I just met the cute and boyishly charming Brian Landau, a performing artist on YouTube. I was interviewing a couple of cute Asian men about interracial dating, and upon discovering the conversation, he was instantly interested. He told me he sees tons of beautiful black women in the beach city of Southern California he lives, but he’s one of those guys that never approaches.
Brian is obviously not shy about some things, but I wonder if today’s reserve from men in general is coming more from a sense that it is somehow potentially offensive or considered harassment. It seems like the younger generation believes it’s safer to fall back in this regard and let the women show their interest first.
There’s a few challenges with this, because women aren’t really socialized to be “the hunters,” and there’s always that uncertainty about whether or not the guy is really interested or just going along for the ride. This usually isn’t the case the other way around because women tend not to think in terms of whether or not a guy is going to be an easy lay or a challenge. Men think in those terms.
In Brian’s case, he seems a bit of a mix. Show a little interest and he’ll meet you halfway. I personally thought he was adorable, and a really nice guy.
What do you think? Are women being too rigid about guys who don’t make the first move? On one hand we protest about street harassment and men pull all the way back for fear of being offensive, but then simultaneously challenge their manhood when they don’t make the first move. Of course there is a spectrum between harassment and simply asking for your name and a chance to talk to you, but…
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