I don’t know who this guy is, but he’s got my respect. This microscopic group of Ralph Richard Banks-esque men truly DO LOVE black women, so much so that they are willing to tell the truth, even though it betrays the fraternity.
I don’t know who this guy is, but he’s got my respect. This microscopic group of Ralph Richard Banks-esque men truly DO LOVE black women, so much so that they are willing to tell the truth, even though it betrays the fraternity.
Now of course the GAT-DL is out in full force, calling this man a gay-sellout-coon-race traitor. Who’s surprised?
And now for something completely different.
Not wanting to steal brother man's thunder but you have got to check this site out. Sit back with a coffee and be entertained.
http://blackdatingexperiment.blogspot.com/
Brenda55
Lmao!!!!!!!.....I took your advice, sat back with a cup of coffee and was very entertained:).....the thing that I find most bizarre about the whole thing is I don't know how many of my white friends have told me horror stories about how these kinds of guys have dogged them out.... all I can say is bm are most definitely about "self interest".....smdh
Brenda55 I'm glad I wasn't drinking coffee because I would have been in respiratory distress. OMG, I was laughing so hard, although it really isn't funny... I guess the humor was because the girl was tricking these men into letting it all hang out and her sidebar comments. I think my personal favorites were the guy who said, "They obviously don't appreciate you taking their finest men." and the other guy (Ghanian) who said (about Nigerian women), "They are loud and they stink and they have evil minds." Wow, stereotype much? The one light under the bushel was the guy who told her their views were diametrically opposed and he did it politely. Thanks for the laugh of the day. I'm so glad I learned early not to subject myself to this.
Brenda55
That was disgusting. Simply disgusting. And then with crap like that in full display for ANYONE to see, you still have people who will insist that I am "Wrong" when I say that Black men absolutely HATE Black women. As far as the one who "Defended" sistas, well I will acknowledge that he cut it short, but at the same time, I do not see saying that "Since my mum is Caribbean, she is no knatty head" "Defending". I am not sure I understand, because most Black women from the Caribbean look similar/the same to/as African-American women and African women, so did he mean his mum is Light-skinned, straight-haired (Which would be yet another example of how these Black men try to play Black women with different complexions/hair types against each other)? Or is "Knatty Head" a British slur aimed only at non-Caribbean Black women? The bottom line is that if that is the BEST that Black men can do, then I am even more scared for Black women & girls then I already was before.
Brenda55
(Part 2)
And as far as the fictional racist against Black women Blondie character that the
blog host was playing goes, let me tell you people that is how A LOT of White
women & girls feel about Black females. Having a non-Black appereance has taught me that.
The bottom line is that Black men and their White female sidekicks are simply dripping with hate and contempt for Black women. Sistas, please be careful out there.
That site is worth a whole post!Brenda55
nice clip!
It is a good thing to have a nice figure, a pretty face and all those qualities that men want in a woman. But none of this can help you land a good man unless you love yourself and actually believe that you are worthy of love.
I have friends who are much more beautiful than me yet some of them date men I would not touch with a ten foot pole!
One of them was involved with an emotionally abusive man and I kept asking her a hundred times 'why do you keep up with that nonesense?'
He messed up with her self esteem and I just can't understand it because she has a face I would kill for! She is way more beautiful than me but she does not see it at all. I thank God that I have learned to love myself.
Ladies if you want to get a husband, step one is to convince yourself that you are a good catch!
"If you're in your 30's and still looking for swag?" This is it for me. I have never been able to figure out why this would come between some women and their common sense. Kudos to this man for speaking the truth.
I finally saw the video. (Thanks for sending me the link you guys!...NOT!! I had to watch it on my cell phone, but it's cool, I'm not mad...)
Anyway, the guy was on point. I especially liked the part where he talked about women in their 30's talking about they want a man who has swag. I've heard that too, and I like for a man to have a certain masculine energy, a certain je ne sais quo, but I'd prefer a good credit rating, lack of debt, and a bank account with a bit of money stashed away for a rainy day (not to mention good character and a full set of pearly white teeth).
I was reading a book some time ago where black women in the 60's and 70's were saying that they chose men based on which men had the most flavor. I'm guessing 'flavor and sense of smoothness and style' is the modern day equivalent of 'swag'.
But what does it say about how low the standards of many black women are for black men that their first priority is to look for some intangible sense of style rather than tangible qualities that indicate that mans ability to be a protector and provider? What does this say about how little black men have had to offer black women for so long that many black women have long failed to develop any real standards for black men? I guess some black women figured that if they asked for more than the bare minimum they wouldn't meet any viable black men for relationships at all.
Jamila
"I guess some Black women figured that if they asked for more than the bare minimum they wouldn't meet any Black men for relationships at all".
THIS, and to add to it let me say that since Black women cannot ask for financial stability, emotional support, etc from Black men lest they be called "Bougie, too demanding gold-diggers" they probably figure they might as well focus on swag. They need to get SOMETHING out of these relationships.
JamilaI guess some black women figured that if they asked for more than the bare minimum they wouldn't meet any viable black men for relationships at all.
^^^This is a self esteem issue. When it comes to our bodies, our esteem is high; when it comes to our souls, not so much. Some believe they don't have the right to ask, nor deserve the best. Some figure, this is the best it's going to get,; so be grateful for it.
Now THIS is a Black man who I would PROUDLY call "Brother". I do not understand why it is seen as shameful/weak to be down for the women of your race the way it is in the Black community, no, scratch that, I DO know why. It is simply because too many Black men hate Black women and girls. Well I want nothing to do with that scum. You hate my mother, sisters, aunts, nieces, female cousins, etc then I hate you, and I have NO shame in saying so, period, end of story. I love Black women & girls with all my heart, they come first with me, always have and always will, and I do not care who is bothered upset with this fact.
Thanks brother for making this great video. It will warm the hearts of many of our sisters, make them feel good & happy, and they DESERVE to feel that way.
Not trying to be sarcastic, but sensible BW shouldn't need anyone to tell them that they should consider dating/marrying quality men who are not Black. That should be a no brainer.
But just like common sense isn't really common, some women will need a little nudge towards looking out for their own best interests, particularly if they have been raised in a culture that discourages them from 'looking out for #1'. Patricia Kayden
Jamila Patricia Kayden
Right!
JamilaPatricia Kayden Exactly. Very well said.
I love nice, reasonable, black people. He acknowledged that some black men arent committing, and was candid about black women not waiting for black men. He made a good point, sisters do need to grow out of the "swag" thing. At a certain point its just not important (like after high school).
NoDramaCiCi
Well please see above our discussion about why sistas focus on swag. We have to understand that a lot of the disfunction we are seeing when it comes to relationships in the Black community on Black women's part are the results of their not being treated as women worthy of love, protection, being cherished, etc. from their male counterparts. You cannot tell a whole race of women for decades that you think they are ugly, disposable, mule workhorses to be used only for heavy lifting, dirty work, and the basest of certain desires while lusting after Becky, Maria, & Mei Ling for serious courtship/marriage without it having an adverse effect.
NoDramaCiCi Like not ever lol
its a positive video, but holy crap how long do we have to talk about the same thing for? Lets leave it alone for at least a week!!! Why are we always top news!?!? SMH
Choco, we have to keep talking about it because there is ALWAYS some new attack on Black women who have the nerve to actually think they deserve to be with good men who will love and cherish them, and that they deserve the same common courtesy and respect as other groups recieve. The haters of Black women & girls are loud and always flapping their gums. As long as that bunch keeps up their mess, we will have to keep talking about it.
Let me correct myself: There is ALWAYS some new attack on Black women, PERIOD. Even the ones who bend over backward to show loyalty to Black men and who are trying to hold the Black community together.
AIO Agreed! Its like marketing...no one has a few commercials put out to sale a product. Especially when propaganda and the snake oil and smoky mirror GAT-DL crew are putting out productions at the pace of Bollywood film producers...every second!
Speaking of which:
VibeMagazine:
Professor Michael Eric Dyson Calls Jay-Z 'An Icon Of American Excellence' bit.ly/tmjSw3
Mocha ZAIO
AabaakawadMocha ZAIO
I just heard a guest on Charlie Rose compare him to Shakespeare. I suppose it's ok because his misogyny is directed at mainly black women.
StellaTrishaScottAabaakawadMocha ZAIO Wait a minute, hold the phone...Shakespeare...REALLY??? How can anyone compare iambic pentameter and rhyme to whatever Jay-Z does? They both contain no subtext, so that is one thing they have in common
AabaakawadMocha ZAIO "...Jay-Z 'An Icon Of American Excellence' "
O.- say what? lolz
AabaakawadMocha ZAIO I always feel like the Will Ferrell character from Zoolander whenever I hear praise for Jay-Z....like "really? him?". I think it's because I focus a lot on melody and quality/timbre of voice when listening to music and his unmelodic voice plus his style of music doesn't really mesh with my preferences.
ChristieRJohnsonStellaTrishaScottAabaakawadMocha ZAIO It's a lot of bloody s*** Excuse me language
Chocomusings Ummm. Not to worry. Hopefully we won't be talking about this 10 years from now...hopefully. BWE bloggers and commenters do such an excellent job, perhaps less than that if people take heed. lol. Meanwhile, I stand in agreement with educating other BW so they can start living well too.
I don't know what's wrong with my computer but I cant play any of the videos that are embedded on blogs as of late, can you provide a link to this on youtube?
Jamila click on the title across the screen shot of the vid and it will take u to the actual youtube page the vid is on and u can play it there ( i always have that problem too).
Thanks for replying to me Jess. I tried to do that but for some reason it's like that whole screen has frozen up for me. *sigh* I wish I knew more about computers than just how to type on them. I've been having all sorts of problems with my laptop and my wordpress account the last few weeks. jess1
I agree with Chris. This man has told the truth about this subject in less than three minutes. He has both my respect and appreciation. There are good men out there, ladies----------of all colors.
Refreshing.. Finally a BM who is bold enough to tell the truth. I say Amen!
Now that is a stand-up guy. I appreciate his clear-eyed assessment, his honesty and his bravery.
Love it! And, for the record, the belief that some women have regarding the "meat" of Asian men? Wrong! Don't ask me how I know. Please, just take my word for it.
Karla Will do babe. They used to say the same stuff about white men and I KNOW that is not true. Lordy.
Brenda55 Truer words were never spoken...
***Smiling****.....So refreshing to hear a bm encouraging bw to focus on self interest. I love it when he said "basically it's all true" b/c I know too many bm who've tried to convince me that I don't see what I see and don't hear what I hear when I talk about the plight of bw and the ignorance of the "soul patrol" in the bc. It was nice to listen to a bm that wasn't cussing and shouting about how wrong ir dating/mating is and how we are going to be punished for leaving our "mule" post in the bc by going off to find peace and love with any man we choose.
glamdoll I don't know what it is about bw and self-interest. My thought is if I have no self-interest then I have no self-love. And lord knows I truly love myself.
eugeniamitchellglamdoll
I think bw have been conditioned to carry the bc for so many generations that the bw has been weighed down like a damn "mule"...smh. I left a comment on your blog talking about the joy of being free from this madness.
glamdoll I saw it, isn't it great to live life on your own terms. I know ppl hate ppl that are too free, though.
Yup...I could call him brother. This is the brother who would want the best for his sis. I have blood brothers like him and this guy is truly down for the sisters like my brothers are. Find someone that you relate to because sharing the same color is not enough.
I think his message about the swag being silly was on point too. I just wonder why BM are supposed to have cornered the market on swag?. Not to mention, swag may turn us off. Swag is sometimes too close to saying "player" for my liking. Matthew McConacute has swag and me thinks he is a ladies man....not sexy to me but maybe to those who like
swag. I love the southern drawl though...is it his natural speak?
Mocha Z Matthew McConacute lol is sooooooooo handsome. Did you see him in Lincoln Lawyer? Just fione.
mahogany Yup....he.got me in that movie. I like the mature roles for him. whew...need to dig out my Aunt O's funeral home church fans to cool down!
Mocha Z Yes, he's Texan.
I'm a fan!! I will share and link his video he is truly down for the sisters. He makes no excuses he pulls no punches the tells us to mix mingle and move ON...
He seemed very sincere, nice.
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