Dating & Marrying Ethnic Men

On Pleasing the BC: Damned if We Do…Damned if we Don’t

This post is not for the regulars. Just like I point out the good, I’m going to point of the bad. Not just bad, but utterly horrible.

I was sent an audio interview between an author and blogger, Pearl Jr. and Tariq Nasheed. And after listening to this man’s blatant disrespect this man has for a black woman who is promoting black women stay in relationships with black men to strengthen the community, be more sexually responsible, embrace their natural beauty, be girly etc–you know, all the stuff men in the dark corner of Tariq’s sector say they want, should be enough to call his complete body of work into question.

But it doesn’t. This exchange is a year old. His platform has exploded. Hidden Colors is financing his lifestyle. He talks about the power of melanin while mocking the very women that contribute to it. I guess melanin powers work best on black men, but not so much for the women. And yet…I’m a bed wench, because I’m telling black women that they no longer have to take this type of abuse. It is not the black woman’s curse to be the black man’s donkey.

Here’s some of the highlights from the interview:

Pearl Jr. says she wears an afro:

Tariq: “Yeah; I saw you…looking like Sponge Bob.”

Reason for why black women wear blond weave and contacts, mostly to try to recapture the black man’s gaze:

Tariq: “Why would I want a bootleg blond? I’ll just get a real one.”

“Black women are doing all this stuff (being sexually suggestive, wearing weave, etc) to get your attention!”

Tariq: “If you got to do all that to get my attention, then I don’t need you.”

“Ya’ll think we get pregnant by ourselves.”

Tariq: “Ya’ll do!!”

After she’s talk about being submissive and loving to her BLACK man, he continues to mock:

Tariq: “If I were your man, I would beat the shit out of you. Listening to you and your disrespect for black men…I’d have all kinds of domestic abuse…[sic]”

“Shut the fuck up and cook!”

While Pearl Jr. has been loyal to her preference of black men, she says,”White men are givers. They are providers and protectors.” Her sister is married to a white civil rights lawyer. Her other sister married a white man who just got a $1 million inheritance. She tells black women that black women SHOULD look outside because black men are unwilling to provide and protect but what the BENEFITS of a woman who is being provided and protected. It’s disgusting.

Oh…and at the end, Pearl tries to reconcile. She says she would hug Tariq if she could. He responds, “I would hug you too, but would probably beat you in the process.” And the entire radio studio (comprised of black men) devolves in laughter.

This is what these men think about you.

But…I’m the bed wench.


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