black women, fetish, skin, lupita nyong'o, racism, culture, society, stereotypes, Twitter, Dr. Lamont Hill, Melissa Hines Perry, dencia, whitenitious, skin cream, complexion, beauty standards, black skin, industry, shame, African, conversation about black women, value of dark skin, intellectuals, false concern, concern trolling, Black Woman Fetish Hysteria, BWFH, mujeres negras, fetiche, la piel, Nyong'o lupita, el racismo, la cultura, la sociedad, los estereotipos, Twitter, Dr. Lamont Hill, Melissa Hines Perry, dencia, whitenitious, crema para la piel, cutis, los estándares de belleza, piel negro, la industria, la vergüenza, Africana, conversación sobre las mujeres negras, valor de la piel oscura, intelectuales, falsa preocupación, preocupación curricán, negro Mujer Fetish Histeria, BWFH,

Can We Please Stop with the Black Woman Fetish Hysteria?…

I’ve watched with delight over the passed week since covering the Oscars and relishing in Lupita’s victory and observed all the speculation about what the actress’ next move will be. Not to go on a tangent, but what’s up with all this faux concern from black folks wringing their hands that Lupita is being fetishized? Don’t […]

Swirlr, dating, reality show, CNN, Youtube, interview, mixed dating, interracial relationships, blended families, advice,

Check Out My “Swirlr” Interview on CNN/HLN…Now the…

I was sick as a dog doing this show, but I managed to keep it together long enough to not look like I was ready to throw up on my shoes. I love the folks over at CNN…they are the only network that’s been so supportive of the notion of our changing demographic, and acknowledging […]

inspiration, stories, motivation, life, success, determination, quality of life, Barbara Hillary

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough – The Barbara Hillary Story…

  I stumbled across this video of the fabulous Barbara Hillary a couple years back and revisited it today.  As a relationship coach, I meet many women who don’t think they could go across town alone.  Some will call their mothers for something as simple as breaking a necklace, or have a fit if they can’t […]

movie, trailer, Quvenzhané Wallis, Jamie Fox, remack, adoption, orphan, Broadway, musical, white girls, black girls, Hollywood, actress, Annie,

Have You Seen the Adorable “Annie” Trailer Starring the…

“Annie” was one of my most-loved movies of all time. I introduced my children to it and it’s a pleasure we share together. I must admit I wasn’t sure what to expect from Quvenzhané Wallis taking over the role as Annie, but from the looks of it, she’s fit in just fine. There’s a few […]

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Time to Reactivate the Friday Funny: “Who Would You Boink,…

It’s been a loooong time since we’ve done, “Who Would You Boink,” and we haven’t done it since Livefyre allowed for commenters to post pictures and videos. Now BOINK 2.0 will be even more delicious. Okay here’s mine… Henry Cavill…Lawd…LAWD!! His lips are looking a little dry in this photo, though. Somebody pass him Lupita’s […]

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Really, Nicki Minaj? What Are You Trying to Prove?…

I was over at one of my favorite guilty-pleasure gossip sites and saw these photos of Nicki Minaj all-the-way-nekkid self posing dripping wet so all her fans can see she has hair down to the middle of her back. But why? What is she trying to prove…that she had hair under all that weave? Well […]

privilegios de los blancos, la expectativa, la enfermedad mental, los adolescentes, los padres, los niños, los medios de comunicación, white privilege, expectation, mental illness, teenagers, parents, Rachel Canning, children, media,

Rachel Canning, Girl Suing Her Parents for College Tuition Just Might…

Have you been following the story of 18-year-old college student, Rachel Canning, who is suing her parents, demanding that they pay for her high school and college tuition despite her absolute refusal to follow their rules? Honey-chile left when her parents had the NERVE to demand that she stop seeing a boy who they thought […]

Kurt, Quintana, dating, Youtube, romance, series, Swirlr, Jordan, mixed marriage, black women, date non black men, interracial, advice, experts,

It’s Here! The First Episode of “Swirlr”…

Sorry for the delay, but worry not, lovelies…here’s the first episode. I had a lot of fun with Kurt and Quintana. Both are young, and both have a lot to learn. You’ll learn more about each of them in future episodes, which will be released biweekly. Next episode, Kurt and Quintana will meet the candidates […]

dating, relationships, mating, swirling, For Hariet, black women dating outside their race, bi racial, mixed relationships, black women white men, asian men, jealous, BWE, blogs, hatred, shade, gossip, lies, defense, choices, options, lifestyle, parenting, families, community, black love, marriage prospects,

Confessions From a Woman Struggling with Her Sanity…Can You…

Writing has always been my escape from life. I understood, at a very early age, that no one really gave a fuck about what happened to me. My job as a child, and especially as a foster child, was to shut the fuck up, don’t create trouble, obey and create as many opportunities for my […]

citrus, humor, comedy, funny, California, tree, lime tree, health, fruit, lemons, limes, garden, water, drinks, benefits,

Strange Fruit…But It’s Still Good For You…

So I went out to my lime tree this morning and found this… And somebody had a dirty mind and did this… And then The Hubster did this… In any case, no matter what they look like on the outside, the same skin-loving goodness is the same on the inside. I start my morning with […]

hate,politics, Sterling, NAACP, NBA, sports, plantation, money, donations, sell out, black organizations sell out, money trail, racist rant, forgiveness, abuse, pop culture, racism, industry, news, media, organization, boycott, social media, racism, black men, stupidity, bed wench, white men, mixed marriage, shit haters say, black men hate black women dating out, black men hate black women, talking shit, stupid black guys, black women haters, youtube, video, powerless, resentful, bullying, comments,

Sh!t Haters Say to Discourage Black Women From Dating Out…

Attention haters, I have a confession. I only engage you in conversation in order to do the following: To demonstrate how much of an idiot you are, to show the world you’re an idiot, and to give real examples of your idiocy. Got this note on our Facebook fan page minutes ago. I was like […]

wedding, inspiration, mixed marriage, couples, interracial, swirling, fashion, style, wedding dress, lavender,

Lovely in Lavender: Claire and Phil…

Look at Phil and Claire’s beautiful wedding photographs.  It seemed very well planned, simple and elegant.  I found these on Hitched.  Enjoy these fabulous photographs.  They look so happy.   Photo credits:  A Little Box of Memories.   Claire and Phil met at a salsa club in Norwich and after a couple of dance related conversations […]

culture, music, art, oscars, black man, entertainment, Oscars, Pharrell, Happy, positivity, people, Billboard, hit music, producer, black women, urban music, inspiration,

Dear Black People, Can We Support More Songs Like This?!…

Okay I’m loving Pharrel right now. He killed it at the Oscars last night, and I loved how Lupita jumped in to get her grove on! Yes; Pharrel looks like the love child of Smokey the Bear and the Lucky Charms leprechaun, but even with that he’s still cute. He also seems to be a […]

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Monday Punday # 26…

Monday-Punday #26   Ah, the limerick – 5 lines of delightful nonsense (often ‘unclean’) – thus:   And now for the ‘juicy’ stuff … ———— Bill & Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season…opening day!!! Suddenly and very unexpectedly, before the game got started, Bill grabs Hillary by the collar and throws […]

Lupita Nyong'o, best dress, Oscar's, Prada, gown, Hollywood, award, television, 12 Years a Slave, best dressed, fashion, style, icon, black woman, beautiful, inspiration, red carpet look,

Oscars Best Dressed List: Spring 2014 Preview…

Your dreams are definitely valid, and everyone dreams of the Oscars. As America and the rest of the world gather around their TV sets to see what beautiful frocks the ladies and gents on the red carpet will wear, amazingly talented people prepare to be rewarded for their honest work. In which case, the Oscars […]

The Root, British born, Lupita Nyong'o, Steve McQueen , black women, allies, culture, politics, power, networks, support networks,

Judge Not An Ally By Their Skin Color or Whom They Marry…Support…

OMG…wow…super-duper congratulations to Lupita!! As Lupita Nyong’o tearfully accepts the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress and thanks Steve McQueen for giving her the chance to shine. In an article written recently by The Root, one writer admits that an American-born black person would not have given Lupita a chance because she doesn’t fit the […]

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The “Brown Girl” Academy Awards…Who Took the Show?…

About the most interesting part of the Oscars is the fashion. That’s why I watch…otherwise I’d be watching last week’s Young and the Restless. Well…I can tell you who I’m picking…     I love everything about this dress except one thing. It calls too much attention to her (lack of) chest. Lupita has a […]

QOTW, dating, video, advice, black women, curious, flirting, workplace dating, does she like me?, youtube, white men, swirlr, swirling, interracial, mixed dating,

QOTW: White Guys Asks, “Does My Gorgeous, Black Co-Worker Like…

The question: On the 3rd day of my new job I met the most beautiful and sexy woman I have ever met. She is black. It was very brief and before I jetted out of the break room (where we exchanged around 10 words) she asked me my name. I responded and asked for hers. […]

SMASHBOX, Gorgeous Spill, Lori Taylor , Cory Bishop, makeup, beauty, trends, style, black women, inspiration,

You Saw it Here First! Make Up Trends for the Oscars…Lori Taylor…

I don’t know about you, but I’m totally disinterested in who gets what award for the Oscars tonight. I’m more into what everyone will be wearing. “Each year I’m asked what the Red Carpet trends will be. I’ve definitely seen three distinct looks this season. A classic Hollywood glamour look with a defined cat eye […]

culture, race, ethnic, names, children, blended families, racism, discrimination, privilege, society, employment, stigma, dating, relationships, insight, black men, options,white men, black women, dating, interracial marriage, blended families, relationships, romance, flirting, advice, reader question, looking for love,

What’s In A Name?…

From time to time we discuss names black Americans give their children.  I have seen some pretty outlandish names encroached upon innocent children black and white alike who have to grow up and live in this society.  Some names subject children to endless bullying.  Having survived childhood teasing and possible bullying there is employment to consider.  It is […]