Author Archive

A Response to “Do You Want to Date a White Guy…?” Article

Jun 25, in Editorial Staff, Hair, Living, Relationships, Swirling Singles, Swirling, the Book, Thriving, What the Cuss?, by Toni

What is it with this hair stuff?!

The “Black” box or the “Woman” Box: Where to jump?

Jun 21, in Editorial Staff, Gender Conflict, Living, Thriving, by Toni

You see, there are persons who consciously or unconsciously look at me and decide I have to choose a box to jump into: BLACK or WOMAN. Surprisingly, it is too much for some people to comprehend that I can be both at the same time.

Swirling in…Comics: Zephyr

Jun 15, in *Special*, Editorial Staff, by Toni

Have you heard of this gorgeous cartoon character?

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The Invisible Black Man: Hypnotism, indoctrination, or something else?

Jun 12, in Editorial Staff, Relationships, Thriving, by Toni

Thanks very much to Blackberry, who made a comment that reminded me of something I’ve seen FAR too often in controversial situations where black men are involved: “Fighting, tweeting, revenge sex, imm take your man! ….speaking of man…how is possible that public discourse places no blame on him! Kimmoira didn’t leave Kola while she had [...]

Eyes Wide Shut: Ignoring Reality In The Name of “Faith”…

Jun 11, in Editorial Staff, Living, Religion & Spirituality, Thriving, What the Cuss?, by Toni

Question: Have you observed persons encouraging a sense of spiritual naivety in black girls rather than preparing them for real issues? How do you feel “faith” is used to disarm black women and girls?

Um….Who are you?: Why that grudge you’re holding might be one-sided

Jun 9, in *uncategorized*, Editorial Staff, Living, Thriving, by Toni

Do you hold grudges? If not, what is your secret to letting things go?

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I might be crazy: Long hair on a guy as a turn on?

Jun 8, in Editorial Staff, Gender Conflict, Relationships, by Toni

Why I love guys with long hair?

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Claiming vs. Exclusion Part 2: Discrimination in IRR/BW-centric circles?

Jun 4, in Black Women's Empowerment, Editorial Staff, Gems from the Comments, Relationships, by Toni

Are we all on the same team?

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Recognizing the Necessity and Importance of Dark-Skinned Feminine Beauty

Jun 2, in Black Women's Empowerment, Editorial Staff, Living, Thriving, by Toni

I don’t know when it happened exactly, but one day, I was looking at television and it hit me: “Where are all the dark-skinned women?”

121

I might be crazy: Being a fan of Kpop, Jpop and Asian pop culture

May 28, in *Special*, Editorial Staff, Humor, Living, by Toni

So…..Any other black of Asian music, dramas, and pop culture? What are your experiences? Got a favorite artist?

114

Mean Mug: Do Black Women NEED to Smile more?

May 23, in Editorial Staff, Gender Conflict, Living, Politics, Relationships, Thriving, by Toni

Say, “CHEESE!!”

BEWARE of the “Polite” Poisoner

May 23, in *uncategorized*, Black Women's Empowerment, Black Women's Improvement Project (BWIP), Editorial Staff, Living, Thriving, by Toni

“The polite poisoner comes in the form of “the voice of reason” with a civil manner, a person that offers an “alternate point of view” or in the role of “devil’s advocate”. They do not call you a b*tch or a wh*re or threaten you outright. But if you read between the lines, not only are they insulting your intelligence, it’s very clear that their goal is to use, manipulate, and undermine you.”

The Gift of Shame (Part 1): Is a Little Shame <em>Always</em> Bad?

The Gift of Shame (Part 1): Is a Little Shame Always Bad?

May 21, in Black Women's Empowerment, Black Women's Improvement Project (BWIP), Editorial Staff, Gender Conflict, Living, No Wedding, No Womb!, Relationships, Thriving, by Toni

Toni argues that a little shame can be a good thing.

I Might Be Crazy: Life As An African American Female Football Fan

May 19, in *Special*, BB&W Exclusive, Humor, Living, Sports, by Toni

Soccer players are so dang HAWT!

Move away from the bull’s-eye part 3: Taking a bullet for indoctrination’s sake

May 17, in Black Women's Empowerment, Editorial Staff, Living, Thriving, by Toni

Picking up where I left off in part 2, I want to speak to why so many black women, no matter how intelligent, successful and yes, interracial relationship-minded, will take some unnecessary bullets and jump head-first into crosshairs. Fear is a major motivating factor, but inorder to understand the reason, you have to get at the root. That root is indoctrination.

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Keeping the Race Together or Keeping You Under Control?

May 14, in Black Women's Empowerment, Dating & Marrying Ethnic Men, Editorial Staff, Living, Relationships, Swirling, the Book, Thriving, by Toni

Christelyn’s new book is on the threshold of release as I’m typing this. And with that news comes the necessary promotion and word spreading you expect while trying to get a product out there to consumers. There was a link to one such feature that had the predictable bit of grumbling and talking points. You know, the lie-filled scare tactics that never fail to come up when black women even think about expanding their dating options.

In any case, one particular sentiment stood out to me…

Move away from the Bull’s-eye Part 2.5: Realizing you are NOT the target

May 11, in Editorial Staff, Living, Thriving, by Toni

(First and second parts are here) Before I move on to part three (indoctrination), I wanted to mention that sometimes I observe behaviors from people who don’t seem to realize that they aren’t being addressed in a certain situation: They seem to think they are being targeted when they are not. They participate in [...]