Dating & Marrying Ethnic Men

George Lopez Follow Up: Should Black Women Date Latino Men?

I received this note from a Facebook friend. Definitely worth the share.
Whew do I have a lot to say about the GL debacle. I have spoken about Latinxs extensively over the past 2 weeks on FB and have commented on a few of your posts. I’m Melmendi Jones on FB – not my real name! 
A little background about me so you can contextualize my perspective. I’m 46 with a 22 yr old daughter. My mother is black and my father is a non blk Colombian. I’m engaged to a Latino man who is 1/2 Mexican and 1/2 Spainiard. I describe myself as a black Latina. I attached a photo of myself for context so you can see I understand this subject quite well from all sides.

Issue 1) The joke. He let the cat out of the bag and any Latinx in this country who says they’ve never had a family member express similar sentiments is either lying or comes from a rare unicorn family. My theory is GL realized he told the joke in “mixed company” and knew it wasn’t supposed to get out. Latinos are geniuses at faking solidarity. Rarely will they admit anti-blackness in public.
I was told that my fiancées mother cried when she found out her son was dating a black girl. She asked his family in Mexico to call him and talk sense into him. We’ve been together 6 years now and his mom admits she was not happy at all. In a nutshell- it’s the Latinas that don’t want their sons with black women. The fathers don’t want their daughter with bm but don’t mind bw with their sons. So yes it’s an issue for a lot of reasons. They see the status of bp in this country and assume they have a fighting chance if they can distance themselves. Latinos can be colorstruck – more than black ppl in my opinion and want each generation lighter – it’s called improve the race. Latinxs refer to me as dark which would make other bw what? Distorted view imo. Also Latin people are tribal. My Colombian father was not happy about me dating a Mexican. 
I read through the comments on your video and blog post and noticed how quiet your Latino followers are. Very interesting. It’s a land mine and they know it. So should you promote these relationships? YES!!! You weren’t expecting that were you?  Comparing men of other races (dated most) I find Latinos most open to dating and marrying bw. Why? The moms don’t like it but worship their sons and want them happy. My fiancés family loves me and would be devastated if we broke up. I love them as well. Latino men are passionate, sexy, family oriented, great dancers (important to me lol) and take pride in providing. BW should not let GL’s outburst scare them away from Latinos who show interest.
Issue 2) The reaction of GL to the bw. Subconsciously he had no fear of getting away with it. When does anyone get in trouble for insulting bw? He would have never addressed a Latina or WW that way. Never ever. GL has been around enough bm comedians to absorb  what they think about bw. No one is going to step up to defend bw. Definitely not bm, not Latinos who love bw, not Latinas (lol as if),  nobody.  We are on our own. Full stop. 
Issue 3) Current immigration problems with POC and their prior relationship to bp. I didn’t agree with some comments you made about immigration and how these groups are learning how it feels to be in our shoes. I’m not going to go into details here but you can go to my page and read my thoughts about that if you want. My basic point was there is no kinship – never was and never will be. It’s always been a one-sided. Recent developments won’t change that. A lot of white people are hostile and want them out but a lot of white people are sleeping in courts and marching for them. We’ve never had that level of support and that is why they will always take any support we give for granted. This is why I don’t  get worked up about immigration even though it matters a lot to my father and future husband. I have my own issues as a bw and I need my energy.
I have been meaning to email you for a while and tell you how interesting I think it is that swirling for women in my family is the rule and not the exception. That’s a long story I’ll have to go into another time.
Anywho, thank you for all you do and I do believe you are making a difference.
Much love to you and your beautiful family!
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