Question of the Week

Question of the Week: Why Do You Swirl?

I recently noticed a rather lengthy post from one of our male followers. I thought that I would share his post, with permission. I hope that you enjoy his story and that his questions spark a healthy and engaging discussion amongst our readers.


Question Time

Since my divorce 7 years ago, my dating preferences have leaned more and more to black women, to the point that it’s rare I date anyone else, and all my friends just kinda assume I only date black women. Which is fine with me. Black women have had a very significant impact in my life. I have theories for that. I’ll share if anyone is interested. 

However, I’m interested in the perspective of black women. Why do you or have you started dating white men, and where does that stand with you regarding preferences.  

The typical responses of “I don’t see color” don’t seem too deep or peeling back layers in most cases. I see color. Very, very clearly. How can you not. Deep shades of dark, dark black to light caramel. I see them all and relish them in each their own beauty. The race doesn’t matter to me, it’s the person comment also seems similarly to only open the door just a crack to peak inside. I think there is more.

What opened you up to the idea? In my childhood this would have been greatly frowned upon. My dad was Archie Bunker. Sorry to you youngins lol. My last long term partner’s father, long before me, asked her, why won’t you just date a black man? I know your story is different. 

I would love to hear it. Stream of consciousness, your thoughts, feelings, I’m fascinated by them all.

Full disclosure, a lot of men have been asking me about dating black women. “Why do I seem to prefer them, how does it work?” (I know right! lol How does it work?!? lol.  They seem perplexed when my answer is as simple as she’s cute, she thinks I’m handsome, we laugh, we play, we enjoy each other.) 

So I’m thinking of pulling some material together for white men who have an interest in black women and wondering if you’d be willing to help these men understand a few things. What are those things?


Thank you so much for your amazing contribution! Well ladies and gentlemen, the floor is yours. Let’s all share below! 

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