherine Zeta Jones is always on point style-wise.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  Karla  CAPT SMOOTH There was a time not too long ago when blonde weaves with dark roots were THE rage. Weird.

Karla 18238 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH I like Heidi too but for a shampoo commercial, I would have thought that Pantene would want the hair to look as amazing as possible.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 MissFLondon

 Another Grace Kelly movie you might want to check out? High Society.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon I've seen that one. I remember it being rather slow...

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH What about Catherine Deneuve? She just oozes old-time glamour and class.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 MissFLondon  Karla

 I have love everything feminine on a woman but I have two weaknesses when it comes to you ladies!

1.Stilletoe heels. Not only do they give a woman a sexier walk but they reapportion a womans legs and bottom from just "nice" to "alluring". Plus, in a guys mind there is the slightest chance you might fall...right into our open and loving arms! I read recently in an article where Salma Hayeck stated that a girl wasn't a woman untill she could walk confidently in high heels!

2.  Lipstick. There is something so inherently sexy about watching a woman do something as intimately feminine as applying lipstick!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH The reason I've always liked Deneuve is that with her, her essence just seeps out of her pores.

 

Women like that just bring themselves to the party as is, there is no careful studying of other people's manners or expectations, she is really just that elegant, femme and comfortable in her own skin, and has always been (I adore Monica Belluci for this same reason). 

 

With Bruni, we had a very different lady prior to her marrying the then president, the muted shades and and elegant complicity is a definite 180, I have to admit to being a bit less smitten. She is a bit more like Madonna, who goes though extreme fazes.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH I was going to mention Monica Belluci. And Marion Cotillard, I love style which is simple and non-fussy.

 

Yes, Carla Bruni had a crazy past... but she seemingly did an about turn.   imo Madonna's 180 was as insincere as they come. It was just too matronly- that governess thing round about the time she played Evita.

 

 

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 I think Monica Bellucci is the sexiest european ever! With the exception of Bridgitte Bardot! I still can't understand why she hasn't been picked as a Bond girl yet!

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon  Karla :)

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH Again, I'm just being difficult, but the music and stars of High Society make it a fun viewing.

 

But I prefer the zing and general actor chemistry of The Philedelphia Story (the film that High Society is the remake of). Cary Grant, Katherine Hepburn AND James Stewart!! Magic. The pace is that rapid All about Eve type of humour.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  Karla You are not alone in either of these preferences; most men share them. Less for the heels and colour themselves and more for the suggestions that tend to go hand in hand with them.

For a while, there was an urban legend that Marilyn Monroe shaved an inch off just one of her heels to get the famous wiggle; turns out that was 100% hers!

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH Nah you're not being difficult :) Things appeal to us differently. I've never seen Philadelphia Story but it must be super with a cast like that!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH Governess!!! Hah.

 

With Carla Bruni it's not so much the crazy past (even the sweetest girls have them) It's the lack of discretion and her reveling in her notoriety that leaves me unconvinced- that tendency never really goes away. It will be interesting to see if she can keep up the Jacqui O thing.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH   I do hope so but time will tell.  Quite a scandalous past, that lady.

 

...Btw on a totally different note her step sons via Sarkozy are gorgeous.. Just thought to slip that in.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  KingsDaughter Sadly Bardot has messed up her legacy with a decade of erratic behaviour and racist outbursts. To compound the issue is ageing dreadfully and favours gypsy costumes. She must have the same PR team as Chris Brown? I'm team Sophia Loren/ Raquel Welch. Those women need to start ageing some time soon or else there will be accusations of witchcraft.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH  Also it seems Bardot didn't take care of her looks (probably the smokes). I don't know but the bombshell types seem to lose their appeal very fast as they age.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH I don't know, Bacall is keeping her end up! I know she was never considered Marilyn league but I've always seen her as a bombshell.

 

Re bombshell longevity, If all you are selling is sex, you need to hold on to that. If there's some other magic, then fine. Marilyn had comic timing and though we will never know, but when the fanfare died down, she might have graduated to a sort of ditsy Mae West.

 

I never got the allure of Audrey Hepburn, but I recognise that her offerings are eternal- taste, elegance and charm don't seem to fade. 

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH  So true. You need talent to back up the hotness otherwise as you age theres the danger of becoming an elderly caricature of yourself. I like Audrey Hepburn, Roman Holiday is one of my favs but in terms of beauty she was fairly ordinary imo but she had a sweetness and frailty about her which is very appealing.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH I do like to see what nontraditional beauties can do with themselves. She scrubbed up well and managed, with restraint to play a call-girl without coming across as tacky. If Marilyn had played Holly Golightly (as Capote had wanted) the whole thing would have been bawdy.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 MissFLondon  KingsDaughter

 I sounds like your as big a movie buff as me! I like them both for different reasons, but If you love the snappy banter of the movies from that era did you ever see "His Girl Fiday"? Another Cary Grant movie but the dialogue just pops! 

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  KingsDaughter Nope, not seen that one but I have to now!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 As long as your okay with black and white movies!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  KingsDaughter I love them

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon I love black and whites.

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH I agree. It would have been over the top!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 I agree she hasn't aged well! If a woman whose been known for her beauty all of her life, starts looking really bad it's time to fade into th background!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 I love talking cinema! There are a lot of classy women here that know their stuff when it comes to old movies!

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon LOL what?! You didn't just say that! Well age happens, no need for them to hide in the attic Capt. Smooth.

 

...but it's good to age gracefully (and some manage very well) I think they start looking really bad when they attempt to hang onto fading youth.  Think Pam Anderson.

MissFLondon 655 pts

 KingsDaughter  CAPT SMOOTH For me, it is their refusal to learn new tricks i what makes them attic-worthy, not so much the aging itself.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 MissFLondon  KingsDaughter

 

"You know how to whistle don't you Steve? Just put your lips together and blow!" She was 19 when she uttered those words! Amazing! No wonder Bogey married her!

 

 I think you hit the nail on the head! Audrey was more of womans woman! Men thought she was cute but women appreciated (as you said) her eternal taste charm and elegance!

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 I think it's better to leave people with the impression that your beauty is eternal than to age badly! Personally, I don't think Marilyn would be the Icon she is today if she hadn't died at the peak of her attractiveness!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  KingsDaughter Which is why the Bacalls, Belluccis' fascinate me  -  though unapologetic in their sensuality, they seem to be able to appeal to both of the sexes; which is a rare ability.

 

I adore Bacall in everything. She always appears like a well mannered woman who will match you in everything, but only if you push her!

MissFLondon 655 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  KingsDaughter Sad but true

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 MissFLondon  CAPT SMOOTH Agreed.

CAPT SMOOTH 7386 pts

 KingsDaughter  MissFLondon

 You know that is the one dealbreaker for me! I can't stand smoking!  It ages a woman so badly!

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon Well yeah but see the sad thing is how the line between the on screen star and the real person is  so blurred that at times audiences can't imagine you any other way than what they see on screen. It's also kind of unfair that this is more often than not applied to women. Do you think some of the heart throbs like James Dean would have had the same problem?

KingsDaughter 4641 pts

 CAPT SMOOTH  MissFLondon It's a a terrible habit all round. I once dated a smoker, he was cute though but blech it's nasty.