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Coaching: Help a Sister Be Catch the Menz With Feminine Wiles……

Got this letter from a young girl recently… Dear Christelyn, I love your posts, have read your book and been keeping up with Beyond Black and White’s social media for a while now. I am a black girl in my mid-20s, have never had a boyfriend, never been out on a date or been kissed. I’m currently finishing up my undergrad […]

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When It’s In Your Face, Will You Heed the Wakeup Call?!…

Let me first start by saying that this post is not about black men. This is about black women, and how some of them cling to the need to have a black man, no matter what the cost to their physical, spiritual and financial well being. This s about black women who see what is […]

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Open Thread: Wadda You Want? Suggest Subjects We Have Not Done…

Our motto: To select and serve.

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QOTW: White Guy Contemplating Leaving Marriage for Black Woman……

I got this note earlier today… Hi Cristylen, I’m in a predicament and could use your advice. Im a 34 year old white male fairly fit. Im a special education teacher and I’m married with a white woman with a one-year-old son. I love my son and my wife but we shouldn’t have married. I […]

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IRR Romance: Unbreakable Bonds…

Unbreakable Bonds by Aliyah Burke and Taige Crenshaw Aliyah’s thoughts: Unbreakable Bonds is a story about a woman who works in a bookstore, Ta-Mara LeBreaux. Her favorite book is one that has no author listed, nor an ending. It’s about a man who’s willing to go against the expectations of his place and time and […]

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Artichokes, Herb Mix, Peaches…Oh My! Early Summer in the Garden…

Kale is such an elegant plant… I’m especially excited with my garden this year. My first experimental growing season really allowed me to know how things grow, how much space, and how many of one species of plant I need. Six months of composting and diligent organic fertilizer has reaped me a ton of produce […]

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QOTW: Asian Man Asks, “Why Wouldn’t a Black Woman Not Want…

I wonder if the organizers of those studies that put Asian men and black women as the most unattractive and undateable knew of the psychological damage they have done. This is so awful and sad…

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Purple Reign…Three Product Favs to Get This Look…

I love purple…it’s my favorite color. Unfortunately, certain undertones in purple cosmetics don’t work for me. Sometimes they’re too blue or too red, which doesn’t work well for my yellow undertones. However, I’ve found that pigments with yellow or gold undertones work well…and that goes for virtually any color. Know your undertones, know which colors […]

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Letter Writer: “I didn’t even realize dating a non-black man was…

I love getting letters like this…makes it all worth it!   Good evening, Christelyn. My name is Dee and I found out about you from previously dating on afroromance.com.  I was moved to write to you when I read one of your articles on BBW dealing with Willie Pete and his misogynistic hate speech against […]

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How’s Swirling in the South? BB&W Goes to Charleston, SC!…

We’ve discussed how interracial relationships, and peoples’ openness (or not) to it often depends on the region in which you live. So I figured I need to get out there and find out for myself! First, Charleston is a beautiful city, full of history, and not all of it good. Originally called “Charles Town,” in […]

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Carrie: Making Love to ‘The Golfer’…

  As I lie in a hospice bed awaiting the answer to the extant question, ‘What’s wrong with me?’ I wondered… What really is wrong with me?  The halls of the Downtown Los Angeles Hospital echoed with cries of a madman refusing treatment, howls of terror crept up in my mind. Although I was alone, I […]

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Open Thread: Mother’s Day Wishes…

Well, we could not let this special day pass and not offer an opportunity to pay tribute to our MOMs. Wishing a very Happy Mothers Day to the ladies who helped to make us who we are.

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Toni: Black Women Losing in the ‘Fairness Game’…

Yep, it’s Toni! You know something is important when I decide to break my “I’m too busy to write or BBW” to write something for BBW. I have seen this behavior too many times not to speak on it, and I hope it helps to black women who are the topic of this discussion. Some […]

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Video: How to Get Along with the White Women in Your Rainbeau’s…

Now before you rev up your fingers for a rebuttal, understand that this video is based on my own individual experiences, but as the saying goes, yours may vary. I also need to put a disclaimer here for my friends who might be reading this–the majority of my friends offline are white women, and they […]

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Always Alluring: The Hidden Sexual History of Black Women and White…

Along the line of qui bono?, one might want to ask the question, who benefits from calling black women who date interracially “bed wenches?” Seriously. Ask it. Answer it. We’re told that white men men of centuries gone by collectively held disgust and contempt of black women, but is that totally true? I’ll have to admit, some […]

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BB&W Travel Adventure: Journey of My Life…

I apologize in advance for the low audio (s/n: headphones help!) But for those of you for whom this video is too low, basically this small town girl is going to the big city and beyond! ^_^ this past fall, I applied for an internship as a faculty advisor, and after three interviews I got […]

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Paleo-Friendly Rich, Thick Vegetable Soups to LOVE and Keep You FULL!…

Right now in the garden I’m harvesting the celery and broccoli that has been growing so well through the fall, but is getting close to the end of the lifespan and readying for the compost bin. I’ve been trying to find out a way to stay full longer on a mostly vegetarian diet until the […]

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Who Benefits From Black Women Not Feeling Feminine?…

I’m really glad more and more critically thinking black women are beginning to ask the right kind of questions.

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Jane Iredale Does Emollient Matte Red, NYX Does Great Foundation…

Right about now I have a good collection of red lipsticks, and I love them all I can’t decide which one is the best. However, the folks at Jane Iredale sent me a gorgeous red lippie that goes on so smooth with a semi-matte finish without drying out my lips, so I had to share. […]

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I came, I saw, I grilled.…

OK grill masters…..and mistresses. Good weather is here and its time to post your best grill recipes.  Tell us about your favourite dry rubs, wet mop, equipment, techniques and grilling sites. You name it. Don’t grill?  No problem. Give us the name and location of the best bar-b-que restaurant you’ve dined in. No reason why […]