I normally wouldn’t do this, but I think this post is a perfect piggy back to Brenda55’s post about what this blog ever discusses black men. Interesting that a sorry, loser, bottom-feeding internet troll and stalker of mine has recently started nicknaming me “nappy head.” I find this hilarious, because not only is this man utterly disgusting to look at, he is also black. With nappy hair. And these fools wonder why so many black women are throwing up deuces.
I have a question for all the GAT-DL folks who think that THIS space is a bunch of self-hating black women desperate for rainbeaus. Riddle me this: Anyone know any Asian men who call their women “chinks?” White men calling white women “crackers? Mexican men calling their women “wetbacks?” Arab men calling their women “sand n-words?” Please tell me, what race of men attack the physical qualities of the women who bear them like black men do. I’ll wait.
And please, my black male friends and enemies alike, save coming on this thread ‘talkin bout how much you LOVE black women with natural hair. Save it, because until you all act like MEN and defend the honor of your OWN women to these a-holes, there is nothing else to be said.
Some of you who have been around know who this man is. Please do not mention him by name or give him any links. He’s a desperate man looking for validation and attention. Don’t give it to him. I only mentioned him to illustrate a concrete example of how black men and the black community at large work to kill the souls of black women, with the sole purpose of making them feel like crap so they believe that they deserve to be used, exploited, and even have violence imposed upon them. THAT IS WHY THIS SPACE IS A DUMB-ASS-NEGRO-FREE-ZONE, heavily moderated to keep the roaches a bay.
I know, there bottom feeders, criminals, who spreads AIDS, faster then them. Yeah sure we have nappy hair like them right?..who’s spreading AIDS..from South Africa to America..black women who mess with these people, die young. Who buys there lousy music,? us only to have Kim Kardashian in our faces, im not paying, not sleeping with them I hate these guys.
The white man still looks after his own, black men leave there children, hate there women, burgal there nieghbours homes and still want to be thought of as men?..seriously?…how about acting like men?….
And im not supporting there business….and ill support white owned business and black female businesses, and even Asian business..before theirs..atleat white men, and asian men dont hurt there own..give me white mans business whos feeding his white family anyday before any black mans business…
Oh yeah they can stop complaning abour Koreans selling our hair, we like it that way..atleast that money is not going to some black man..deauces!!!
@LuizaMabaso Those sell out kneegrow men don’t give a damn about our hair. Talk about catty, meow. You’d think some of them were jealous chicks competing with us for men. Whoops. LOL
@BWWOB @LuizaMabaso Yep, they express a preference for long hair, so many BW got weaves. Then, they say they hate weaves! Not-so-hidden message: they like long, straight/wavy/curly hair.
@Alana 2 @LuizaMabaso Thats an excuse.
CK
you mean those bitter b!tchy sociopathic sellout broke bum baby-daddy self hating down low crispy critter bed wenches pumping and dumping the slave masters daughter (SARCASM)? LOL I wrote a wild and crazy little ditty about them.
http://blackwomenwithotherbrothers.blogspot.com/2013/01/hot-fresh-satire-bitter-black-male.html
The one who looks like a gay cowboy with double fake bling in his ears dedicated an entire FB thread to my page, pure comedy.
@BWWOB O.M.F.G. you are hysterical!!! I’m dead.
*bled out on the couch*
@Statuesque @BWWOB
LMFAO it’s so spot on. I have seen ALL of these comments in some incarnation online.
@Statuesque Thank you 🙂 been a satirist all of my life.
@BWWOB DeeDee, I’m a boho chick born and raised in SF as well. What’s looking like a “gay cowboy” have to do with trollism? What if he were a “gay cowboy”, would it matter? Calling someone gay is not an insult in my world, but when people use it like you have in this instance, it sounds like one. That’s just my opinion.
@uninterracial Oh get over it. I laugh at you ladies trying to be so fair and stand up to another BW “boho chick” not to compliment her but to correct her, smdh. Let me qualify for ya, OK? A CLOSETED gay cowboy a man who trolls as a str8 bully colorist misogynist but his hiding a love for men. Or something like that is what I believe is happening here and over and over in Black America from BW bashers – bitter closeted men. Thats that take it for what you will. And I stand behind all my words all the time 🙂
@BWWOB So sorry that you can’t see my point, but you go ahead and do you. No hate from me.
Why do Asian men and white men have more… that because they support their people, why do black men pick on there own?…..urghhh..and anyway Asian men and white guys look better anyway!!! they walk taller more gentlemen like…
I’m at the point where I have totally left these men that think this way behind. They are beyond useless. I’m trying to figure out ways to better myself and the people I care about. Yet, the only things these idiots can do is troll a person on the damn internet! OMG. Sorry bunch of losers. These are the same men that want to complain about the “black community” falling apart and how the man is keeping them down. Yet, they want to do nothing about it but troll other people. Sorry bunch of losers they are indeed.
They can’t think that many of us would take them seriously. I firmly believe that black women are the movers and shakers in the black community. Yes, there have been black men that have made amazing strides for the betterment of black people. But the more I look at it, I think that black women are the ones that hold it down.
I mean, look at these men that are freaking out over fictional characters like Olivia on Scandal and Joanna on Deception choosing to be with men they care about. This totally gave it away that these people want to dominate black women and control black women because they know the power that we hold. Black women shouldn’t have to settle for bare minimum. I don’t mean that black men are the bare minimum. I’m talking about men regardless of race that are sub-par. Apparently, that is what these men think black women deserve. So that is why they troll so hard.
These men need to get over themselves. Why in the world would I or any woman with half a brain cell really go after a man that thinks the worst of us?????? Like seriously? Why would I waste my value on useless men that complain, yet want to do absolutely nothing to change anything. Or they expect black women to sacrifice everything, while the men sacrifice nothing. GTFOOHWTBS!
While they are rolling us, we are going to be doing amazing things in the world. So these people can shove it.
That. IS. ALL 😀
@BeautyIAM Preach!!
@BeautyIAM
Channeling @lawwanxi , there is an old Chinese saying “Kill the chicken in order to scare the monkey.” These trolls are attacking IR women NOT to change their minds, they know that won’t happen, but to trip up women on the fence who witness the attacks.
Why is is white men helping black women? to succeed in creating a more positive image for ourselves., Who is producing scandal?, who made Naomi Campbell, ?white men, they accepted women like Naomi camble,, before black men. The fashion world is white built community but whites men accept us, if it wasnt for whit men that Naomi Cambell was dating no one would have helped her. Black men keep pushing us to the side..well we are dropping his business’s
Wow.
Shall observe from afar.
AND ONE MORE THING ….http://imgur.com/dfeoSTF
@LuizaMabasoJust wanted to say, your profile pic is gorgeous!
@MrsGlam @LuizaMabaso Very photogenic! You could be a model. Of course, I never know when someone’s using their true picture anymore! LOL!
@LuizaMabaso
I thought the same thing. You are beautiful!
Whenever a BM takes issue with what a BW is doing, he attacks her appearance first. AND, normally, he attacks the very features he SHARES with her (dark skin, kinky hair.) It’s so transparent, it’s ridiculous.
@MrsGlam They also question her sexuality, femineity and chastity. It is all about shutting her down and control.
@Brenda55 @MrsGlam
Part of the reason is jealousy. I notice anytime a black woman is upwardly mobile and has no intentions of helping DBR blackistani trolls, she is attacked, relentlessly. Part if the reason is their way of thinking which is along the lines of “You just as black as me, why are you doing so much better?”. Attacking how a woman looks is a low blow, and a way to remind her she is still black and therefore worthless. If the woman is light or mixed, then the same attack happens only along the lines of “you still a nigga I don’t care how light you are. Trolls like this are self-haters with little to no self esteem. Deflecting and insulting is how they cope with their issues instead of being proactive getting anger management and counseling, a job and education(they are obviously unemployed if they have the time to troll 24/7) and fixing their lives.
“Please tell me, what race of men attack the physical qualities of the women who bear them like black men do. I’ll wait.”
Exactly! Even when a non-black man chooses to date or marry a woman of another race, they don’t spew hatred and vitriol towards their own women the way black men do. It’s so laughable and beyond stupid that those dbr black men would accuse us of self-hatred for marrying non-BM. Yet, they are the ones attacking the physical qualities which they also share.
“THAT IS WHY THIS SPACE IS A DUMB-ASS-NEGRO-FREE-ZONE, heavily moderated to keep the roaches a bay.”
Many of the sites “dedicated” to IR dating have a subtle pro black love theme to them. They speak on the importance of finding love beyond the color line and the importance of “sistas” finding love outside blackistan….. BUT we still love our “brothas”. This is one of the few blogs that provides bw a place to vent, share and learn without a disclaimer.
As someone said on Brenda’s piece, black men are known for gloating about their options, to anyone willing to listen. They say it and prove it every chance they get, they owe use nothing. Well, we heard and are right there with you…. we too have OPTIONS and don’t owe you anything.
We have options in where we live, the blogs we follow and support, in the way we rock our nappy hair, who we allow in our space and whether you like it or not, who we love and marry.
When you come to a blog like this one and the only questions ask by you, is how can you get us back (selfish bastard), and why we’ve chosen to jump ship in the “darkest” hours ( mind games! the minute we wise up and realize we too have options, all of the sudden it’s the “darkest” hours.. yeah, ok! well get you ass a flashlight). You’re starting to look real desperate. The more you push the issue the stronger our desire for anything but a black man grows.
@Lexi88
Why do these “options” they discuss seem to be the most attractive non-BW they can get?
Other qualities are important in a relationship like emotional intelligence, maturity and household-running skills such as budgeting and organizing. Why do some of these men choose women who on the surface to appear to have little to offer besides being a non-BW? The idea of marrying strategically seems lost on them — marrying the boss’ daughter, a woman whose family runs a business complementary to the BM’s business to promote vertical integration, or a woman who has many business and cultural contacts in the country a BM expat has moved to in order to take opportunity of foreign business opportunities. There is so much short-sightedness that is ridiculous, like people can barely think about 5 minutes into the future, much less the future of their children and grandchildren. And then, they have the nerve to say a BW must be a perfect 10 in every way for them to think about talking to her.
Note, I am not referring to BM who met their spouse in college or at work or something like that.
@Alana 2
“Why do some of these men choose women who on the surface to appear to have little to offer besides being a non-BW?”
Maybe they don’t really have so many options.
@Brice Cameron @Alana 2 True in some cases, but I’ve seen more than a few good-looking, outwardly successful BM’s with WW who are … uh … umm … visually displeasing.
@DWB
Maybe the women had a lot of other things going for them. But unfortunately, I think being white is often enough. It seems like for many black men, getting a white chick is the definition of success.
@Alana 2
Also, dudes of any race who have a lot of options don’t have to spend a lot of time trying to convince others.
Most men take cues from what is working and how their families can benefit. If we still have issues with other races , then we will not be able to receive the information they are offering. If someone have information to make my life better, then I want that information and then give back when I have something to share. Most groups of men are taught to be the bread winners and to take responsibility . I know you have your few idiots and that with any race but overall they are taught certain norms and if they do not follow them it is looked down on and not and their dysfunction is not celebrated like in the Black community or lack there of.
I don’t understand the self-hatred critique on either side for people who date out. If I hated myself I would subject my mind, body and soul to abuse, not seek out support, affirmation and love from people willing and able to provide them to me. If Black women are gravitating to people and situations that are uplifting and positive, that’s the opposite of self-hatred. It is an expression of self-love. I love myself enough to believe that I should be treated well and appreciated. I think every human being on earth deserves to feel this way.
When my White boyfriend tells me that he loves my natural hair and features there is no conceivable way to interpret my acceptance of those compliments as “self-hatred.” When he expresses his appreciation of my appearance it doesn’t mean that he hates his own hair and features. Sometimes you have to flip a script to see how illogical these concepts really are. After that, you realize that anyone who says or believes these things is not someone to take heed of, but someone to pity.
I am pretty far removed physically from Black men like this, but, more importantly, I am MENTALLY removed from them. Any engagement with them (little that there is) is undertaken very clinically, like I am an anthropologist studying an interesting human specimen, even if I am related to them. I am no longer emotionally invested in what this specimen thinks about me, no more than I am interested about what a duck or a spider whose behavior I am observing thinks about my hair or my nose. I was not born this way. I developed this detachment, and I developed it well before I started dating out, so it does NOT come as a consequence of dating out (though for some it does). It starts with realizing that you are FREE, these people have NO INFLUENCE over your behavior, and any engagement with them is VOLUNTARY. Yes, these things are true even if you live in Blackistan. If Victor Frankl (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor_Frankl) can disassociate himself from his Nazi captors in a death camp and find a healthy mental space, anyone who can’t simply pack up and leave these people behind can too.
@Statuesque “I am pretty far removed physically from Black men like this, but, more importantly, I am MENTALLY removed from them. ”
This is key.
@Statuesque
I am pretty far removed physically from Black men like this, but, more importantly, I am MENTALLY removed from them….. I say BRAVO!!!
True story, the past Sunday St. Patrick’s Day I am at the bus stop and this sort of decent looking, none threatening young Black male asks me for $2; not for bus fare but to buy him a beer. I gave him the side-eye and politely told him that I don’t carry cash. He was polite but went on criticizing all the rich White people in the area for being selfish because they were driving luxury vehicles but would not give him a couple of dollars for a beer. Well I jokingly told him that he should have been at the parade the day before because there were plenty of drunken people who would have been happy to buy him a beer. We laughed but the joke was on him. He had no idea how pathetic he was. A few years ago I would have been totally offended and angry by him but as this point I felt nothing. I was completing indifferent to this Black male and it felt good.
@cns @Statuesque This reminds me of when me and/or my friends pass random black men on the street while eating or drinking something and they will ask if they can have some. It used to upset me as well. But now I just laugh and say, oh no my brufa, you gots to get your own! rofl
@cns @Statuesque
It sounded that guy suffers from “help a brotha out” syndrome: the idea that because you happen to share the same skin colour, you are obligated to help him, therefore, supporting the black community.
@Statuesque “Man’s Search for Meaning” is one of my favorite books. When you mentioned the author, V. Frankel, I could see how his words could be helpful for any women trying to escape Blackistan.
If I recollect his story, the key to his survival was that he had a reason to live: To find his wife so he could reconnect with the woman he loved. It allowed him to endure when others gave up.
I applaud any women who can withstand the systemic hostility of Blackistan, and then find a way to escape. It is heroic. Not only do you create a life for yourself, but you become a powerful role model for others who might choose to escape themselves.
If there are a few guards of Blackistan (i.e. black men) who show enough compassion to help you escape — that is awesome. But do not confuse them with the purportedly friendly guards who say nice things for the purpose of persuading you not to leave your prison. Even though he might think he is a good guy because he treats you better than the other guards, he is doing you no favor if he is encouraging you to stay in a place where you are the prisoner.
@Statuesque
” It starts with realizing that you are FREE, these people have NO INFLUENCE over your behavior, and any engagement with them is VOLUNTARY.”
Carve this in rock. Once black women get their minds right an KNOW this on a cellular leveL they will have arrived. Love this whole post. Just love it.
@Statuesque
“”I am pretty far removed physically from Black men like this, but, more importantly, I am MENTALLY removed from them… I am no longer emotionally invested…It starts with realizing that you are FREE, these people have NO INFLUENCE over your behavior, and any engagement with them is VOLUNTARY….find a healthy mental space”
This is so on point…very important to do this!!! There is only one non dbr bm I really enjoy hanging out with occasionally (well, now he’s in the military) and that I could say truly respects me. This is not including family of course. I do have a few bm acquaintances (coworkers, former hs classmates) that I’m cool with, but either way, I’m not emotionally invested (I keep my distance..I’m not trying to date these people)… I say hi, bye, make jokes, have short conversation, and keep it moving, for the most part. Black men are not a big part of my life these days, so I’m starting to care less and less what the majority of them think. I’m just annoyed when I cross paths with DBR black men and I’m forced to deal with them.
I have always had natural hair, and long ago figured out it is a useful filter to avoid those who disapprove of West African features. In fact, when insulted about my hair, part of me feels a bit happy because it is often by people who are not going anywhere in life and i am not trying to impress them.
No other group of men so loudly and publicly and often denigrates women of his ethnic group. To find other men who do so, you’d have to search the internet, not live life–walking down the street, running errands, listening to the radio, watching television, etc.
@Alana 2
“No other group of men so loudly and publicly and often denigrates women of his ethnic group. To find other men who do so, you’d have to search the internet, not live life–walking down the street, running errands, listening to the radio, watching television, etc.”
Good point, girlfriend. It’s really pathetic. But remember to be positive by not allowing ignorant individuals to take your joy.
@Alana 2 “In fact, when insulted about my hair, part of me feels a bit happy because it is often by people who are not going anywhere in life and i am not trying to impress them”
Wow, this is exactly how I feel!
These trolls are absolutely relentless. The saying is don’t get even, but be successful or live well. The trolls see black women are not on black-men centic sites begging for love, and that fact alone is eating them alive. They see that black women are living well with out them and have created internet neighborhoods where other black women can express themselves w/o getting shouted down. It’s the equivalent of “white flight”.
I was on another IRR blog and the author of site stated how the trolls try to shut the site down by sending emails with virus to her readers/commenters. If she blocks the troll’s account, they change their accounts only to try and derail her site again. All that energy and effort to shut up black women instead of uplifting her.
SUCH TACTICS ARE ABOUT CONTROL.
I notice when black men attack black women they attack the same features they share with her, e.g. nappy hair, black skin, big lips. I have yet to hear a non-black men speak ill of his women. Wilt Chamberlain, Reggie Jackson (baseball player), Wesley Snipes are just a few of the black men who have publicly demonized black women. I’m sure there are more but I am no longer interesed in the sports/hip hop/celebrity scene since they contribute little to the community. I cannot think of any prominent white male who dates,or is married to black women including those who do so exclusively, who speak ill of their women.
@mzsunshine “I cannot think of any prominent white male who dates,or is married to black women including those who do so exclusively, who speak ill of their women.”
Like you, I’ve never encountered another white or non-BM that has dated or married a woman of another race, that puts down the women of his own race. My husband doesn’t put down white women just because he’s married to me – a black woman. For my husband to put down ww, would mean putting down his mother, sister, grandmothers, aunts, female cousins, the wives of his friends. Only black men seem to have this issue. It makes it seem as if the motivation for black men dating out have more to do with their contempt towards black women than they’re actual desire and love for their non-black mate.
@The Working Home Keeper
It makes it seem as if the motivation for black men dating out have more to do with their contempt towards black women than they’re actual desire and love for their non-black mate.
I agree. We were discussing interracial dating/marriage at my ex-husband’s parents house. My youngest sister-n-law who just graduated from college mentioned how when black man date out they put down black women as to the reason why. I was so surprised that she was aware of this trend.
I recall an interview with Whoopi Goldberg where she was asked why did she just date white men. She responded “they’re the ones that ask me out”. She did not go into a diatribe that black men aren’t this or that.
@mzsunshine @The Working Home Keeper
Their hatred of our features are passed on to their sons like an inheritance. My daughter attends a predominately Asian H.S , she is thin, stands at 6-feet,1-inches, and wears her hair natural. The few black boys at her school, think it is their right to tell her how to wear her hair. One kid told her wearing her hair natural is unattractive, especially for a girl her height and don’t understand why black girls are all following this “stupid” trend. They are not friends, only sees this idiot once in a blue moon when he shows up for class, yet he felt the need to school her on what “looks good”.
My daughter had no problem telling him how “attractive” he would look, if he pulled his pants up and stop walking around with his butt hanging, giving an open invitation to all wanting to tap his booty. And, come to class more than twice a month to avoid being yet another statistic.
We need to train our daughters young, because their hatred for us will be passed on.
@Lexi88 @mzsunshine @The Working Home Keeper Your daughter sounds like me in high school, except I hadn’t stopped relaxing my hair. I was verbally abused daily by a group of boys just like this. Good for her for standing up for her and good for you. You have trained her well!
@Statuesque @mzsunshine @The Working Home Keeper
Thank you! she’s very aware of their games and has no problem calling them out.
@Lexi88 @mzsunshine @The Working Home Keeper “The few black boys at her school, think it is their right to tell her how to wear her hair. One kid told her wearing her hair natural is unattractive, especially for a girl her height and don’t understand why black girls are all following this “stupid” trend. ”
Geez, we are teaching them at a young age to act like this? Ugh. So maybe that is where we have to start to change this…
@Lexi88 @mzsunshine @The Working Home Keeper “My daughter had no problem telling him how “attractive” he would look, if he pulled his pants up and stop walking around with his butt hanging, giving an open invitation to all wanting to tap his booty. And, come to class more than twice a month to avoid being yet another statistic. ”
Good for her….
@The Working Home Keeper @mzsunshine
Their hatred of our features are passed on to their sons lkie an inheritance. My daughter attends a predominately Asian H.S , she is thin, stands at 6-feet,1-inches, and wears her hair natural. The few black boys at her school, think it is their right to tell her how to wear her hair. One kid told her wearing her hair natural is unattractive, especially for a girl her height and don’t understand why black girls are all following this “stupid” trend. They are not friends, only sees this idiot once in a blue moon when he shows up for class, yet he felt the need to school her on what “looks good”.
My daughter had no problem telling him how “attractive” he would look, if he pulled his pants up and stop walking around with his butt hanging, giving an open invitation to all wanting to tap his booty. And, come to class more than twice a month to avoid being yet another statistic.
We need to train our daughters young, because their hatred for us will be passed on.
@mzsunshine
I’m glad you brought this up, b/c I thought it was just me and I was missing something. The few times I come into contact with the media and they’re asking these men about their significant others who are of another race/ethnicity, they always talk about their race or compare them to black women whom they dislike. It’s never “I was so smitten by her” or “I just love her so much”, not even saying how they met or how he found her attractive.
To me, that sucks, and I not only do not envy such couples, but I feel sorry for any woman that is in a relationship with someone because specific type of women unrelated to her do x, y, and z, not b/c he cares about her 🙁
@mzsunshine “I was on another IRR blog and the author of site stated how the trolls try to shut the site down by sending emails with virus to her readers/commenters. If she blocks the troll’s account, they change their accounts only to try and derail her site again. All that energy and effort to shut up black women instead of uplifting her.”
Wow. O_o
This is what I don’t understand about self hating black men. I have no problem with interracial relationships, but why do you have to bash someone who looks like you? “I don’t want her too dark, I don’t like nappy hair.” When THEY THEMSELVES are black as a purse with kinky hair! I knew a guy who wouldn’t date anyone darker a “high yellow” (I hate those terms but I want you to get where I’m coming from). And yet he himself was one of the darkest people I have ever seen. And not the beautiful silky dark skin like Sudanese, but really ashy skin. Maybe if he took the time to put lotion and shea butter on, he would appreciate his skin tone more. He HATES himself. Why can’t he just date who he likes? Why do you feel the need to bash people who look like you in order to feel better about yourself? There is not an ounce of logic or reasoning with these men.
And you know what’s funny? When he saw me with a white guy, he looked ready to kill. The threats and harassing were ironic and hypocritical as hell.
LOL @ “black as a purse”
lmao to death @ “maybe if he put lotion AND shea butter on”…daaayuum…he thought it was better to be all sedimentary and crusty than to take care of the skin he was in?!?!?!
@KinkyBottleBlonde00
“Maybe if he took the time to put lotion and shea butter on, he would appreciate his skin tone more.”
“all sedimentary and crusty”
LMAO!!! Yall are killing me over here!!!
“Please tell me, what race of men attack the physical qualities of the women who bear them like black men do. I’ll wait.”
Well Black men also like to call each other the n-word as an insult AND a sign of affection (?) and call their own women h*** and bi*****. Other men do not do anything of the sort. That’s self-hatred right there. It’s really messed up.
@Elegance
So true! What self respecting black man wouldn’t mind being called the N word? And any time there’s a ww celebrity who was dumb enough to post bout chillin with her n****’s the first one to jump up and explain to everynody that it’s ok is the black man!
@Elegance “Well Black men also like to call each other the n-word as an insult AND a sign of affection (?) and call their own women h*** and bi*****. Other men do not do anything of the sort. That’s self-hatred right there. It’s really messed up. ”
Speaking as a WM….. We dont do that, and I have never understood it in the BC and why BM do that. I IS really messed up…
For many women, nappy isn’t even an insult. I fully embrace my nappy, curly, beautiful hair that I can do many styles with. So really Negro, get a clue. Many of us love how we look like, nappy hair and all.
@BeautyIAM
I fully embrace my nappy, curly, beautiful hair that I can do many styles with.
Exactly! I will be embracing my nappy, curly beautiful hair this week when I go for my “initial ” cut.
@mzsunshine @BeautyIAM Congrats. Ayurveda + commercial products is the truth. :o)
@mzsunshine
That’s great to hear! Keep us updated on your progress.
@BeautyIAM
“or many women, nappy isn’t even an insult. I fully embrace my nappy, curly, beautiful hair that I can do many styles with. So really Negro, get a clue. Many of us love how we look like, nappy hair and all.”
Thank you! since when was wearing my natural God given hair insulting?
Women believe that mess and torture their hair and scalp to please black men.
They will go as far as wearing a blond wig/weave for the rest of their lives to please those fools.
We haven’t seen Mary J Blige’s real hair color in 20+ yrs….That’s a problem!
@Lexi88 @BeautyIAM
The hair thing is a whole OTHER topic! Like when BM & BW see you going natural wearing your GOD given hair they nearly have a heart attack! You wearing your hair like that? How you gonna get a job? When really nobody gives a crap about your natural hair and the only people you will hear to say something bad about it are 99.9% of the time black people! And you’ll hear this from black people you thought were open minded and enlightened hell they even grew up with an Afro! The kicker too is when you stop putting perms and all sorts of chemicals in your hair it grows like crazy all that weave wearing and damage you do, if you stopped ironically you’d in no time have that thick long healthy hair your trying to attain by wearing wigs. Not bashing the relaxed ladies just saying from my own and many natural friends experience.
@Lexi88 @BeautyIAM
“You wearing your hair like that? How you gonna get a job? When really nobody gives a crap about your natural hair and the only people you will hear to say something bad about it are 99.9% of the time black people!”
Exactly. I’m kind of annoyed with the concern trolling from other black people when it comes to natural hair. Even my own mother (who is natural but still doesn’t seem fully comfortable with it) loves to go on and on about how white people may look at you differently when you have natural hair…and warns me how it may be difficult to get a professional job….ok…. I know plenty of bw with natural hair who are just fine in that department. I get plenty of compliments from white people on my hair (old and young). I just sit there like “ok”. Well, it’s my hair that grows out of my scalp. I’m not changing that for anyone, black or white. I appreciate the “warning”, but what is the purpose of continually warning me, since I have no plans to relax my hair again. There are also ways to wear natural hair that are considered more conservative (pulled back) so even if I can’t rock a big fro to work, I’m still keeping it natural.
Not saying there aren’t instances where people aren’t judged in the workplace or elsewhere because of their natural hair, .because there are…..but I don’t think natural hair is as much of a setback as other black people would like you to believe (or try to scare you into believing). It’s black people (especially black men) who express the most disapproval .but that’s on them…
@Lexi88 @BeautyIAM
“You wearing your hair like that? How you gonna get a job? When really nobody gives a crap about your natural hair and the only people you will hear to say something bad about it are 99.9% of the time black people!”
Exactly. I’m kind of annoyed with the concern trolling from other black people when it comes to natural hair. Even my own mother (who is natural but still doesn’t seem fully comfortable with it) loves to go on and on about how white people may look at you differently when you have natural hair…and warns me how it may be difficult to get a professional job….. I just sit there like “ok”….I know plenty of bw with natural hair who are just fine in that department. I get plenty of compliments from white people on my hair (old and young). It’s my hair that grows out of my scalp. I’m not changing that for anyone, black or white. I appreciate the “warning”, but what is the purpose of continually warning me, since I have no plans to relax my hair again. There are also ways to wear natural hair that are considered more conservative (pulled back) so even if I can’t rock a big fro to work, I’m still keeping it natural.
Not saying there aren’t instances where people aren’t judged or treated differently in the workplace because of their natural hair, .because there are…..but I don’t think natural hair is as much of a setback as other black people would like you to believe (or try to scare you into believing). It’s black people (especially black men) who express the most disapproval .but that’s on them…
@BeautyIAM I like black hair as well..I actually blog about it
@BeautyIAM
I remember an older friend of mine telling me that a new black hair stylist wanted to relax her already naturally curly hair explaining that if she relaxed it she wouldn’t have to blow dry it straight. She politly decline. The queen goes on telling her that if she got a relaxer her hair wouldn’t be so nappy. She told him, I quote “I am black, my hair is supposed to be nappy”. I will remember that for the rest of my life.
Those type of guys are so damaged. The only recourse is to leave them in the gutter where they belong.
“DUMB-ASS-NEGRO-FREE-ZONE.”
the the Blog Mistress has spoken. 😀
“DUMB-ASS-NEGRO-FREE-ZONE.”
the Blog Mistress has spoken. 😀
“THAT IS WHY THIS SPACE IS A DUMB-ASS-NEGRO-FREE-ZONE, heavily moderated to keep the roaches a bay.”
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ROTFLMAO. :,oD
I’m sorry but that was funny.
If I come off as a bandwagon jumper, that still does not discredit the things I’ve said here so far concerning this problem.
Well I hope being called nappy isn’t supposed to be an insult because I LOVE my nappy hair and so do ww & WM! They can’t keep their hands out my hair always complimenting my hair. I’m fully natural my hair is the longest & healthiest it’s ever been! I have an ad online and about the same amount of white vs black men contact me. But when the black man contacts he says oh ok I’m liking the natural look vs white man who says you are so gorgeous. It’s like the brothas feel like oh ok I’ll give you a pass I gotta admit it looks good. Please, I don’t need any man to condone anything I do if you don’t like it you can kick rocks.
This topic reminds me of that movie Something New with Sanaa Lathan & Simon Baker. She was torn between the love of her white man who accepted her for who she was and her natural hair vs her black man who needed her to perm or weave STAT! Good movie I need to watch again soon.
That scene where he encourages her to take the tracts out was one of may favorites … when the WM told her he wanted to see what she looked like (naked) ie… the REAL her I just so loved and related to.
@DWB I loved that scene as well!
mzsunshine 1534 pts
These trolls are absolutely relentless. The saying is don’t get even, but be successful or live well. The trolls see black women are not on black-men centic sites begging for love, and that fact alone is eating them alive. They see that black women are living well with out them and have created internet neighborhoods where other black women can express themselves w/o getting shouted down. It’s the equivalent of “white flight”.
I was on another IRR blog and the author of site stated how the trolls try to shut the site down by sending emails with virus to her readers/commenters. If she blocks the troll’s account, they change their accounts only to try and derail her site again. All that energy and effort to shut up black women instead of uplifting her.
SUCH TACTICS ARE ABOUT CONTROL.
I am taking the liberty of pulling mzsunshine’s post up top.
I like that she calls black woman’s spaces on the internet, Internet Neighborhoods.
I like the white flight analogy. It is dead on.
Most of all I like this. Her explanation of just what the deal is with the trolls. To shut down black woman’s ability to freely and safety talk to each other.
Now I know some of our readers have blogs of their own. And some other readers visit those sites on occasion. They can be a chore to moderate and keep free of bile. Boy do I know that. I do this here however because I love this site, believe in it’s mission and because Chris is all that and a bag of chips and is pleasure to work with.
So I am making a suggestion to those who read here and have your own sites. Ever think of appointing moderators for your own sites? You readers who frequent other sites ever think of stepping up and being mods.
Having an internet “Town Watch” for black woman’s sites will help keep our communities beautiful, free and open the share our thoughts and ideas.
@Brenda55
To make things even cleaner on sites like youtube when we see IRR videos we should report the trolls and racist comments, instead of engaging/arguing with them(because that is what they want) just hit report.
We should also consider a collective wall of shame, if we get nasty emails we should post them their along with the perps e-mail addresses and websites, nasty tweets and facebook messages could also go there.
I just don’t care. Seriously I don’t even consider myself one of “their women”. FOH dude.
How can you be sure it was a Black man? This is the internet. One can use any photo to make their statement. I agree – whoever made the statement was very ignorant, of course.
@Alene How do I know? Because I know who he is, that’s why. It’s the internet, but you can’t hide everything. I make it my business to know who my enemies are.
@Christelyn
Fair enough. I had to question it. I’ve heard many non-Black men speak with the same sentiment. Now, of course it’s a hell of a lot worse coming from our counterparts, but let’s not act as if other men don’t have complexion/hair/weight preferences as well.
@Alene No, but we’re not talking about other races of men right now, are we?
@Alene @Christelyn “let’s not act as if other men don’t have complexion/hair/weight preferences as well.”
This is why so many black women are behind the ball. All that time spent going on about people who don’t want them. Who the heck CARES? Use your common sense: Associate with people who will make good members of your support system.
Instead, black women sit around and make excuses for men who abuse them, especially men who are black. How sad is it that a topic like this has black women coming into apologize for black men because “non-black men put us down to.”
A LOT of people put down black women when given the opportunity. This is not news to any black woman. But what black women haven’t been doing is focusing their energy on getting away from such poisonous persons instead of trying to be “fair” to them.
BTW, I can also affirm that the man in question is black. A better question is why you as a black woman need the receipts? The truth is out there, Scully.
@Alene @Christelyn *in to
@Alene @Christelyn *too
OMG, my brain is melting. 😐
@Alene @Christelyn
“let’s not act as if other men don’t have complexion/hair/weight preferences as well.”
Other men do.
And?
@Alene @Christelyn
OH gosh, must we go over this again?! @Alene please see Brenda’s piece written yesterday, and scroll down to the 25+ comments stating the obvious today.
This conversation is about BLACK MEN, whether or not other races of men do it too, is not up for discussion, per the disclaimer written by the creator of the blog.
Here’s an idea, create your own blog and let em’ rip.
@Lexi88 @Alene @Christelyn
“This conversation is about BLACK MEN, whether or not other races of men do it too, is not up for discussion, per the disclaimer written by the creator of the blog.
Here’s an idea, create your own blog and let em’ rip.”
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5c0vshX0S1rtlo61o1_500.gif
@Brenda55 But just to extend the assertion that “other races do it too” and some black men are either leading the pack, piling on, or saying nothing, how exactly does this make black men look honorable and chivalrous protectors of THEIR women?
@Christelyn It doesn’t. It is not meant to. That is not the point. The point is to inform you that you can expect no better from anyone else so suck it up and pipe down.
@Lexi88 @Alene @Christelyn
This conversation is about BLACK MEN, whether or not other races of men do it too, is not up for discussion, per the disclaimer written by the creator of the blog.
Here’s an idea, create your own blog and let em’ rip.
Thank you, Lexi88!
@Toni_M @Alene @Christelyn Thank you so much for the X-Files reference!
@Christelyn @Brenda55 You look great in the avatar, very “Dorothy Dandridge” (big smile).
Well whatever. I love my hair, and I refer to it as nappy proudly. My hair texture is unique and beautiful. And nobody can make me feel bad about it.
How dare he? What an idiot. Poof! Be gone.
Everybody loves my hair when it’s natural. I mean.. Errbody. lol
Well of course not everybody.. but nobody has ever told me that my hair is nappy and it sucks. lol
Some creepy dude was looking at my afro through the electronics aisle.. I caught him and it was so hilarious.
Black men who say these things about their women only make THEMSELVES look bad.
Have you even noticed when black women speak about black men they speak of REAL ISSUES, while black men talk about our hair and skin and ‘attitudes’? Dat shh be Suspect than a motherflipper.
I just wanted to share with you some of the foolishness they you all miss out on from the trolls that attempt to infest the site.
Just banned this idiot a few seconds ago. What can you say to this? SMDH
BlackDickLover 15 minutes ago from livefyre My Story: Jumping the Broom with a “White” Boy
No need to jump the broom with a white boy. There are plenty of educated, sophisticated, marriage minded “Black” men of African, Caribbean, Middle Eastern and South American descent. The pale skin horse should never be considered a savior, because the Black American stallion has not arrived. There are plenty of beautiful, strong and loving black men of the African diaspora ready to wife you in this world. Get out more, travel more. But, one thing I tip my hat off to Black men is honesty. Black men usually do not settle, they won’t just marry anybody. If Black men are not ready to settle down and still want to play the field, they won’t marry. If this is not the woman they want to spend the rest of their life with, they won’t wife her. On the other hand, White men marry because it is what’s expected and then cheat. Marriage to white men are laden with affairs and they are prostitute mongers…
For the record, there is nothing wrong with marrying black and having black babies. This blog further perpetuates the destruction of the black family and black people. Every other culture puts their women and men on a pedestal, except for us. This blog is ran and supported by women with a trove inferiority complexes. It is a disgrace and utter embarrassment to black people. With mindsets like this, Blacks are destined to remain the permanent underclass.
@Brenda55
His handle alone tells just how ignorant he is and who has the “inferiority complex”.
@Brenda55
and oh yeah, your service as moderator is soooooo appreciated!!!!!!!!
@mzsunshine @Brenda55 That is a black woman, because a BM would not go around calling himself “BlackDickLover” unless that rant was littered with the words “no homo”.
It may be hard to believe that there are black women out there content to be used and discarded like toilet paper, but they really do exist. It’s tragic, but it’s a tragic reality.
I cant with this forum right now, i need to work!! Lol .You guys keep me coming back!..since I found you..I check in a few maybe more times a day. Funny how when you pray you get what want. I prayed to find an intresting black womens magazine, and I did THANKS to whoever started this mag I’m loving it
@Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55 Some people just have a sick masochistic streak in them. But if this person truly loves black dick what are they doing on a site devoted to black women interested in white men? I’m sure there are plenty of porn websites where he/she can drool over Black mens’ penises and leave the intelligent women alone!
@CAPT SMOOTH @Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55 Oh the Black Man dick myth. Dr Oz has video on youtube show the average size in America of all men is 7 in. As a man who spent 8 yrs in the army reserve in the old WW2 barracks we got to see every ones junk The junk ranges from small to large of all races. I was always told “It’s not the size but how you use it”. Anyway that’s my 2 cents.
@tonyrog @CAPT SMOOTH @Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55
“I was always told “It’s not the size but how you use it”. Anyway that’s my 2 cents.” (I take it in response to the troll “blackdicklover”.)
Sounds good but not my reality, bwahahahaha. It’s the motion of the ocean but also the size of the ship, you can’t come at me with no dingy, you’d betta come with the QE2 cruise liner, bwaaaahahahaha, I wants to enjoy my ride, ya heard? Bwaahahahahahaa.
@tonyrog @CAPT SMOOTH @Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55
Dinghy
http://www.dinghy.com.au/
QE2
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queen_Elizabeth_2
(Sorry for being a tad nutty today).
@DeepWater @tonyrog @CAPT SMOOTH @Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55 Today? 😉
@DWB @tonyrog @CAPT SMOOTH @Toni_M @mzsunshine @Brenda55
Bwaaaaahahhaaaa, Well? A bit nuttier than usual, LMAO, bwaaahahahahaha!
@Brenda55
WOW! there are no words!
@Lexi88 @Brenda55 You took the words right out of my mouth. lol
@Brenda55 He or she lost me with the username. It’s hard to take anything else they say seriously when your username itself is trolling. Seriously? LOL. But yes thank you Brenda for all your work as a moderator.
@Brenda55
If black men only marry when they really want to, then why do their marriages fail especially with ? Especially high profile? Why do black men leave kids all over the place?
@Butterfly12 @Brenda55 She can’t hear you over the sound of her screaming “LA LA LA LA LA LA” to the top of her lungs with her fingers in her ear.
@Brenda55 who is ”blackdicklover”? LOL this forum quite something…LOL..let them keep it when it goes wandering as they do always, they will be back here to ask how to get a white guy! SMDH right now
@Brenda55
Well I do have words for blackdicklover15 and people who think like her. Nobody here cares about everything you have said. I am well aware that there are African, Carribean, and Middle Eastern men I can date. However, I choose MY RIGHT to exercise whomever I want to date. You don’t have the right to tell me who suits me best because guess what? You don’t know me. You don’t pay my bills. You DON’T SUPPORT ME. You don’t own my mind. The only persons mind you own is your own.
So to come here and chastise people for doing what they have the right to do is laughable. Its crazy women like yourself that have men thinking that all they have to do is the bare minimum and then they are a good man or a KING. LOL. So since you place so much value on a man’s race rather then his character, all these men need to do is show up and you’ll take him. He can be a cheater, a druggie, a high school drop out, but yet, because the man in black (or in your case, a person of color) he is acceptable. Good job.
Mindsets like blackdicklover15 has never intimidated me because I know where that mindset can lead some women. Pissed off at the world! LOL.
She claims we are an embarrassment to black people. hahaha…right. What’s really embarrassing is black women going on national television talking about how black men don’t want them. This leads the doors open for bona fide pimps like Steve Harvey and Tyrese to write pathetic books that are beyond sexist. Black women run out to support these pimps. Re-effin-diculous.
“But, one thing I tip my hat off to Black men is honesty. Black men usually do not settle, they won’t just marry anybody. If Black men are not ready to settle down and still want to play the field, they won’t marry. If this is not the woman they want to spend the rest of their life with, they won’t wife her. On the other hand, White men marry because it is what’s expected and then cheat. Marriage to white men are laden with affairs and they are prostitute mongers…”
But THIS statement right here is a killer. Homegirl, stop. A man’s race is not going to dictate his probability of infidelity. This is what I call chicken head mentality. How many young black women are walking around with multiple children by different black men????
For anyone that thinks this way, don’t come here and insult our intelligence with BS.
@BeautyIAM @Brenda55 What is also embarrassing…a screen name like black dick lover LOL!
@The Working Home Keeper @Brenda55
YES Indeed! I was like “oh, I could have sworn that was the name of a porno I saw at a sex shop.”
@The Working Home Keeper @Brenda55
Let me guess, her e-mail address is blackdicklover@aol.com
hahaha. What even more embarrassing is still having an aol account.
@The Working Home Keeper @Brenda55
Let me guess, her e-mail address is blackdicklover@aol.com
hahaha. What’s even more embarrassing is still having an aol account.
(1) There are plenty of educated, sophisticated, marriage minded “Black” men of African, Caribbean, Middle Eastern and South American descent.
Obviously he isn’t one just by that articulate, thought-provoking dissertation that followed the statement (sarcasm). So typical of the troll to tje sexual prowess of the black man as a valid reason to desire him. Notice how he never mentioned how beneficial it would be for black women to stick with our black “kang” based on the wonderful business infrastructure he has built. It is all about what was in the black man’s pants. SMH
(2). Get out more, travel more. We do and have. That is why we realize we have “options” other than what his ilk has to offer.
(3)Wtih mindset like this, Black are destined to remain the permanent underclass. Oh yes with the high rate of black male on black male killings, incarceration rate, high black male high school drop out statistics, and domestic murders he has a point.
@mzsunshine “Notice how he never mentioned how beneficial it would be for black women to stick with our black “kang” based on the wonderful business infrastructure he has built.”
Because black people have allowed the “Mandigo Negro” stereotype created by white racism to continue to be perpetrated as a psychological consolation prize. To make it worse, black women are walking around thinking that a penis is how a woman is supposed to choose a worthy mate.
Shaking my freaking head.
See, you just made my point. This IS the internet. Here we are discussing hair and along comes a white guy using this as an opportunity to bring up the N-word. Stay on topic, please.
@EarthJeff
See, you just made my point. This IS the internet. Here we are discussing hair and along comes a white guy using this as an opportunity to bring up the N-word. Stay on topic, please.
@Alene @EarthJeff “along comes a white guy”
EarthJeff is a part of our community here and a contributor to the site. He didn’t just show up out of nowhere. Plus, he was responding to another commenter who mentioned the n-word.
@Alene @EarthJeff
So quick to pounce on the white guy. Record time. One wonders if Jeff’s melanin content were higher……..?. Well I digress.
Take a seat Alene. You missed the quote marks in Jeff’s post.
Basic grammar. Punctuation matters.
@Alene
How did that make your point? It seemed that your point was that a person on the internet can claim to be someone else and that some white men don’t like ethnic features. Earth Jeff clearly identified himself as white and I think I can safely say that he thinks black women look beautiful, because he has expressed such sentiments in the past and he is in a relationship with a black woman. So it seems to me that he made the opposite of your point, unless you think he was a black man claiming to be white.
@Brice Cameron @Alene “How did that make your point? ”
Alene is a troll who is looking to poke holes in this community because they are mad that this is a space where black women are free to communicate and not use disclaimers, not be shut down in order to praise black manhood, and above all, unapologetically state that we desire to pair with, in some cases exclusively, non-black men.
You have no idea how pissed off that makes some people, so they sit and lurk, looking for any opportunity to show that, “See, white men are all racists. Nobody wants your black self. Black men are the only ones…except they don’t want you either and that’s either your fault or the fault of slavery.” Whatever foolishness they are trying to peddle these days.
Somehow sitting in this space despite hating everything it stands for is a valid way to spend their time, rather than move on to a black man/black woman dating site or other type of space. I will never understand DBR logic.
@Brice Cameron @Alene “Earth Jeff clearly identified himself as white and I think I can safely say that he thinks black women look beautiful, because he has expressed such sentiments in the past”
I did. Interestingly, I got hammered over that one too. Geez…. cant live with ’em, cant live without ’em…… And I will never understand…. Mars and Venus….
@EarthJeff @Brice Cameron @Alene
” Interestingly, I got hammered over that one too. Geez….”
Sorry, Earth Jeff. I still feel bad for helping to derail your post way back when (well, it wasn’t that long ago)….and taking place in some of the hammering…you may not remember, but, yeah, I’m calling myself out lol. I think we all knew you meant no harm, but we were getting out other frustrations that had nothing to do with you.
@Alene @EarthJeff I do not have the patience today, and it’s clear that you have no interest in this space. This is indeed the internet. Feel free to navigate back to the nearest black love site.
o/ Bye.
@Toni_M @Alene @EarthJeff Good show. Lets keep our community clean.
@Alene @EarthJeff
I see that you’re new. All you need to do is to look back at some of the old posts to see EarthJeff has been here forever…
Also, why does tonyrog always like stuff, but NEVER comments? Makes me laugh all the time.
@BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff Because I am a 78 yr old wm who worked at a multiracial Post Office for 35 yrs and have seen the things discussed on this blog. I just happen to agree with most.
@tonyrog @BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff Hi @tonyrog ! I appreciate the likes 🙂 Post more, lurk less!
@tonyrog @BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff
Would love to “hear” from you every once in a while… But likes are definitely appreciated!
@tonyrog @BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff
If you are 78 then you probably have some wisdom to share
@Lexi88 @tonyrog @BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff Agree with the ladies Tony … please share more of your wisdom!
@tonyrog @BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff *takes a photo for posterity*
@tonyrog Well I’m not your age yet, but I just took an early retirement from the Post Office after 30 years myself.
@CAPT SMOOTH It will be 23 yrs since I retired this Sept. Now the PO is dead from congress screw ups. I did see a lot of changes during my time from a all male work force to affirmative action. I am proud to get the 1st gay woman promoted to a Management position.
@tonyrog Congratulations! Don’t be a stranger. This is a fun group!
@CAPT SMOOTH @tonyrog
Interesting that you are both from the post office. There are also a lot of ex-military on this site. I wonder if it more than a coincidence. I think there tends to be a larger percentage of black people in government jobs and the military and so a greater chance of blacks and whites of opposite genders coming into contact with each other.
@CAPT SMOOTH @tonyrog
Interesting that you are both from the post office. There are also a lot of ex-military on this site. I wonder if it is more than a coincidence. I think there tends to be a larger percentage of black people in government jobs and the military, so maybe there is a greater chance of blacks and whites of opposite genders coming into contact with each other. Proximity is an important factor in attraction. Even if a person doesn’t form a relationship at work, a romantic attraction to a person of another race could carry on and affect a persons attractions later. I don’t know, just musing.
@Brice Cameron @CAPT SMOOTH When I came into the PO in 1955 Civil Service jobs were the only jobs available for AA men who served in Korea. I was the only WM in the group of 22.
@tonyrog @Brice Cameron @CAPT SMOOTH
Lmao I laugh over tonyrog liking everything but never commenting, too! I’m so glad he finally commented. For some reason, I thought the mysterious tonyrog was a female all this time lol.
@tonyrog @Brice Cameron @CAPT SMOOTH
I’m glad you decided to post though, @tonyrog . Welcome! Feel free to tell us more about yourself or your experiences, if you’d like…
@MySmile @Brice Cameron @CAPT SMOOTH Thanks.
@tonyrog @Brice Cameron @CAPT SMOOTH Glad you finally joined us Tony. Don’t know how long you will stay out of lurk mode but welcome. I believe that you have read every post from the beginning of this blog.
@tonyrog @Alene @EarthJeff
LOL. AWESOME. Well, welcome! Glad I got you out and speaking 😉
@Brice Cameron@CAPT SMOOTH@tonyrog I did some research on this for my dissertation. Research conducted by
Heaton and Jacobson (2000) indicated that specific organizational contexts, termed “opportunity structures,” composed significant reasons for the increased number of interracial marriages (p. 31). These opportunity structures included those presented to individuals because these individuals served in the military, enrolled in colleges or universities, resided in large metropolitan areas, or lived in locations with histories that reflected earlier acceptance of interracial marriage. Organizational environments (including the post office) compose an “opportunity structure.”
@BeautyIAM @Alene @EarthJeff You got tonyrog to come out of lurk mode!!! Yay!!!
@Alene @EarthJeff
Since this is the internet, I wont take your username as proof of your gender Especially since I’m praying to all that is holy, that you are in fact a man. It would kill me to believe a woman would deliberately bypass all the other postings on the blog, only to stay here, hoping to find holes in every written word…. That is sad. Unlike other blogs on the net, this one was made with YOU in mind (providing you’re a female…. this is the internet after all), not Black men , but YOU. Yet, you want to come here fist waving, screaming black power, but only if it benefits the brothas. Ma’am, Sir, please take several seats across the street and around the corner.
@Alene Dont attack him, and you know your wrong. Attack all the other black rappers that use that word and have you pay them. He did not firstly say ” Im saying your a N” he was saying that he doesn’t understand why black men get away with it, while he goes to prison for it.
Black rappers need serious black women to actually take them to court for saying stuff like that.
@LuizaMabaso “Black rappers need serious black women to actually take them to court for saying stuff like that.”
The late C. Delores Tucker did and in return had vitriol hurled at her from rappers and their “fans” (ie other black people).
@The Working Home Keeper Oh American women you make me proud to say im black. really its you..you took him to court ..
@LuizaMabaso @The Working Home Keeper What country are you from? Just curious.
CNS – ‘I’m at the bus stop and this sort of decent looking, none threatening young Black male asks me for $2; not for bus fare but to buy him a beer. He had no idea how pathetic he was. A few years ago I would have been totally offended and angry by him, but at this point I felt nothing. I was completing indifferent to this Black male and it felt good.’
VintageNarcissa – ‘This reminds me of when me and/or my friends pass random black men on the street while eating or drinking something, and they will ask if they can have some. It used to upset me as well. But now I just laugh and say, oh no my brotha, you gots to get your own!’
That black man couldn’t even be bothered to come up with a fake reason to ask for money. And black men asking strangers for food – I’m sure these types of dbr black men never ask white people for money or food as they’re walking down the street. Is there anything dbr black men are not ashamed of doing to their own people?
@kia “And black men asking strangers for food – I’m sure these types of dbr black men never ask white people for money or food as they’re walking down the street.”
Indeed!
@The Working Home Keeper @kia I’m sure these types of dbr black men never ask white people for money or food as they’re walking down the street.”
I think my world might differ from yours.
I work downtown, and black men ask for food or money nearly everyday.
Surprisingly, a rather bohemian segment of young white men (and white women) are asking for food and money as well.
I suspect I will go to hell, but seeing white pan handlers always make me think of Chris Rock’s line about him seeing a white person beg for money — “Ain’t no reason for that!”
On this one, I have to give Kudos to the Asians. Though i work near Chinatown, they never ask for money.
@Oaktown Paul @The Working Home Keeper @kia “Surprisingly, a rather bohemian segment of young white men (and white women) are asking for food and money as well.”
I see this quite a bit in Dallas, and even in Lafayette, LA. One such couple came into the Starbucks just yesterday. Interesting to say the least.
@kia I have a story to add to the mix. I was pumping gas one day and this young able bodied black man ( early 20’s I would guess) approached me and asked me for some money I told him “no”. Then he says, “Well can you ask your husband?” The man in the car was my brother who I was giving a ride to work that day. I looked at him in disbelief. They have NO SHAME!!
I feel like I need to say this…
Change comes when a collective of a people start doing something about their situation. We know it well from our past, lets this again.
The black rapper
With out you , there is no him..why is is that he cant use black women in his music vidoe’s yet you pay for his music, when he woud rather pay a biracial women, Hispanic women, before he pays the women that makes him. STOP PAYING!
The black media house
Is made by you, there are blogs on the internet that go and target black women, and someone them bring in millions a year. I’m not naming, but a few of you know who they are. They have millions of stats per month and a lot of them are black women.
I title that said and I quote ‘’……becky banger’’ yet they couldn’t say anything nice about the black women, that they used to get there stats.
They hurt one actress who actually wanted too sue them because they were so mean to her and wrote serious garbage about her. Yet they don’t mind saying they say about white women to praise them ( Please I actually like white women some of them are sweet, thats why I cant hate them).
They are a media house built by blacks for blacks, once the blacks kept supporting they started to trash black women mainly. OK
The singers, the sport stars, the actors cant stand up for black women, yet in many cases they were married to black women when they were broke, down and out. They may be married to white women now, because there rich now, but they should be the ones saying you know what I think black women are awesome, they don’t.
The fashion houses
Fashion houses don’t feature black models, as much, because there owned by whites, yet blacks also support them. The one time they do change this is because of white people that think, diviersty is great.
If they don’t support you black women, don’t support them. Its time to change how we see things.
And the black man
You see as a people, we used to be disenfranchised , the black man is the one that is meant to say ‘’My women’s beautiful’’ and the world, is the one dragging us through the mud, and saying all sorts of garbage about us. It time for change
ITS TIME TO SAY I DON’T SUPPORT BLACK MEN, I don’t buy their music, I don’t buy their movies, I don’t listen to radio talk show hosts that are black men.
I do however support myself, I buy black women’s fashion lines, black women’s cosmetics, black women business are where I shop. Its starts with us
@LuizaMabaso The truth is the light and will always shine the way.
@LuizaMabaso And to dovetail nicely to what you are saying……..
http://tinyurl.com/d7xczvm
Create your own ladies.
http://tinyurl.com/bqcbafz
Create your own.
@Brenda55 Give me a black women magazine… I will buy!!..there hair blogs, there Facebook pages i have subscribed to as many as I can find. But I need to see you grow..i want to see you print, so print and sell ill buy..your hair products, your clothes tell me you are their, ill also be there.
@LuizaMabaso
If there is any black actor or artist that disses black women I refuse to go to their movies or buy their music. I won’t even sit & listen to an interview of theirs. Many of these black celebs aren’t as popular now. I think many black women are seeing the light that they shouldn’t support these fools because you look like the bigger fool supporting someone who can’t stand you!
The sad thing is that the women who are shaking their pom poms for these black men and trying to convince you to wait for your black man, are 99% of the time sitting home lonely with no man or maybe have a piece of man they sharing with somebody else. No real prospects and still refuse to look outside for another man who will treat you like a queen, provide, protect, love, and care for you no you won’t do that because only because he’s not a black male. Please.
Dating in the BC:
A piece of man is better than no man.
God will send you a man, no effort required on your part.
All men cheat, so stop B*tching, about him cheating on you with anything with a hole…. he coming home to you, right?
So what you have a degree, whats wrong with dating a man trying to better himself at 40, while waiting to be discovered.
Girl, he a “good man”, he got a job, a car that him and his boy share, and only 4 kids by 4 different moms… Sheniqua’s man got 8 and SHE paying child support for him…you betta bag that man.
We can’t date out, we are the back bone of the community, black men act like they don’t want us, but we know they do, they’ll come back… just wait o_O
A white man? Asian man? girl please, they can’t put it down like the brothas. He may be unemployed and married to that stupid broad, but he turns it up in the bedroom…. I ain’t leaving him for no man.
Girl, I need to get my hair done, Dayquan don’t be messing with me when my hair natural… he said I look like Aunt Jemima…. If it don’t look like Kim or Bey he ain’t touching it.
What do you mean you dating/married to a white man? Are you forgetting what we been through, what they did to us? You a sellout, yo! Our ancestors are rolling in their graves. You always did think you were better than us.
@Lexi88 well here is my answer to the BC…..http://imgur.com/2QIwosr
@Lexi88 This sounds like every conversation that I have ever had with the nursing assistants that I supervised. You heard stuff just like that around the nurses desk all the time.
@Brenda55
I believe you… the struggle is real!
@Brenda55
I believe you… The struggle is real! You can’t make this kind of stuff up.
@Lexi88 Has someone made a Bingo card yet? These responses are so tired.
@Lexi88 This is so SAD and true! I heard/ HEAR several of these comments from S0- Called enlightened women 🙁
@Lexi88 Guuuuuurrrlll, I have heard TI-YERD lines more than 30 years ago and Black women still talkin’ like this?
Oh, you forgot Pookie, Skillet, Junebug, T-Bone, and ’em, mwahahahahaha!
@Lexi88 ****these TI-YERD….*******
This blog needs a social media site, I’m on Facebook while Im on here you guys have to think about that
If you go to codecanyon you find scripts, that allow you to build a social media site ( I dont know how busy you are) but theres a lot of potential. I was thinking about doing that for mine, but can you imagine a ”black womens facebook”
@LuizaMabaso Chris is on FaceBook.
I call my girl cracker all the time… Ok I don’t, I made that up… She is a black woman and well, that term would just not make sense.
Only children make fun of the characteristics that people can’t change about themselves. This man who torments you is simply an intellectual and emotional child.
On a side bar note, my finance and I have been looking at places to get married this October…
What does the audience think about this place? ( I know, off topic, but I just trying to lighten the mood of the thread)
http://www.historichotels.org/hotels-resorts/west-baden-springs-hotel/
My black women deserve the very best!
@ironcowboy Stop worrying about black men, there soon to be history…
@LuizaMabaso
Actually you are correct on more than one level.
The African American race in the United States is becoming more insignificant every single year. The AA race is being displaced by a Hispanic flood… I’m always amused by AA’s that are happy to hear that white people will no longer be the majority in our country by 2060. But they really don’t understand that there is black and there is brown. The country will be brown, not black by 2060… and that 2060 shade of brown is going to be much closer to white than it is to black.
Many AA’s fail to truly understand that Hispanics are not similar to AA’s in most respects. Hispanics are typically high family oriented, and have fathers in the home, this is a much closer to white family structure then it is to blacks. Comparatively Hispanics have few abortions compared to AA’s, which is closer to the white trends. Hispanics tend to vote Republican after the 3rd generation, very unlike AA’s, and more in line with white America. White Americans will live in a brown America much more easily then AA’s can live in a brown America.
Actually the 2060 brown America is going to be a cultural AA nightmare! AA will effectively be a super minority. Between now and 2060 AA’s are going to do one of three basic things: abort 33% more of their numbers, murder each other and be in prison, or marry out and dilute.
@ironcowboy
2060 is 48 years from now. 48 years ago was 1964. Things have changed a lot since then, and they will continue to change. Barring a major catastrophe, I think things will continue to get better as they have been getting better for everyone for the past 100 years. No one can predict the future, but I think the biggest change will be the number of people who claim multiple races. Maybe in the future, race won’t matter so much. We can hope. My child is brown, so I really care more about her future than I do about where white people will stand.
@ironcowboy
The biggest problems in the future are likely to be due to overpopulation and the resulting strain on the environment and our limited resources. The color of the people in the future is trivial.
@ironcowboy
Whoops, I still think it’s 2012
@ironcowboy @LuizaMabaso I can’t “like” this statement because it’s so sad…but it’s the truth I believe.
@ironcowboy @LuizaMabaso “Between now and 2060 AA’s are going to do one of three basic things: abort 33% more of their numbers, murder each other and be in prison, or marry out and dilute. ” Case in point: another senseless shooting less than a couple of miles from my mother’s home– http://www.philly.com/philly/video/199394611.html
@ironcowboy @LuizaMabaso “Between now and 2060 AA’s are going to do one of three basic things: abort 33% more of their numbers, murder each other and be in prison, or marry out and dilute. ” Case in point– http://www.philly.com/philly/video/199394611.html
@Brice Cameron Zeitgeist 2060!!! :oD
@ironcowboy @LuizaMabaso Another, sadder, case in point – http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?section=news/national_world&id=9035676
@ncatina @ironcowboy @LuizaMabaso Yeah,, ncatina, I heard this on the news yesterday. You know what really gets me? Not only is this boy a baby killer, he did this in WRONG state, GEORGIA.
Though 17, in Georgia, he will be tried as an adult, back in the day he’d get “the chair”, in today’s world, most likely, he will be eligible for “the needle”. His life hadn’t even begun, sad.
@ironcowboy
Congratulations!
@ironcowboy Congrats on the upcoming nuptials! 🙂
@ironcowboy
Congrats!!
@ironcowboy That place is fabulous. You must love the hell out of her.
@Brenda55 Yes I do…
@ironcowboy Wow. Your soon-to-be wife is a lucky woman!
@onmywayup I would say that I am a lucky man…
SAD. Dont call them MEN. Anyone who would stoop so low doesnt deserve such a title.
Little kids projecting their own INSECURITIES. PATHETIC!!