I recently received a question from a 21-year-old girl who goes to a predominately white college that on it’s surface, doesn’t present many opportunities for interracial dating. As with most situations, the few blacks that attend cluster and socialize together so there’s not much social intermingling either. Coupled with that, today’s pathetic “Netflix and Chill” sex-uationships aren’t at all appealing to her.
I thought about when I was in college at Loyola Marymount University, and this young girl’s situation mirrored mine even back in the late 90’s. The black stayed huddled together, the young black men had so many women after them they could simultaneously run through each and commit to none. Instead of going to parties and dates, the black girls would spend their time in each other’s dorms relaxing each other hair or some other nonsense.
Me? I was all about the books, and that whole social scene was, I thought, below me, because I was an older student by a couple years, who’d worked a full time retail job and had an apartment, so I realized how shitty life could be without a college degree. I kept my GPA high and ignored my student mailbox full of invitations for dinners, charity events, and volunteer opportunities. I never went to the sport games. I was a complete shut in, and that part of the college experience I regret not having even to this day.
If I could have done it all over, here’s how I would have conducted myself socially, and maximized my opportunities to meet and mingle with men and women of all races:
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