Black Women's Improvement Project (BWIP)

Sample Chapter Segment: What Does the Ideal Rainbeau NOT Look Like?

So I’m furiously pecking away trying to get The Book That Won’t Die done and I need my girls. I’m working on a chapter about vetting rainbeaus and I’m working on one particular section that’s niggling me. I think I’m right, but I don’t want to send this to my editor until I’ve done thorough reportage. After doing this gig for a year, there’s a few things that seem to have a common thread regarding the type of men some of you are happily paired with. But this isn’t for those who are already hooked up. It’s for the rest. Here’s a segment of my chapter and I want some honest feedback. Do you cosign on this? Has this been your experience?


Good Rainbeaus Beat to Their Own Conga

(copyright Christelyn Karazin 2011)

Coupled with an independent mind, the ideal man to forge a lasting relationship is often an oddball. And by “oddball” I don’t mean “crazy.” He probably wasn’t the most popular guy in high school, but he didn’t care. He’s the guy that might not have pledged for a fraternity in college because he thought they were just a bunch of dumb drunks. He’s not a social climber, doesn’t wear designer clothes, or get $100 haircuts. And most importantly, he’s not all too concerned about putting his career on the line for the love of his little black boo.

Let’s talk a bit about what the guy you shouldn’t be dating might look like. Beware of considering relationships with men who are obsessed with moving up the corporate ladder above all things. This guy golfs with his boss even though he hates the sport. He goes to every company-sponsored gathering to make sure he’s seen by the head honchos and takes note of the type of women on their arms, and wants to get one of those too. In other words, he lives and dies upon the approval of his superiors and what they think of him not only professionally, but personally. My advice? Stay away from these eager-to-please beavers, because if there is even a whiff of disapproval about him dating you, he’ll either hide you in the closet or dump you like a trash truck.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting an ambitious man. In fact, I encourage it. But a weak ambitious man will cave in because some coworker says, “Nice black chick you got there, but what will Mr. Big think? Don’t you have a promotion coming up?”


Just a section, do tell if this has been your experience.

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