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What the Cuss?

GRRR @ Interracial-Dating Apologists!

So I come back to the laptop after 12 hours of driving from San Francisco to Lancaster and I see that the Beyond Black & White Facebook page is lit up to the hilt, I’ve got personal messages from my girls alerting me that the page has been taken over by Trollpanians, so I have a look. One thing about the women who are throwing stones in my direction intrigues me. They all come at me with some variation of the same dog-dung:

“I’m dating [insert type of rainbeau here], but I don’t feel the need to bash black men and shame black women! I’m sensing through my special-spidey senses that you’re thinking that black people are bad and rotten, and even though you didn’t actually SAY it, I know you were THINKING it! I just KNOW you were!! You hate yourself and you think you’re better than everyone because your husband is white! WAAAAA!!”

This my friends, is the hybrid version of the GAT-DL (Guardians of All Things Dark & Lovely) who come out to defend the BC at any whiff of criticism. It’s almost like they feel some type of guilt at being interracially coupled and need to be hyper-down and sister-soldier-ish for fear that…what? Fear that their black friends, family and peers might think they’ve sold out because they are dating outside the race. It’s astounding to me that these women take so much mental and physical energy trying to police this blog and the fan page. Do they want cool-point cookies for being good little minions for the GAT-DL?

Cognitive Dissonance

I’m going to sink into the armchair and try to shrink the minds of these ladies for a sec. I believe that these interracial-dating apologists are experiencing cognitive dissonance. And to be empathetic, I can understand why. If these black women have been living under the BC Social Construct their entire lives and then have the NERVE to go outside the race and couple they may then try to resolve these conflicting issues by becoming hypervigilant on all things black-folk related.

Cognitive dissonance refers to a situation involvingconflicting attitudes, beliefs or behaviors. This produces a feeling of discomfort leading to an alteration in one of the attitudes, beliefs or behaviors to reduce the discomfort and restore balance etc. [SOURCE]

 

Leon Festinger (1957) proposed cognitive dissonance theory, which states that a powerful motive to maintain cognitive consistency can give rise to irrational and sometimes maladaptive behavior.  According to Festinger, we hold many cognitions about the world and ourselves; when they clash, a discrepancy is evoked, resulting in a state of tension known as cognitive dissonance. As the experience of dissonance is unpleasant, we are motivated to reduce or eliminate it, and achieve consonance (i.e. agreement).

Look sister-soldier GAT-DL apologists who are interracially coupled: Just because I don’t make excuses for foolishness means that I hate black men and women. I won’t list names because I don’t keep track, but I’ve helped TONS of black women in one way or another through this blog, so you can just suck eggs on that one, ummmkay? Please stop using me to work out your psychological issues!

My blog. My thoughts. My work. My success.

Don’t like it?

Get your own and leave me be.

Follow Christelyn on Instagram and Twitter, and subscribe to our YouTube channel. And if you want to be a little more about this online dating thing, InterracialDatingCentral is the official dating site for this blog.

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