No Wedding, No Womb!

Open Thread: Is Fighting Against the Black 72% Out-of-Wedlock Rate a Lost Cause?

I got this note from a BB&W fan, who happens to be biracial (his mother is black, father is white). Richard often comes to the fan page to discuss topics of race and class, and I like having his perspective. But the note he sent me this morning moved me to action, and I’m lending him a larger platform because I think madness like this needs to be brought to light.

NWNW baby

Hey there, there’s something that’s been bothering me for a few days and I just thought of you.

We’ve always had fun back-and-forths, and I think we agree on most things… one thing in particular, is addressing the 72% out of wedlock birth rate among black children.

I’m beginning to think that this is a lost cause. I just got booted from a group called “The Extraordinary Journey of a Black Nerd” – which is a group for, well, black nerds.

One of the questions that a member posed was whether or not you’d stay with someone for the long haul if that person was dead set against marriage. Obviously, the talk of children eventually comes up. I bring up the OOW birthrate among black children… and watch the insults FLY! “Tom,” “Coon,” “house nigga,” etc, etc – which, by the way, are in violation of that groups rules. However… the admins actually made an exception for it in their case!

I didn’t expect this from a group from “black nerds,” but when I give it more thought; I should have. I think that when we look at your pages and discussion – we tend to get our hopes up, because all we see are mostly black people who agree with us. Because that’s who your pages are designed to attract.

But then reality sets in. It’s almost common sense – the 72% out of wedlock birthrate among blacks means that at least – AT LEAST – 72% of black adults don’t care, and don’t see anything wrong with it. Mind you, I’m saying “at least” because we haven’t even counted black adults who have yet to have children or black adults who do have children in wedlock, but are still oblivious to the 72% OOW birthrate among blacks.

With at least 72% of black adults not caring, attempting to do anything to rectify this is a losing battle.

I know I’m not really asking any questions or anything like that, but it hurt me to see what was in that group… and I figured if anyone would take time to listen, it would be you.


The idea that our “gifted” and black don’t think there’s a problem with the MAJORITY of black homes being absent of two parents is jarring, and I don’t blame Richard for feeling hopeless. Sometimes, I feel that way too. That’s why it’s essential for black women not to feel compelled to keeping their dating options only within the black community. Marry someone who shares your VALUES, and let the folks who don’t give a damn about how broken homes lead to chaos to stay where they are and eat themselves like the zombies they are.

But what’s most disturbing is that this cavalier attitude is coming from the so-called “black elite.” Folks think the OOW issue is one of “class,” but if the best of the best doesn’t care, then what is there left to discuss?

Meanwhile, while these idiots are calling black people who value marriage before family “coons”…

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