Written by Nicole
Let’s face it. Life is hard. And it’s hard for pretty much everybody. But as black women, we face unique challenges at the intersection of misogyny, racism, sexism, colorism, texturism, and featurism. And for many black women, our elders, such as our mothers, aunties, and grandmothers, did not hip them to the game as they could. Do not be discouraged though! While I do not claim to have all the answers (hell, I probably only have like…two answers!), I am happy to share a few life hacks that have been passed to me from my elders and mentors.
Now, these may seem like common sense to you. You may think, “Uh, who doesn’t know that already?”. Remember that black womanhood can and does look very different from woman to woman, and many black women and girls may not have had the same privileges you did. Not because you may not find this post valuable means someone else won’t. Besides, black womanhood would not look the way it does if more women were taking this simple yet effective advice on board.
With that in mind, here are four pretty simple life hacks that black women can use to level up in all areas of life!
All through this year I have harped on and on about moving in stealth. I keep going back to it because it is just that important. If you keep your successes and plans private, people who hope to see you fail will not be able to sabotage you. Those who seek to leech off you may not see you as a walking cash dispensary. And those who are truly in your corner will understand your decision to keep things quiet.
Another topic that gets harped on and on about is having children outside the confines of marriage. But too often, unwanted pregnancies are discussed as if it’s something that just happened out of the blue. Whoops, I tripped and fell onto a penis as it was about to ejaculate, and BAM! Got pregnant! How could that have happened?!
Except that’s not how it happens at all. If you don’t want to have a baby out of wedlock, then you will need more than a hope and a prayer to avoid that fate. Abstinence is great, and saves you not only from pregnancy scares, but STD scares too. However, if that’s not your thing, then you should use at least two forms of reliable birth control 100% of the time.
All too often you hear the story of the black woman who struck it big somehow, be it through her career, lottery, talent show, or something else, and she singlehandedly becomes the First National Bank of Supporting the Whole Block. It’s not easy, and maybe even sad, but you have to put yourself first, especially when it comes to finances. If you come into money, you should live below your means, and avoid advertising how well off you might be, even to your family.
You’d have a hard time convincing me that black folks don’t love struggle. They love it to the point where it is seen as some sort of treason when black women are resting, much less displaying any sign of luxury living. That love of the struggle is culturally sanctioned, passed down generation after generation. Instead of giving children everything and more to have a leg up in life, black people think it’s “character building” for their kids to be well-acquainted with the core tenets of said struggle. If there was no struggle, what would there be to…do? To fight against? It’s practically part of their identity.
So rather than be offended if you get called uppity or the rest of it, simply accept that others see struggle as their driving force, and your rejection of that lifestyle is seen as a rejection of them. And armed with that knowledge, move accordingly.
These four simple life hacks are quite simple to enact in your daily life. For the most part, they only require a mere mindset shift to change the trajectory of your life. By no means are these little hacks the only thing you can do, but it’s certainly a great start. Do you have any deceptively simple life hacks your fellow black woman could make use of? Share the knowledge in the comments below!
Disclaimer: This blog was written by me, Nicole. My ideas are not necessarily reflective of Christelyn Karazin or other writers on this platform.