The Media Message: Lupita Nyong’o Is Another Man’s Treasure

Check out these recent story lines with stunning actress, Lupita Nyong’o, and then look at who’s loving on her.

From The Daily Mail

article-2542482-1AD1708000000578-884_634x561

She’s been the toast of the awards season so far, picking up prize after prize for her role in 12 Years A Slave.

And on Sunday night, Lupita Nyong’o got yet another seal of approval as Hollywood heavyweight Leonardo DiCaprio stopped to give the Kenyan actress a kiss on the red carpet at the Producers’ Guild Awards.

As Lupita was posing for pictures, The Wolf Of Wall Street star Leonardo strolled past her – and couldn’t resist stopping to heap praise on the stunning star.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2542482/Lupita-Nyongo-gets-kiss-Leonardo-DiCaprio-Producers-Guild-Awards.html#ixzz2r2RSTN19
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And earlier…

Even Bossip noticed…

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So we have two questions for you Are They A Thing? And if not, will they wait until after the Oscars to consummate this connection?

I’m gonna say what everyone is thinking. IT FEELS DAMN GOOD TO SEE A DARK SKINNED SISTER GET SHOWERED WITH SO MUCH LOVE (especially by Leo DeCaprio, and Lupita, I’m really hating you right now because Leo is MY second husband).  Think about how colorism runs rampant in the black community and then think about that old saying, “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.”

Even commenters at that rag Bossip noticed.

Screen Shot 2014-01-21 at 5.28.36 AM

 

What’s your take?

The Man Myth
296 comments
18andlegal
18andlegal

I am glad to see Lupita's presence in the media. Now I am convinced that I could make it in life

Joyce345
Joyce345

I am very happy for Lupita. It is good to see a black woman with her complexion be celebrated like this. I love it.

Lili2009
Lili2009

Just saw on an entertainment show that Jared Leto and Lupita Nyong'o are officially dating (they were spotted canoodling and smooching at a restaurant.) He didn't waste any time! 

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

There was a discussion about her on the TMZ television show.  There was controversy regarding her covers being lightened and darkened on Vanity Fair and Dazed.  I like both covers so it makes no difference to me.  All of the men agreed that she was very beautiful.


Forget the covers, I actually think that she was the most beautiful in the movie natural.  I like that her hair was burnt brown because of working out in the sun.  I loved her natural no makeup beauty in the movie.

introvertedwanderer
introvertedwanderer

Did anyone see Lupita on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon? I don't watch the show, but I saw the clip of her appearance, and Jimmy seemed kind of nervous around her.  It was a nice interview, and Lupita was cool, but Jimmy seemed in awe of her.  It was cute.

Chicago404
Chicago404

Shes  literally perfect in every single way and Im SO happy to see the world celebrate her talent and her beauty like they do for basic white girls.I wish the Lupita love fest would  NEVER end. But After award season I dont know if she'll be on the radar as much because Hollywood doesnt know what to do with her.


And Yes,white men are crazy for her,black men just dont know gold when they see it.Too bad for them. She's probably had more of the top white directors,producers and writers in Hollywood ask her for her hand in marriage in the past 3 weeks than humanely possible lol while black dudes just sitting there like fools.


Black men STAY losing. They'll pass her up and someone amazing will scoop her up while they chasing after yellowbone/white industry groupies.I can only see another African man swooping her up.(even tho theyre are rumors that shes lesbian,Id legit faint if she was.We need a powerful Black Lesbian woman in the industry ala Ellen) 



If I was a rich black man in the industry Id drop kick a bitch just to crawl on bloody stumps,just to BEG Lupita to date me.


"PLZ LUPITA,PLZZZ,PICK ME BABY!PICK ME! 



DeepWater
DeepWater

Oh, I also wanted to say, what a B.E.A.U.T.I.F.U.L, G.O.R.G.E.O.U.S, young woman.


Nice to see another deep toned Black woman reflected back to me as dark-hued Black woman myself.


LOVE IT!

DeepWater
DeepWater

All I have to say is The Red Gown, The Red Gown, The Red Gown.

Check this woman out......

http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/brown-beautiful-killing-lupita-nyongo/


That dress is  MEEEEEAAAAAANNNNN, BABY!


The woman is KILLIN' me over here, she's  KILLIN' me, maaaaaaan!


Oh, and did I mention,The Red Gown?


This woman is CLEEEEEEEAAAAAAANNN as a bill of health.


That Red Gown is SCRUMPDILICIOUSLY BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!  Ya heard me?


That Red Gown..........IS SUPA, DUPA, UBA, TOUGH!


Hope you win the Academy Award for your role in 12 Years, Lupita, cause mama, YOU'RE KILLIN' me over here with that gown.


The Red, The Red Gown, The Red Gown.


AbbyAllen
AbbyAllen

Anyone as stunning as she is defies all bullshit colorism, preferences etc. Her face is perfectly symmetrical, her skin flawless, her body hot, she's universally gorgeous. It's just refreshing to see that someone with dark skin is getting celebrated as such. Usually they don't get the chance to be seen. 

Lady A
Lady A

Actually I've seen white people in general saying how gorgeous they think she is. Both men and women. But yes watch YouTube videos the white men married to black women have chocolate wives and most of the time with natural hair.


It's not about just thinking darker skin is exotic but I just think that our community has been so white washed when it comes to female beauty and have internalized ignorance about darker skin they can't see the beauty and positive in dark skin.


White people have never had their beauty diminished so it's easier for them to appreciate everything including their own.

IndigoStar777
IndigoStar777

She is gorgeous! I really don't see how beauty applies to only certain skin tones. Beauty in all colors and this is great! Especially for all the brain washed folks. Hopefully this will release the wall in people's mind of what beauty is :)

luvizdanswer
luvizdanswer

I agree. However, whether I wear weaves that are similar to my hair texture or not does not influence how naturally black I am. I love changing my hair colour and texture of my hair. I prefer not to do this with hair dyes and relaxers. This is my preference and is not an absolute for black women.

Lupita is amazing actress and yes very beautiful. And if she decided to rock a weave, she would still be beautiful and talented. Cheers

DU2
DU2

In regards to the comment about Lupita  being "not that special" because some of us see women like that all the time, there is a fine line between opinion and fact and something that is a common  occurence to one person may not be  so to another and we have to  watch such statements. Because we have an abundance of something does not mean it loses it's value and appeal to someone who does not.


My mother was born in the United States so she had the luxury of indoor plumbing, flushing toilets and all. My father grew up in the bush in Central America so those things were not available to them. For my mom to say to my father. "having a toilet and a sink with a faucet is is no big deal, I have that stuff all around me all the time" would be a rebuff to someone who grew up without such conveniences and finds joy and excitement in having use of those things for the first time..

I had an east indian friend who  thought it was "No big deal" that Vanessa Williams won the Miss America crown in 1984. Her argument was that Vanessa was no more beautiful than the other 49 women vying for the crown and why was everyone making such a big deal about her winning.  Well maybe because  she was the first black woman to win the crown in the pageants  at that time 54 year history. it was not a big deal to my racially ignorant friend but to 13 year old  black girls like me, it was.


It is a wonderful thing to see this young woman getting  love, it is not just her frame, her dark skin, or her ivy league education . She radiates a genuineness  that attracts people to her. She seems like a very approachable person. that one could  have a pleasant conversation with. I hope Hollywood does not destroy that.


We all have the right to out opinion, but it does not make it truth. We all have things that are  and are not a big deal to us but to someone else it may be the opposite.

AminahMatthews
AminahMatthews

Uh, if I'm not mistaken.... I think Leo  helps or adopted 1 or 2 African children in Africa. Not sure though..... This happen while on location filming Blood Diamond years ago in Mozambique and South Africa. He took a serious liking to some of the African children there.

Shaylah
Shaylah

I like how she is very intelligent and she will definitely pick roles that will bring out the best in black women. I have seen pictures of Leo with a black woman. Brad Pitt dated robin Givens. Brad Pitt has a African daughter so he going to make sure that there are positive role models for her. The more they see positive role models then any time a negative comment is made about a black women, it will get shot down with a quickness.  the saying nature abhors a vacuum and the more positive images of black women that are being shown, the more normal it will become.

realblueblood
realblueblood

Now, here's one post that I did not see the "controversy" coming from!  Geesh!


I think those of us who see this young lady as awesome( and I am taking a chance for speaking for some of you...forgive me) is because its what we think she appears to represent.  It's not really because Hollywood is swooning over her( you know they are fickle and she could be in today and out tomorrow) but its because her beauty is being ACKNOWLEDGED on a large scale.  She is not invisible to the "masses" if you will.  She's not even invisible to the black media community, because we all know dark women are not highly visible on  BET, Vibe and you fill in the rest.


I don't think this site is trying to make everyone sing Lupita's praises, I believe this site just wanted to highlight an "exception" to the visuals our society is inundated with and deemed as "beautiful", on a daily basis.


I say "bravo" to the "Exception." 

bellechose
bellechose

so here's the score:


1st the light-skinned brigade came out to denounce this post.


Now we have a select few saying there is nothing special about Lupita, stop celebrating her.

i can't WAIT to hear what else people can drudge up....as you were.

jazzyfae45
jazzyfae45

Congrats to the lovely Lupita Nyong'o on all her success. I hope she continues to keep having the success she's having now in the future.

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

To those who say that she is nothing special that she is just another black girl, you sound just like DBR black men who will say that she is nothing special.  Of course YOU wouldn't see it.

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

Lupita IS amazing..  The only reason that this turned into a light/dark conversation is because one person took that one line in that bossip conversation and started going on about light skinned women getting thrown under the bus to compliment dark women.  She could have easily taken that conversation over to Bossip and had a conversation with the actual perpetrator over there.   Instead, she attempted the dialogue over here to make it seem like she was being picked on.  So a few people over here fell for the manipulation started to coddle her and the conversation got derailed. 


tracyreneejones
tracyreneejones

I purposely stayed out of this conversation because I'm not pressed for the light skinned versus dark skin conversation AND I am very confused about why everyone finds this girl so amazing. 


Not that she's NOT amazing, but she's just another black girl to me. I am aware of women who look like her. I know Ivy League is great but they do LET black people into the school doors these days AND her look is not so unique to me. 


She favors my foster mother in her younger days (saw pictures) so the Black women need to do less fawning and more transforming to be like Lupita. 


All you gotta do is see yourself in her and then you take the wheel and drive. 





Joyce345
Joyce345

May I add that although I am happy for her, I do hope that she will transition into other, more mainstream roles. i.e. not a slave or a maid lol!

Kimduo37
Kimduo37

You should read her Facebook page. You have some BM saying. "BM need to step it up before she strays" (Rolleyes)

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@Chicago404 


Why are you presuming she ever would give BM in Hollywood a chance? Honest question. Maybe she seeks someone from her culture or a non BM. Your words give BM more power than they deserve. Not all BW - particularly foreign ones - are checking for BM in the states.

Robert52
Robert52

@Savannah1812 Good article, both women are beautiful.  My wife is a fan of "OLTL," and I would watch it with her, I remember Tika's role as Layla and wow, was she hot!

Freespirit888
Freespirit888

@realblueblood I cosign uplifting Lupita. She's incredibly gorgeous.   She reminds me of a more fem Grace Jones who I idolized. 


Freespirit888
Freespirit888

@bellechose  "1st the light-skinned brigade came out to denounce this post."


Really?  That's not what I saw.


introvertedwanderer
introvertedwanderer

@bellechose


" 1st the light-skinned brigade came out to denounce this post."

This is clearly an exaggeration.  In fact, from my posts, and a couple of others that I think are light/lighter skinned on here, we were saying that it's great that Lupita is getting attention, and that she is definitely beautiful. Most posts have been about praising Lupita, and keeping the focus on her, and rooting for her success.  If anyone was trying to denounce this entry, then that kind of praise would not have been given.

"Now we have a select few saying there is nothing special about Lupita, stop celebrating her."

People have their opinions.  I've seen on a few other sites, a few people who also think that the praise of Lupita is a bit too much.  I don't personally agree with that opinion, but I don't think they are wrong for having that opinion, either. The thing is that most people seem to be praising Lupita, so contrasting opinions seem to be the minority not the majority, anyway.

bellechose
bellechose

@Savannah1812 

If celebrating one woman only a few times (read 2 posts) means we reject other women, I think that says more about the psyche of the offended party....

introvertedwanderer
introvertedwanderer

@Savannah1812

Well, often times one group of people does get thrown under the bus in order to uplift another person or group.  That's just the way people tend to operate.  However, when I made my initial comment, I wasn't trying to start some long conversation about light skinned women being picked on, and by no means was i trying to manipulate anyone into coddling me. But I will give you credit for making some very interesting assumptions, though.  My main objective was just to get it out there that one group of people does not have to be disrespected and called all kinds of names in order to give credit, props, kudos, and respect to another person or group. And that goes for more than just light/dark skinned conversations, that's just for issues in general.  Now, if you have an issue with me doing that, then that's on you. and no one else had to answer my initial comment, but some chose to do that.  Brenda said that she agreed with me, and that was fine. That could have been the end of the conversation.  You then made  a comment, and I responded, by basically letting you know that I agreed with you, and that white men's preferences just seem to be an individual thing based on what I have seen with my own eyes and my experiences so far in my own life.  That's it.    If I wanted to make a comment over on the Bossip site, I could have, absolutely, but that's one site I barely ever visit because I don't care for it.  The only reason I even knew about the comments on there was because the article was referenced for this entry, and I wanted to see it over on the other site, so I clicked on it, and immediately saw comments I did not like.  I chose to mention it on here, because the article was referenced on here.


Now, if you want to think that I was trying to manipulate people and trying to veer the whole conversation to another topic, then that's on you.  I will not allow you to put motives on to me that I did not intend.  Keep trying to do that, and I will respond to you, because I don't appreciate it. Thanks.

Chicago404
Chicago404

@tracyreneejones Im sorry baby but dont play dumb,. We NEVER get a dark skin woman in the media that s seen as beautiful adn is celebrated for her work.Period.We're STARVED for this type of shit. We NEEEEEED her.We NEEED this! And Im not even dark skin and I NEED this!


She beautiful

HIGHLY educated

Sweet

Talented,

Funny

Nice


I mean shes basically your all american girl AND dark skin with a fade. ITs lovely to see someone like her being celebrated just for exhisting in the white supremacist media that tells everyone that white is right and everyone else can go sit their little black brown and yellow asses down.


We just like her,and think shes pretty.And since when do black women get that Meagan Foxx treatment? Halle Berry was the last black woman to get that treatment. And thats great!


And most importantly representation matters. Im sure it'll be nice for younf dark skin girls to see someone  that looks like them on the tv and see how everyone is losing their minds for her and going "WOW,THATS ME!" 

travelgal456
travelgal456

@tracyreneejones  

People find her amazing because she is amazing. Just because you are aware of women that looks just like her does not make her “just another black girl”. The fact is most American girls do not have a Master's degree from an Ivy league school (most do not even have a Bachelor's degree), spoke multiple languages(4 to be exact), get nominated for the highest honor in their field(especially for their first major debut), speak with such eloquence as Lupita does or carry herself the way Lupita does.   


The most amazing thing for me is that she is receiving so much love from the media. When was the last time a really dark-skinned black woman with short natural hair received so much positive attention from the media? I remember Tika Sumpter saying black girls were writing her to say “Thank you” when she on Gossip Girl because they were glad to see someone with her skin color on TV.


I am an African immigrant (Nigerian-American) and we are considered an “Invisible Model Minority” so yes I am surrounded by Nigerian-American girls that look like Lupita and have graduate/professional degrees from Ivy schools. However we are called an invisible model minority because you never see that in the media. So it just fills me with joy that she is receiving so much praise for her look and intelligence.


I hope she wins the Oscars because I cannot wait to hear the amazing speech she gives. 

dani-BBW
dani-BBW

@tracyreneejones I think it's her stature. When you see her in person like via video, she's just stunning. Something about how she carries herself, coupled with her cuteness, is supremely regal yet accessible. Just seems unique. Similar to how Zooey Deschanel reinvented herself a few years ago as a cool, unique, comfortable in her own skin kind of girl, that seemed to increase her likability (and looks). Lupita has a very different vibe but something about her just radiates. I can't imagine her role of Patsy in 12 Years being played by a different actress.

Kimber2013
Kimber2013

@Joyce345 From my understanding, this was Lupita's first major role after recently graduating from Yale. The truth of the matter is, she won an oscar for her very first performance in a motion picture. She hasn't had any other roles. The mere fact that she has achieved such success in a short period, really speaks volumes. 


Although I would like to see black women receive awards for portraying non slave characters, I will admit that Lupita's acting in 12 years a slave was truly impeccable. I really felt the torment and hurt that Patsy felt, because she brought such a level of realness to the character. The other person who has been able to touch my soul w/ such  strong acting, was Oprah, in the color purple. 


Lupita is not only intelligent and talented, she has the fortune to also be beautiful with impeccable skin. Thank Goodness a real black woman with grace and intelligence is finally in the spot light. I hope that her star continues to shine brightly!

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@Kimduo37 


How presumptuous and entitled are BM to assume Lupita narrows her choices solely to them. That really annoys me, for reasons Toni mentioned in her recent article on educated BW.

Chicago404
Chicago404

I'm very confused. Where did I say she was interested in them? I highly doubt she's be interested. And I even said that I can ony see a non black man or ago can man being into her and visa versa. Where am I giving black men power when I literally said "black men STAY losing"? It's pretty obvious that I've denounced them to their core and their failure to "not see gold when it's in front of them"? Hmm you're a bit off but it's all good. I just assumed she was above them and they're too stupid to realize how amazing she is when all the non blak men in the industry see her as gold

TeeVee
TeeVee

There are many black American with advanced degrees!!! Maybe you don't know any personally, but they do exist! You need to read more of this blog.

tracyreneejones
tracyreneejones

@travelgal456 


I'm sorry, she's 'just another black girl to me' still stands. 


I do understand the lack of representation of 'this' black woman in the media but the media isn't real life or a priority or where I based my value systems. 


I understand that others do, and that's unfortunate. 

The lack of representation still doesn't negate that I know OF WOMEN LIKE HER in real life, as you state, that you know of many as beautiful and as intelligent, and aspiring as Lupita. And that's a great thing, because now I know I'm not imaging things. 


MY POINT... is that Lupita is not a unicorn BECAUSE there are other women like her in the real world (including the hood/the projects/and a town near you!). 


I think some people need to hear that. 


I think some people need to know that 'AMAZING PPL" are just people who may be more like 'you' then you realize. 


Not that she (individually) doesn't deserve praise, but part of what needs to be done with black women (and women in general) is to stop buying into 'specialness' and instead purchase a ticket to recognizing themselves as the prime example of perfection while obtaining educational goals, career goals, and personal life goals. 


Lupita is awesome, and she is one of many 'regular' real life awesome black women. 


As I said, dark black women with cropped hair who speak eloquently aren't a strange occurance in my world and I bet if some of the readers looked in the mirror they might realize they know such a girl themselves. 



I hope she wins every last award known to mankind forever and ever, amen. 

bellechose
bellechose

@travelgal456@tracyreneejones  

IA. there are many black women in the US and abroad with several degrees, travel frequently, slim and healthy, and do not have many hangups about their skin color, its just they aren't shown in white OR black media.

I would caution people wishing Hollywood would continue showing women like Lupita. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. black women like Lupita are a threat plain and simple :D Slime, fit, sexy, intelligent, poised, graceful, gracious, funny, etc. I'm already reading comments on other sites from bitter/jealous blacks that are already resenting her because of how well she speaks. they think it makes her sound "fake" and not authentic 0_o

The point is for like-minded black women and even African media to use their own platforms and promote and celebrate her.  No one else can celebrate black women like other black women.

I repeat HOLLYWOOD and white media in general will never celebrate her the way like-minded black women with various platforms can.  Some of us are expecting WAY TOO much from them.  Yes it took white mainstream media for some blacks to recognize her beauty, but if that means jeopardizing white plain janes pedestal (i.e. a Jennifer lawrence) you will soon see that support DISAPPEAR.

I'd like to see more black women creating their own tables and seating themselves rather than begging to at LEAST stand at a table that really doesn't appreciate you or want you around :)

Chicago404
Chicago404

@Veronique Valesquez @Chicago404 


Sweetheart you seriously need to go read your comments.You replied to MY comment,asked me questions,projected  things into that no one else in this post read into them,then once I told you off,assigned nasty traits to me when you didnt have a leg to stand on.Not cute. 

Icing on the cake? You made a fool of yourself then played the victum


"DOnt post me again on this thread" 


1,I'll post to whoever I want to,free country.2 you replied to ME first,asked me a series of assinine questions unrelated to my comment that I was kind enough to nicely answer,then insulted me,my persona and my love life for you failing at reading comprehension. 

3.Thats foul as hell. Now dont YOU post to me on this thread ever again because Ive never dealt with nonsense like this before here,and I dont plan on it ever again.You have yourself a nice night.

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@Chicago404 


There you go presuming again. As a person with no cultural ties to BM in the U.S., I am not protecting them.


My point was that BW should think about how we place BM in context to our lives. Reread my post above for clarification on this, "kid." 


Don't post to me again on this thread.

Chicago404
Chicago404

Lmfao wow you're seriously projecting and on some other ish RN. I'm not even sure you know whT you're talking about and here's why. I made fun of black men in the industry and you've somehow turned this into the "you're a bitter black spiteful woman who's been hurt by a black man" debacle. Girl it ain't even that serious.

I'm slightly offended because not only did you miss the point of the post "Lupita is another mans treasure" as the point of this article is to highlight that "BLACK MEN DONT VALUE BLACK WOMEN LIKE LUPITA " and me poking fun at how true it is,you somehow misread,misinterpreted my entire comment that was agreeing with the OP of this post and the screencap of the comments on bossip. I'm just rehashing what has already been said.

You seem very protective of black men,which is fine. But to read me pokin fun at the situation as spiteful? That's a bit much. It's not even that serious. I never insinuated that shes dates BM or even should date them. I made fun of the fact that BM in te industry that notoriously chase after WW and yellow bone groupies are going to let a gem like Lupita be snatched up by some rich and powerful white man in the industry. Once again,that's the point of the article.

And no,I'm not spiteful or hurt by blak men,which I'm not so sure how you even read that into my original comment.or how you think I'm competing with men I've never even dated before.

The problem here is you. You didn't understand my fist comment and then somewhere along the line decided that I was insinuating things I never insinuated then compared me to men like Tony Sotomayor. I'm not sure how you turn me poking fun at the situ ion into something nasty,but it's really uncalled for . It's not my fault if you misunderstood my first comment. I told you what I meant but you're still holding on to what you THOUGHT I said instead of what I told you I said.

So after this,you're on your own kid. Funny. I never thought I'd be called a spiteful bitter black woman by another black woman on an IT daiting site. Boy,that's a low blow. I thought we we're suppose to be safe here from nonsense like that.

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@Chicago404  


I understand quite well. Your comments on BM seemed spiteful, presumptuous and as if you're in competition with them. Reading your posts regarding Lupita gives me a sense that you are in pain by BM rejection and that you get pleasure out of Lupita doing well, particularly to rub it in BM's face. 


I speak about BM and I think it's important since there are not many safe spaces to do so, particularly for BW. I comment about BM who impose in my life without my consent. Speaking about BM in the context you have suggests the sinister feeling I get from many BM. It seems like many BM and BW are in competition with one another and that's what I gathered from your posts.


In addition, most black immigrant women, like non BW, aren't really interested in BM. Your posts remind me of the BM who approach my friends and I and we politely decline or ignore them in favor of our BFs/Husbands nearby. Not everyone is checking for these BM, despite their delusions.


It reminds me of the idiom, "the opposite of love isn't hate, but apathy." Just something to consider.


bellechose
bellechose

@Chicago404 

I think the point is, why did you feel the need to bring up what bm are thinking when it comes to bw like Luptia because at the end of the day, MOST of us could care less :D

we all know a HUGE chunk of bm (i'm being very conservative with that estimate) aren't worthy of bw, hence this site.


how about we focus on who IS checking for her and celebrate the other aspects of Lupita that make her fabulous :)

Chicago404
Chicago404

Ok this is going to sound mean but I SWEAR to you I'm not being nasty.

I think you suffer from reading comprehension. I know I know that sounds so mean,but don't get mad. Work with me here a little bit? Because after all look at the title of this post. This is about how the work is celebrating her beauty and how she's "another mans treasure". This entire post is about how Lupita is being treasured by non black men while black men aren't celebrating her like her white male counterparts are.

We already know that very few black men in Hollywood would go crazy for her. In fact I've yet to see any pictures of black men getting their life when in her presence while basically every photo of her is with either white men looking like they're in awe or her being with other black women who adore the hell out if her. That's the point of this entire article and the post on bossip. Black men don't value black women and Lupita will either be treasured by an African man or a non black man because African American and black British men stay losing.

So your questions about my position on black men concerning Lupita are confusing me a little bit. What is it that you're REALLY asking me?

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@Chicago404  


In regards to Lupita, why do you presume BM are losing or reached out to her at all? How do you know that BM have failed to "not see gold when it's in front of them" in reference to Lupita? 


Essentially, why discuss BM in context to Lupita at all? This is an actual question - have you read BM celebs denouncing her?

Chicago404
Chicago404

@Freespirit888 @TeeVee Im 23 and trying to get on your level! lol Im so excited! I dont know what Im going to do but I just keep seeing so many black women with masters and phds.Its becoming the new normal and Im looking forward to being apart of this new wave.

Freespirit888
Freespirit888

@TeeVee I think most of the women commenting on this blog have advanced degrees. Some may even have 2. (Humble brag) LOL.



Chicago404
Chicago404

@TeeVee Thank you!


.,Im literally the ONLY black women that doesnt t have an advanced degree in my circle. Like Im the one everyone goes "Gir...so when you getting your masters..you're 23,stay focused". Like I dont know any black women who arent in college and killin it,I just dont.It seems like everyone that graduated from my high school went straight to college.The boys too. Atlanta is producing some amazing black mena dn women.


and Im so thankful to have the group of friends that I have.They stay on my ass and Im like "oh snap,I gotta go back to school.I need a phd!!!!" lol So women like Lupita are MY normal. 


And 75% of all blacks with PHDs are BLACK WOMEN So. Im not sure what home girl up there is talking about.

TeeVee
TeeVee

@bellechose@TeeVee I responded to what she said about American women not having advanced degrees.  Your response makes no sense.  Good day to you.

TeeVee
TeeVee

@travelgal456@TeeVee   I only responded to what you wrote in your post about American women.  Thanks for clarifying.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@TeeVee  

I never said I do not know black American women with advanced degrees. I do. I said Africans are an invisible model minority because we get undergraduate/graduate/professional degrees at a higher rate than the population average yet the media mainly considers Asians as the only model minority . Please read this link(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Model_minority) to learn more about the invisible model minority issue I am talking about. The “Invisible Model Minority: Africans” section in particular. 

bellechose
bellechose

@TeeVee 

since when did celebrating accomplished degreed bw mean we don't know these same fabulous bw in our own lives??

some of you ladies just love to stir the pot.

the problem is nobody wants what you're cooking...

 

TeeVee
TeeVee

@travelgal. I meant black American women with advanced degrees. Typing on mobile phone!

Chicago404
Chicago404

I'm sorry I think in replying to the wrong person. These things confuse me. I apologize.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@Chicago404

I am not sure what you are talking about either. I never said anything about black women not having graduate  degrees or PHDs.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@Savannah1812 @cns @travelgal456 @tracyreneejones  

I keep reading that I said “black American women don't have graduate degrees”. Please quote where I said that. What I said was “most American girls do not have a Master's degree from an Ivy league school”. That is true. Check out the facts at this link (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Educational_attainment_in_the_United_States). Only 8.05% of USA population have a Master degree thus my comment “most American girls do not have a Master's degree from an Ivy league school (most do not even have a Bachelor's degree)”

cns
cns

@Savannah1812@travelgal456@cns@tracyreneejones

I agree that it's not uncommon for Black women have advanced degrees, but I would hope that people would agree that having an advanced degree is something that should be acknowledge and recognized as special. It saddens me that you don’t see it that way. There are many actresses in that have been acknowledge and celebrated for being Ivy League educated. Have we become so jaded that we cannot even acknowledge this Black woman that has graduate from Yale? Come on now? I’m not sure about your circles but being a Yale graduated is still seen as a pretty big deal in the US and around the world.Natalie Portman, Brooke Shields, Meryl Streep, Jodie Foster… have all being celebrated by the peers and the public for been Ivy League educated so can we give this young lady the same consideration. If not, please don’t down grade her accomplishments among non-black people. They might become bewildered by your lack pride.


cns
cns

@tracyreneejones@travelgal456


I agree the she is not a unicorn in your circle “but just another black girl”, but you have to remember that Chocolate Brown beauties have been told from youth into adulthood that they are not attractive based solely on aesthetics . I not sure if you have had a chance to watch Oprah’s Lifeclass on Colorism. It was interesting indeed. Oprah spoke with Tika Sumpter and she revealed that in her household her parents told her she was beautiful because of her dark skin not in spite of it. But she said that a Black male gave her a back handed complement regarding her dark complextion. Well she gave him an earful. Even if Black girls are taught in the home that they are beautiful other Black people are taught that Black is not beautiful but ugly. Dark brown beauties young and old need to see in the media that hot, hulking, wealthy A-list male actors find Lupita breathtaking and will not care that the world is watching them fawn all over this Dark beauty. Any black girl or women that have been told all their life that they are not attractive needs to observe how Lupita is being treated.

.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@tracyreneejones

I never thought Lupita was a unicorn. You asked “why everyone finds this girl so amazing” so I listed her accomplishments. I think the Nigerian-American girls that surrounds me are amazing. I do not go around asking people to explain to me why they are amazing. I do not try to take away from their accomplishments/throw shade by saying “Not that she's NOT amazing, but she's just another black girl to me”. When I see/hear people praise my highly-accomplished girls I say “Yes, she is my friend and I agree she is effing AMAZING”. Lupita is just getting the praise on a bigger scale and that is effing amazing.


The truth is that most Americans (foreign or native born) will never ever get near the level of success she already has at age 30.For Americans (especially black Americans) getting a Master's degree from an Ivy league, school, speaking multiple languages, getting nominated for the highest honor in their field is the exception not the norm in this country. 

Chicago404
Chicago404

That angers me more than anything. I usually only hang out aroun blacks like myself but when I have the misfortune of being in the presences of non educat slacks I constantly get accused of being "inauthentic".

WorldTravelingChic
WorldTravelingChic

@Veronique Valesquez@bellechose@travelgal456@tracyreneejonesUnfortunately, this type of ignorance and stubbornness is prevalent in other parts of the world as well. I've had run-ins in Europe and Africa where people accused me of faking my American accent or refused to believe I was American - while I was talking to a white American about something going on IN our part of America.


It's hard to break through to folks who can't enlarge their thinking enough to recognize that they (and their way of thinking/speaking/seeing the world) aren't the center of the universe.

Chicago404
Chicago404

@Veronique Valesquez @bellechose @travelgal456 @tracyreneejones 


They live in a bubble as well as having a deep rooted hatred for their selves as well as a firm believer in white supremacyeven tho they dont realize it.


They see themselves in the same eyes as a southern redneck from the 1800's.Stupid,ghetto,inarticulate and ugly.


But we also have a huge "Im black and Im proud" mantra thats beaten into our skulls from day 1.which creates a paradox within the entire african american community.


We hate ourself underneath our black pride and see ourselves just as lowly as everyone else does..


SO therefore your cuz cant be from france and have a french accent. Because "niggas aint french""YOU CANT SOUNG LIKE THAT!" only whiteness can posses that accent and those traits that many blacks in europe have.And possessing said traits provoke envy,resentment and hatred. Which cuases many blacks to "put that uppity,fake black in their place". Because theyve become their own slave master making sure everyone knows "where they belong"


Anyone who displays positive traits they ONLY see as positive white trais,automatically gets deemed "fake" and "inauthentic" or my favorite "trying to be white"


Thats my absolute favorite.Thats how you know this black person is unknowingly practicing white supremacy. When they assign positive traits like eloquence and intelligence and self control,to another race entirely,while implying that th opposite of these positive traits are inf fact black traits. 



Ever notice that the only time someone gets a "hood pass" or an 'honorary black man card" they usually embody negative black streotypes that we've worked so hard to lay to rest.


So of course theyll see lupita an assume that shes inauthentic because she isnt embodying their  warped perception of blackness and the world.


shit,had that person been to france,theyd know that france has the larger populations of black in all of europe. 


But then again Ie met whites and blacks who went to Paris and London and Sweden and Amsterdam and couldnt believe it wasnt a white Utopia,and that GASP blacks do live there,thrive there,and are nothing like Keisha dn Tyron from the hood.And it frightened them. They believed that lie about themselves.

Veronique Valesquez
Veronique Valesquez

@bellechose @travelgal456 @tracyreneejones  


"I'm already reading comments on other sites from bitter/jealous blacks that are already resenting her because of how well she speaks. they think it makes her sound "fake" and not authentic 0_o"


Can someone explain why some AA expect blacks from other countries to sound in a way they can relate? I have a cousin who visited me in the states from France. She met some AA while here who told her to stop lying about her accent - that she's faking it and no blacks sound like that. Why is there a STRONG STUBBORNNESS to believe that others are different although in similar skin?

Patricia Kayden
Patricia Kayden

I agree with you. Where are the Julie Dash movie directors? We need more black women in command of our image.

Robert52
Robert52

@Savannah1812@travelgal456@bellechose I would agree, those shows you mention also project a stereotype and in many cases affirm to white people what they already think about Black women.  I detest those shows and don't watch them.  I don't watch any reality shows anyway.  WM like myself for the most part as I have mentioned in are not hung up on the dark versus light complexion, we love all the colors.  I know that celebrities like Tika that reaffirm that dark skinned women beauty is no different that any other skin tone.  Tika and Lupita are absolutely stunning!

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

@travelgal456@Savannah1812


Tika Sumpter said that she was affirmed at home and she SOUGHT OUT images of beautiful dark women while growing up. Me and my sister were doing that years ago and it worked.


This is why I am not doing backflips because white media is praising Lupita.  I like it but it does not affect me to the point of being happy or sad.  I already knew that she was fabulous regardless of what they say.  Okay.  I am all Lupitaed out.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@Savannah1812

I love Tika Sumpter. I was secretly happy One Life To Live was cancelled because they did my girl bad...LOL

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

@travelgal456@Savannah1812@bellechose


Oh no.  What I am saying is that we know that we are beautiful so why not create our own media?  For example, creating content on the web.  I was referring to images of beauty.  I was stating that we need to be creating images in whatever way we can of black beauty.  I was referring to not being affected by seeing beautiful white women on tv.  I am however, affected by negative portrayals of black women on reality shows. Like RHOL and BBW and those Hip Hop reality shows on VH1.  Hell it is traumatic to see these women (actually physically beautiful women) arguing and fighting on tv. 


So I would rather not see us as symbols of beauty in the mainstream media or at all than to see us portrayed like those dreadful reality show babes.


And I love seeing Lupita as well being celebrated cause she looks more like me.  I am just saying that I started celebrating women that looked like Lupita before 12 years a slave and will continue to after she wins the Oscar.


Tika Sumpter was being interviewed on OWN about how she has such high self esteem as a dark girl.  She said that she was affirmed at home and she SOUGHT OUT images of beautiful dark women.  Me and my sister were doing that years ago and it worked.

travelgal456
travelgal456

@Savannah1812 @bellechose  

I totally agree with not seeking validation from white media. For me it’s not about seeking validation from white media/community.  It is nice to see someone like Lupita on mainstream entertainment media. I rarely see it. I grew up in Nigeria for the first eighteen years of my life so I have a solid self-esteem and positive image of myself. At a very early age I knew I could be anything I want because all the positive role models I saw on TV and around me were black. I grew up on Nollywood. My president was black, vice-president was black, actors/actresses was black, doctor were black, lawyers were black etc. Black was the default race when I was growing up. However a lot of black American kids do not have that experience.


Whether we like it or not, it has have been proven that kids are affected by the images of people that look like them on TV. Black kids are negatively affected by the images portrayed on TV. So while it’s great to encourage black women to create/find other platforms (someone mentioned YouTube, Nollywood, and other foreign film institutions),  kids/ teenagers do not usually watch these platforms. I am pretty sure more black girls/black teenagers watches white media/Hollywood than Nollywood/ foreign film institutions. So it fills my heart with joy that Lupita is getting so much attention/praise on white media/Hollywood. White media rules in this country and until POSITIVE black media (not Tyler Perry) is readily accessible to black girls  I hope we continue to get this once-in-a-while, big-scale praise of dark-skinned girl/woman.

travelgal456
travelgal456

For me it’s not about seeking validation from white media/community.  It is nice to see someone like Lupita on mainstream media. I rarely see it. I grew up in Nigeria for the first eighteen years of my life so I have a solid self-esteem and positive image of myself. At a very early age I knew I could be anything I want because all the positive role models I saw on TV and around me were black. I grew up on Nollywood. My president was black, vice-president was black, actors/actresses was black, doctor were black, lawyers were black etc. Black was the default race when I was growing up. However a lot of black American kids do not have that experience.


Whether we like it or not, it has have been proven that kids are affected by the images of people that look like them on TV. Black kids are negatively affected by the images portrayed on TV. So while it’s great to encourage black women to create/find other platforms (someone mentioned YouTube, Nollywood, and other foreign film institutions),  kids/ teenagers do not usually watch these platforms. I am pretty sure more black girls/black teenagers watches white media/Hollywood than Nollywood/ foreign film institutions. So it fills my heart with joy that Lupita is getting so much attention/praise on white media/Hollywood. White media rules in this country and until POSITIVE black media (not Tyler Perry) is readily accessible to black girls  I hope we continue to get this once-in-a-while, big-scale praise of dark-skinned girl/woman.

KyiaKpatrick
KyiaKpatrick

@bellechose@KyiaKpatrick

Like brenda said we got different things from the comment. Just because I disagree with a few comments doesn't mean I fall for the "Okey Doke"

We all know the plight of BW in the media so I dont need a history lesson or a book reference either.


Like I said, we SHOULD celebrate each other (which is why we are here today) and I totally agree that people should stop seeking validation, but us celebrating Lupita has nothing to do with that. No one here is looking for the scraps off ______'s table. This is a swirling blog for BW, and an article about a BW, with commenters who are BW giving said BW praise and appreciation. Where in this whole conversation is anyone looking for approval or being fooled by the media? 


Furthermore, who said anything about feeling good about ourselves? Maybe you're referring to that light vs dark nonsense going on here earlier but right here, I don't see how that applies.


Foreign film companies do have it right, so I totally agree with that. More BW should be behind the camera, the few that are are create successful products and make change. ( See Shonda Rhimes) So No one is contesting you on that.

As for the Jealous Blacks they need not even be relevant.

To sum things up, I agree with your underlying message. Me posting the Caveat about separatism isn't just about your comments, its something most in the BC forget when they are so busy trying to get their "piece". Look at "Tyler Perry". I respect his story but how many ORs are going to see his movies? Like it or not he, like any other film director or producer is still apart of the "Holly". He's just stuck in his own island.

I'm just saying that there is a way to celebrate ourselves, and have our own, and also make connections to what currently exists so that isolation factor doesn't occur.

Savannah is right too, we absolutely don't need to wait for something we can do ourselves.

When Shonda Rhimes created Grey's anatomy she had something good. When she created Scandal, she made something great. It isnt just about an interracial white house affair, its about seeing the a pretty, powerful BW changing stereotypes one episode at a time. We need more like Shonda, people like her  need their own film companies because they transcend those boundaries. They work WITH the world we live in to send out the messages they know people need to hear.

There is a way do to everything, that's all im saying. BW can definitely have our cake, a piece of "Holly's" cake, and bake another to eat too.






Savannah1812
Savannah1812

@bellechose@travelgal456


I absolutely HATE when SOME black women blame their lack of self esteem on the lack of role models in the media.  It is not the white media's intention to make you feel good about yourself.  I never felt bad about myself because I saw a blond, blue eyed girl looking at me through the tv screen.  SOME of us are waiting for white America for a lot of the things that we can do ourselves and that is why black America will be paralyzed for eternity...

Savannah1812
Savannah1812

@bellechose


HOLLY WAS NEVER INTENDED TO UPLIFT AND CELEBRATE BLACKS AND IT NEVER WILL.

this needs...NEEEEEDS to seep into each and every black woman's mind.

when the bulk of us truly get this, we will stop looking for white establishments to validate us.


Preach!!!! 


bellechose
bellechose

@KyiaKpatrick@bellechose  

HOLLY WAS NEVER INTENDED TO UPLIFT AND CELEBRATE BLACKS AND IT NEVER WILL.

this needs...NEEEEEDS to seep into each and every black woman's mind.

when the bulk of us truly get this, we will stop looking for white establishments to validate us.

the next time you see a flawless black woman like Lupita in main stream media being celebrated, consider it the sprinkles or nuts on an ice cream sundae. It's nice have BUT NOT NECCESSARY to enjoy the sundae.


I encourage black women to STOP seeking validation through white main stream media and a poinsouns black media here in the US.  you will ALWAYS end up disappointed.


Again, it's NICE to see, but NOT NECESSARY to make you feel good about yourself. I encourage you to read SojournersPassort's post national media blackout of all poisonous media. You don't realize how much filth you've internalized until you've purged it from your mind.


"You mention the other jealous blacks as a reason for why Hollywood may not start appreciating women like her more..."

no those are separate issues. bitter, lazy, black folks always snap at blacks doing well and looking good while doing so. i was just making the point that as awesome as Lupita is, there will ALWAYS be black folks, who choose to be mediocre, that hate black women who are successful.


with regards to being fooled by the growing number of black women on television, I think you should also visit http://notyourgirlfriday.wordpress.com/


you will see several HELPFUL posts about bw in the media and how not to fall for the okey dokey :)


There are so many bw in media like YouTube, Nollywood, and other foreign film institutions that I could care less what Hollywood does.  

Hollywood has been on the decline for several years now and black women are HUGE consumers of media.....you do the math.

Brenda55
Brenda55 moderator

@KyiaKpatrick @bellechose  

"Views that tell us we need shrink back and further separate ourselves just because of the opinions of a few people are not only pessimistic but are what keep alot of the BC in its current position."



I do not think that what was being said.  I think that black women should be a power not only in front of the camera but behind it.  These are not mutually exclusive positions. 


Black women should be in the drivers seat in all spheres of life.  That is what I think bellechose was saying. At least that is what I got from it.

Brenda55
Brenda55 moderator

@bellechose @travelgal456 @tracyreneejones  

" I'm already reading comments on other sites from bitter/jealous blacks that are already resenting her because of how well she speaks. they think it makes her sound "fake" and not authentic 0_o"


The AA self-hate crew have geared up I see.  Sigh.



"The point is for like-minded black women and even African media to use their own platforms and promote and celebrate her.  No one else can celebrate black women like other black women."


^^^^^THIS^^^^^




"I'd like to see more black women creating their own tables and seating themselves rather than begging to at LEAST stand at a table that really doesn't appreciate you or want you around :) "


I truly beleive that is starting to happen,,,this site is a part of that in my humble opinion.




KyiaKpatrick
KyiaKpatrick

@bellechoseTo a certain degree i agree with you, BW should celebrate other BW and we should stick together. We should celebrate each other. After that I decline. You mention the other jealous blacks as a reason for why Hollywood may not start appreciating women like her more and that makes no sense to me. I agree we should create our own tables but this is still a swirl blog. Are we really perpetuating the belief that we aren't wanted--even in Hollywood? Times change and yea plain janes will be in but we also need to understand that Hollywood is always looking for the next big thing. Something new. Women like Lupita are in my opinion the next wave. More and more, Beautiful and elegant BW are being appreciated on screen and once that idea Really catches on it wont stop. People already like BW but think we are un approachable based on a few stereotypes. The more they see the truth the further ingrained we will be. Years from now who knows what the norm will be in the media? Views that tell us we need shrink back and further separate ourselves just because of the opinions of a few people are not only pessimistic but are what keep alot of the BC in its current position.