Question of the Week

Question of the Week: “Is This All in My Head or the Start of (Possibly) Something Wonderful?”


*Hi BBW:*

*I found this site and have been a fan ever since. Love the honesty,
energy and most of all, openness and mutual respect found here…*
* *

*Deep breath and exhale….Ok. Here’s my rain beau story:*

*I joined a project team, and my (potential) rain beau and I both worked
out of different offices (separated by several states and time zones). Since
I hadn’t met him in person yet, my only interaction with him was through
weekly (and sometimes multiple daily) calls and emails. He had a
fantastic phone voice and awesome energy. Always upbeat and funny. So
much so that I started REALLY looking forward to the calls. We had the
same wacky sense of humour and approach to life. I felt myself falling
for him, but I was safe since: (1) I NEVER date anyone where I work and (2)
he was several states/a time zone away. So it was nice and simple–and
HARMLESS. I could admire him from afar, flirt a little during our calls,
fantasize every now and then, and then be on my merry way. During one of
our now infamous project status calls, we were both laughing hysterically
about the project and he sent me a picture of himself–not quite sure why,
but he did. OMG. My worst fears were realized. HE WAS BEAUTIFUL. From
that point on, I knew that it was over for me. I was toast. Burnt toast at
that. To top it off, there was an upcoming meeting where all of the teams
would meet in person to discuss project plans (for a whole week!!!). No
worries. If I could just keep myself together and stay professional,
everything would be just fiiiiiiiiiiiiine. This has NEVER happened to me
before. With ANYONE. Rain beau or not. I’m talking about real
chemistry on almost every level. Sight unseen. And was actually FINE,
too? (remember the picture?) I mean, seriously. It really caught me off
guard (and scared me just a little bit too). Who knew?!*

Anywho, I somehow got through the week long meeting with my sanity intact,
and we were now back at our respective offices. IN DIFFERENT STATES. AND
TIMEZONE. I was safe once again. Then something odd happened: He called
and asked if I left a flirty note for him (while at the project meeting). Um,
how old are we, twelve? I gently told him no, that the note was not from
me. He seemed a little disappointed. I told him that if I were interested
in him, he would never have to guess. Again, he seemed really disappointed
that the note wasn’t from me. I realize NOW that maybe I should have said:
“would you have WANTED me to write that note?” My guess is that it was
probably from one of his many admirers while at the project meeting. About
a month later, he calls me and tells me that HE IS LEAVING THE COMPANY FOR
ANOTHER JOB and that he WANTS TO TALK TO ME AT HOME WHEN I AM FREE. We had the call. It was wonderful. He exact words during the call were: “I
could definitely see this going to the next level”. It looked promising,
and I was excited….*

Ok folks, back to earth. Now I am having doubts because a strange pattern
has emerged. He will send an email saying that even though he is busy
with new job, he will still call during x time period. The call doesn’t
happen and there is no follow up from him. The first time it happened, no
big deal. I reached out to find out what happened. Got an apology and
explanation and his promise to call at another specific time. Same
scenario and same outcome–no call and no follow up. What?! Alarm bells
are going off at this point. When it happened again in a short period (3
strikes) I called him directly at work and basically told him –very
sweetly mind you–that he was officially done, good luck with the new job
and have nice life. Did I mention that I was very pleasant? No need for
rudeness, as I am ALWAYS a lady . I wished him a wonderful day as

Then CLICK. I think he went into shock. He asked for another chance. I am
torn. I really didn’t want to give him one, but since I really like him as
a person, I’m considering it. Not sure if I can trust him with my heart. Is
this even worth it? . It is just safer to be just friends with him and
forget the romance? Or should I just drop him cold turkey and keep it
*OK. I’m done, and I’m listening…. Thanks in advance, everyone!*

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