I wasn’t going to write about it.
I saw the article on the Huffington Post like everyone else; about the woman who bemoaned out loud to mainstream America what many of us have picked up on for quite some time–there’s more than a few black men out there that aren’t too fond of black women, and that’s putting it VERY kindly.
On one hand, I thought the article published in such a highly circulated blog might be a positive thing, because it seems as if more black women are FINALLY beginning to ask the right questions.
But here’s where articles like this fall flat and makes black women look like pathetic beggars asking for stinky leftovers: When you acknowledge the problem (widespread disrespect, lack of reciprocity, wholesale rejection based on hue and hair texture hierarchy) and then STILL remain resistant about expanding your dating options with men of other races not shackled with all that self-hating baggage, proclaiming despite spittle running down your face that “You love the brothers and no one else will do!!!” then…you kind of look like an idiot. Worse; the men you so ardently proclaim you love lose what little respect they have left for you, because you’re basically saying that these men can do WHATEVER they want to you, and no matter what, you will STILL love them. *In my Dr. Phil voice, “How’s that working out for you?!”* Your martyrdom won’t make the men who’ve decided that you’re the most disgusting women on the planet change their minds. It only opens you up to further exploitation, draining of your time, and the destruction of your spirit.
More black women need to have this attitude:
Complaining, whining and bemoaning your station while stubbornly refusing to implement your own agency to change your inferior position (the beggar, not the begged for) is not showing yourself love. You were not put on this earth to be at the service of men who spit and shit on you while patting you on the head and use you as a jizz receptacle. You are MORE than that. You deserve BETTER than that. Could it mean a white man can give you better? Maybe. Could it mean an Asian man could give you better? Maybe. Could it mean a Hispanic man, or an Indian man, or an Eskimo could treat you better? YOU’LL NEVER KNOW, WILL YOU, IF YOU KEEP TURNING THEM DOWN FOR MEN WHO DON’T WANT YOU!!
So for the people who will come in here to proclaim that I hate black men for pointing out that water is wet and the sky is blue, just know I don’t hate you. I just love black women more than you do.