Objectifying Our Girls…Thank the Gods Malia Has Body Guards.

Ok we made our voices heard  about Elizabeth Lauton’s disrespectful criticism of the President’s daughters, but if we do not address the even more disrespectful attitude of pro athlete Darnell Donner towards Malia Obama and men like him, we are acting in hypocrisy.  Now he is not the originator of the photo of Malia going down some stairs with her bottom as the focal point, it was an Instagram user with the handle @dreyday_4 that posted that along with the comment of “when is her prom?” Darnell reposted the photo with the comments “omgggg” and “lmfaooo”. Now there are those who will say or argue that what he did was not “as bad” as Elizabeth’s tirade, but I write this to address a bigger issue, the disrespect and objectification of black girls and women and the silence and or justification of black men, women and the (b) lack community  on the issue.

Malia Obama

It seems that black girls have to come out the womb fighting, which may explain why many have an angry, combative, defensive attitude by the time they are 18 years old (but that is for another discussion) and frankly I can understand why. Starting as early as the age of 7 or 8 they are prime candidates for sexual harassment, you heard me, SEXUAL HARASSMENT.  Entitled young black boys  grabbing their backsides, between their legs, speaking sexual things, adult men coming on to them  and now with the advent of the internet and social media others join the witch hunt. It was not just Elizabeth’s critique of their clothes  but how she constructed her statement  about their clothes, that how they looked implied they were sluts (dressed like they were going  to a bar). Their sexuality was brought into the conversation and that was uncalled for. These girls behaved or dressed in no way to justify those statements. Then you have @dreyday_4 and Darnell making agreeable statements about Malia that were inappropriate. She is not only the presidents daughter, but she is a CHILD developing into woman hood and already grown men are objectifying her and the fact she is the president’s daughter gives her as a young black girl no pass.
What I find the most disgusting about this is that it happens so often and on a regular basis that black people treat this as NORMAL. The comments poured in about Darnell’s behavior and a good number of  the commenters saw nothing wrong with @dreyday_4 and Darnell’s behavior. One commenter, a woman said this:

Sixteen is not a child; she is a budding woman. Please people, When we were 16 men of all ages complimented and flirted with us, did they not? That’s different from being a sexual predator and preying on young girls. Geez! “


Excuse me??? When I was sixteen, I had  my share of  this unwanted attention. I was one of those fast developing young girls and when I was in school and boys would try to grab my rear end, between my legs, or my breasts. Upon complaining to a teacher or adult, the boys would absolve themselves of  any wrong doing by saying “I was just playing” and upon seeing no bruises or bloodshed, the teachers would write it off as “boys will be boys”. Walking home from school was a nightmare with grown men trying to get my attention saying the most inappropriate things. I felt so violated! THAT is not flirting and it is not a compliment to be treated like a tramp. Then there was the human male that had this to say (and all the typos are his):


“How is he disrespecting her…u see a ass like that. And b like damn ok.

Thats what michelle looked like back n the day lol man u white people

get all in a fuss about a comment.

 Anything to attempt tobtear a black man apart..


Really? So because she has a nice bottom she should be objectified? According to this male someone expressing disgust on this is trying to destroy black men?? Give me a break! This has nothing to do with black manhood and everything to do with young black girls not being able to grow up and blossom into confident women without being treated like a piece of meat.  As far as I am concerned girls that age are still just that girls transitioning into womanhood and they should be able to do that without degradation and humiliation. For me this horrible “rite of passage” happened in the 80’s before the advent of social media so I cannot imagine what it is like  for young black girls today like Sasha and Malia where everyone has a camera phone  and can take photos  and post them on Instagram without your permission. Young boys and men taking photos of girls, saving them  and/or posting them on social media. I am sure Malia did not sign off on that photo of her to be the backdrop for grown men to objectify her with.

I find it amazing how quick  our people were to call Elizabeth to task for calling these girls classless tramps, but are not nearly as loud towards a black athlete or any black male in their community for that matter co-signing on objectifying them or girls like them. The hypocrisy is astounding. One Internet article made the statement that because Ms. Lauton was a conservative   the black community were more outraged at her than they were him. The political card could be played in this argument but this has less to do with political affiliation and more to do with the long history of devaluing of black women and girls and the deliberate choice of the (b) lack community to turn a blind eye to their abuse, harassment, and objectification. He should feel it in his wallet just like Elizabeth so everyone understands words are not cheap.Freedom of speech does not mean lack of boundaries.

Malia and Sasha are fortunate in that they are afforded a certain level of protection though they are not completely immune to the verbal assaults of people. Young black girls do not have the benefit  of secret service protection, so what an impact it would make if  people  collectively hauled every one into account from Elizabeth to Darnell into account leaving no stone unturned in their treatment of young black girls and leave their hypocrisy behind. More people would have to shape up  and understand they have a lot more to lose if they don’t. Like other girls no matter what their race, young black girls deserve to be loved, respected, cherished and protected whether they are daughters of the president or not.

Follow Christelyn on Instagram and Twitter, and subscribe to our YouTube channel. And if you want to be a little more about this online dating thing, InterracialDatingCentral is the official dating site for this blog.