No Wedding, No Womb!

Why Bristol Palin Won’t Ever Be Called a ‘Baby Mama’

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - JULY 27:  Dancer Bristol Palin speaks onstage at the

BEVERLY HILLS, CA – JULY 27: Dancer Bristol Palin speaks onstage at the “Dancing with the Stars: All-Stars” panel during the Disney/ABC Television Group portion of the 2012 Summer TCA Tour on July 27, 2012 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

I’ve watched with interest as news outlets all over the world are reporting the second illegitimate pregnancy of Bristol Palin, daughter of once-presidential hopeful (and thank the gods she didn’t succeed) Sarah Palin. Once a spokesperson for abstinence, it’s reported that Bristol received $250,000 per year admonishing young people to not take the road of the more difficult and stressful single parent road by encouraging abstinence.

Two failed engagements and with the second child on the way, whose father Bristol refuses to name, the political world is left scratching their heads. How can this young woman be so damn dumb?

I’ll answer. Even with the out-of-wedlock rate rising with whites, it’s still only around 30%. Compare that to blacks, who have the highest out-of-wedlock rates, hovering around 72%. (So for all you  folks who want to say have the “white people do it too!” argument, you might just want to shut your mouth before you show yourself a fool.)

Bristol was quoted saying, “Tripp, this new baby, and I will all be fine, because God is merciful.” No honey. They’ll be fine not because God is merciful, but because your family is loaded. Stop fronting.

In short, a young white woman like Bristol Palin having two out-of-wedlock children is unusual for other white people who revolve around the Palin family’s socioeconomic status. Still, Bristol will more than likely never be called a ‘baby mama,’ and the reason is simple. She enjoys white privilege, and unlimited financial and familial resources. Her children will more than likely avoid the poverty, high drop out rates, low test scores, likelihood of prison and all the other ills associated with children born into single parent homes. What is more, the Palin clan is large and strong, and live a relatively isolated life in Alaska. As far as I know, there are no ‘hoods’ there. The only bullets the Palin offspring will be running from are from moose and bear hunters.

So why am I taking the time to make this distinction? Because this is an opportunity to highlight a fact of life that’s unfair, but nonetheless true: You as a black girl or woman of reproductive age can’t do what this white, rich, privileged girl is doing and expect the same outcome. Our kids fare far worse in such situations. Generations of single parenthood in the black community has left no safety net for mothers of such children. Taking your kids to ‘Big Mama’s’ house so they can see what an intact family and marriage once looked like has mostly gone the way of the dinosaur.

The most likely way to avoid poverty, build wealth, and create security for your offspring is still marriage. Even the most liberal of news outlets admits that children of single parents fare far worse than those of married parents.

Your goal as a good mother before the fact is to find a partner who displays competency. What does that mean? Here’s a list:

  • He is a college graduate. This shows that he values education and has the mental stamina to finish what he starts.
  • He is not mired in debt. He lives below or within his means, and he’s not trying to floss with an expensive car that costs more than his rent to lease.
  • He doesn’t have a criminal record. This is non-negotiable.
  • He doesn’t doesn’t have babies peppered all over the creation.
  • He saves his money.
  • He values family, and came from an intact home.
  • His five-year-plan doesn’t no consist of him becoming the next Jay Z or Eminem.

A man like this, regardless of race, gives you a better chance at avoiding the pitfalls of single parenthood and a life of struggling. Because the out-of-wedlock rate in the black community is astronomical, it’s essential that black women who want to create strong families and build wealth look ‘beyond the black.’


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