Love Dumping |luv| |bämeng|

verb

Definition: When a romantic partner showers you with more attention, adoration and gifts than you’ve ever experienced and whats to be with you and talk to you all the time. Used as a strategy to achieve an objective: bag you, control you, own you–so the sociopath can fit you for a nose ring and exploit you as they please.

What guy does this?

I know this guy. He picks up chicks at the gas station because he owns a tow-trucking business. He’s kinda cute, has a nice white smile, beautiful cupid’s bow lips, but he’s a little too short and stocky for your taste, and since you too are short and stubby, you wish not to extend that curse upon your future progeny. But he’s charming, so you give him your number anyway, because what the hell, he might make a nice friend. He pursues you relentlessly–driving up in some fancy car to take you to some fancy restaurant, flowers at work, blah blah blah. A few months pass and you finally give in and sleep with him and he’s so good you think you saw The Creator with that last orgasm he gave you.  Midget kids be damned!!! You declare undying love and devotion, you find out he’s married. Which is why he needed your phone number, and why you only got the business card. These guys usually have exotic names, like “Armando.”

“Love Bombing” is one of several traits Donna Andersen, author of “Love Fraud: 10 Signs You’re Dating a Sociopath” gives to describe the common practices users and abusers use to, well…use and abuse you. Love bombing, along with an extremely edited version of a courtship is often done so dude can hurry up and muster enough trust so he can move into your place, eat your food and drive your car around all day while you’re at work.

“Sociopaths practice their attentiveness not only in person, but via communications media as well. This is what you need to understand about sociopathic over-communications: Multitudes of phone calls, texts and emails are not about keeping in touch. They’re about keeping in control. Later on, as sociopaths escalate control, they demand to know where you are and with whom. Should you fail to answer a call or respond to a text, you may be subject to punishment, ranging from an outburst of rage to the cold, heartless silent treatment–a dramatic change from over-the-top love bombing.”

This isn’t to say that every guy that comes along and showers you with affection and attention is a sociopath, and Anderson goes into detail about they other signs to identify, and along with offering a community and support through her site Lovefraud.com.