The Question:

Dear Christelyn:

I am a 26 year old graduate student from Chicago whom is stuck in a pickle. Apparently. I have been having a strong interest in partaking in interracial dating but I am currently talking to a white guy around the same age as me but this is not the problem at heart. I have spoken about interracial dating with a lot of black people and they judge me for having an attraction for non-black men instead of black men saying that I have self-hatred but I do not at all. Right now, I am so worried about getting in a relationship with a non-black man since I do not want others to judge me anymore. But, the guy that I am talking too (his name is Patrick) has a strong attraction to me and I do as well and we have discussed about going into a relationship which he has no problem at all since he has dated other black women but I have never dated a white guy before. This is my 2nd time trying to date outside of my race since the first time didn’t work out since I was out of state and the white guy that I was talking to ended up getting married since I took too long for him. I was so sad but now since I am talking to a new guy, I feel like it may happen. But I just am concerned about judgement. Can you tell me how to change the way I feel? Make it better?

Sincerely,

“C”