Book Writing Adventures

What the Cuss is All the Fuss?! The REAL Reason that Black Woman is Hating on You and Your Man.

Stick a sock in it already!

Thank you, Rainbeaux, for introducing me to the phrase, “what the cuss.” Not only is it rib-tickling, it works as a fine substitute for the vulgarity I wish I could use, if only I didn’t have so many children.

Now I know how much respect you have for Dr. B.S. Detector regarding his ground-breaking research and diagnosis of Denial and Defensiveness Psychosis (DPD), but just to make sure the doctor that resides in my own head jibes with the real ones who actually have PhD’s, I thought I would bring back… yes! you guessed it; the lovely Linda Young, PhD (sorry Dr. B.S., she’s already got you beat).

While Dr. Young and Dr. B.S. Detector may disagree on treatment options for DDP (e.g. hot monkey sex with Hugh Jackman, surgical removal of the cranium from the anus, or as lafemmenior brilliantly suggested, shock therapy), she does however, have something to say about black women who feel it is their God-given role to secure a harem for black men under the guise of promoting the fabled, ‘Black Love’ pseudo-fantasy.

But first, just a question: do any of the torch bearers for Black Prince Charming realize that black women outnumber black men by 2 million? So, hmmm….I not too bright when it comes to math, but even a numbers dumbo like myself can figure there aren’t enough grooms for every bride. So…what then? Polygamy? Nun by default? What do these volunteer enforcers want marriage-minded black women to do? Shut the hell up and get a vibrator?

Here’s a little tidbit from my interview with Dr. Young:

BB&W: Why are some black women so eager to criticize other black women for their choice to date interracially? Why does this issue cause such a viseral reaction?

DR. YOUNG: People saying vicious things to you or attacking you in ways that want to insult you or knock you down in some way for your preferences is a form of harassment or bullying (flashback of high school bitches comes to mind) and some of the same stuff that goes on with people who bully other people. There’s something going on to protect what they feel might be threatened by your choice. It might have them thinking about something they find uncomfortable to think about, or they have dogmatic, rigid thinking of their own and in order to defend rigid thinking without opening your self up more broadly, sometimes people resort to tactics of protecting themselves in a fundamentalist sort of way. The person who is defensive has to look inside themselves and see what they’re trying to protect that they either don’t fully understand, feel threatened by, or have preconceived notions about.

Just to go off on a tangent for a quick sec, my Facebook friend, Caparice, summed up this issue in a pithy nugget and I wanted to share:

It’s like a victim loving their attacker. Black men have on more than one occasion state in more than one venue that they can’t stand black women, hate black women, loathe black women and black women keep loving them and getting nothing positive in return. It’s like a dog vomiting and then going back to lick up its own vomit. It’s disgusting, sad and pathetic. Now why they are upset (the bw who hate other bw for getting their swirl on) they are upset because they have brought into this ideology that ALL black women feel as they do (that bm are kings, the best) and they feel like fools when they see that not ALL of us as bought that can of goods and refuse to buy it regardless of whom is selling it.

…and then she shared some SERIOUS drama:

I can’t tell you how many times I have gotten into it with Black Women because they are upset that the guy I was with at that time was white. I even in my employment have had to file charges against a black female co-worker for sexual harassment because of some of the things she would say to me when she saw that my bf at that time was white. I love white men. Period. I have always been attracted to them and have never had a genuine attraction to black men. Its a preference, like apple jacks “You eat what you like,” I love whom I like.

By the way, Caparice, I HATE Apple Jacks, but I TOTALLY feel you on the other stuff.

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